>>42538498 (OP)
This guy definitely watched too much Mr Robot and Sherlock. I can also sense a hint of Disco Elysium in there too. I'm not complementing him, because his video fails to replicate the same quality. It feels like a parody that isn't aware of what makes the original work. If I could reshape the show then I'd ditch the 40 year old protagonist. Instead I'd go for an overly confident one that's blessed with an unparalleled intellect, but cursed to navigate a world of fools. The Astro Boy like protagonist could work, but I feel a girl would fit the character better. It would be interesting to see how a child comes to terms with having a God-like intellect. I'm against the furry character. His design is fine, but doesn't match the pony esthetic. He feels especially shoehorned in considering he wasn't in any of the promotional material. Starting straight with the action was a wise choice for the pilot. It's a great way to get the audience's attention quickly and deliver a solid outline of the show. The detective portion felt too short though. All good detective stories have a mystery the audience can solve along side the protagonist. The man was suspicious from the start, which took away most of the suspense from the scene. The hacking part felt too convenient. There was little struggle involved. It'd be interesting if the man had something on him that gave away the fact that he had two daughters. Like a key-chain with their faces on it, or if you want to go the hacking route you could show that is has 4 network providers under his name. Overall the conclusion was lukewarm. The film failed to establish who the protagonist was in the first section, so it was difficult to accept the shift in scenery towards the end. The main pony's design is fine, but the other two seem half done. The main issue for me is the color scheme. There's too much dissonance between the setting and their designs. I would have preferred something like the furry's color. It's hard to pin point their character, because their designs lack substance. As a closing statement: I understand the mantra "learn the rules then break them", but it's important to not forget that this should be applied as a way to strengthen a story. It shouldn't be the foundation of one.
If 5 is average then this is a 4.5/10
Nice animation
Flawed plot
Below average design
I'm eager to see more
