Thread 127070537

A bald fat guy so bald that he removes your entire hairline edition

Previous thread: >>127064961

FAQ: https://www.metal-archives.com/

>>127070537 (OP)
We're in here

BLASTING

REAL BLASTINGS

Meal?

Trhä is one of those bands where you can glance at a release and already know to buy it.

>>127070550
>>127070553
Why is there two blasting posts in all the recent threads?

>>127070580
You can thank the modclique for another spam routine.

.

>>127070618
This looks like the gayest and most pretentious shit imaginable.

>>127070631
Go to bed, Adam

>>127070550
>>127070553


>>127070631
Its a beautiful album old man

Thoughts on J-Dawg?

>>127070649
Steroids are... le based!

>>127070649
BALD AF

>>127070649
Melting rot is the only thing he’s recommended i didn’t like.

>>127070649
based retard

Deftones
Knocked Loose
Sleep Token
Blood Incantation

Only real metalheads can solve this puzzle.

>>127070682
We don't sign our posts here.

>>127070648
This looks like war metal.

Why didn't they get Mr. Bungle to play at Ozzy's farewell tour?

>>127070713
Why would they?

>>127070716
Dude you know how many Bunglers would have paid extra just to see the Bung' live? More than any of the other bands maybe lol.

>>127070683
Is the puzzle autism?

Bungle rhymes with ______

Grundle?

Are you ready to rumble

Black Sabbath - Vol. 4

>>127070753
Holy shit, this cover is awesome! Kind of reminds me of Elder Ring or Bloodborn, two of my favorite games right now haha.

>>127070756
Not metal.

>>127070756
based

I swear if Ozzy performs one more bloody time... God save the king.

>>127070649
the most based /metal/ poster

this best shartings guy only chooses bongman tier tourist albums

>>127070827
Holy shit you're right.

>luv me abba melodies
>luv me 'oly -acktolic church
>luv me pedo priests
>luv me 'irgin mary
>luv fucking me sheep

simple as

>>127070882
i actually listened to this stupid shit. it sounds like bon jovi with some slav folk thrown in.

Latest metal shirt purchase?

>>127071427
I wonder if this picture was staged for the album cover or if it is just taken from some JAV scatporn

Say something nice about the protagonist of metal

>>127071511
talentless hack

>>127071362
Did you purchase that

>>127071362
I hope a Russian doesn't beat me up

>>127071511
megadookie and diaper dave shitstaine suck donkey dingaling

*ahem*
Tank

>>127070649
His schtick got boring ages ago
His channel is carried by 10 or so weirdos who dish out money to ask him irrelevant questions

Is this man a music genius?

>>127071909
>carried by 10 or so weirdos
sounds familiar...

>>127071919
I don't trust anyone with an exposed chest

>>127071919
Incredible technical ability, middling actual songs

>>127071923
Browsing /meal/ is free
False equivalence

JuteGyte

>>127071952
incoherent post

>>127072005
retard

>>127070580
one is always a gay baitpost like trha or in this case sleep token

>>127072032
ironic post

do you like 90s death/tech death

>>127072390
of course

>>127071511
he wrote Load and ReLoad i'm told

>>127072390
luv me some jungle rot

>>127071919
Yes.

Artist: Darkthrone
Album: Panzerfaust
Song: Beholding The Throne of Might

>And destruction upon the holy man
>Who hails a jew

>>127070753
Listen to their demo Morbidious Pathology if you haven't. Sounds very little like the album, but it's some truly savage Death Metal.

>>127072599
the demo comp rules

>>127072616
Based. Now check out Blood Urn. You can download their demo/album for free on bandcamp. You'll dig em.

>>127072670
Added to my never ending list of shit I need to check out

youthanasia is a fun as fuck hard rock/heavy metal album

Any of you faggots going to inkarceration tomorrow?

>>127072839
Based. Also check out Cemetery Urn's last album Suffer the Fallen.

>>127073152
Grim-looking line up for the most part

>>127070550
The new album made Ghost click for me. Now I'm going back to the debut and I'm liking it even though it never did it for me before.

>>127073240
___ _____

>>127073187
>those CANOES headlining over suffo

>>127073245
Nope it's metal. Am listening and can confirm

>>127072390
Yes, but not that crappy nappy diaper doodoo.

>>127070618
What if I need the keys to the mystic gates and astral doors? Whatchu know about that? Don't tell me nothin'. You gotta at least know somebody who knows. Please bro, I been stuck on this quest for 350 years

>>127070550
>>127070553

>>127073240
that's the only ghost i like and it's a 6/10 at best

>>127073155
>Cemetery Urn mentioned
saar please redeem this reaction image for future use
but I am sure with the great quality discussion here, you will not often find it needful :)

>>127073308
We'll see. I only know their first and last now, gotta try the stuff in between.

>>127073240
You have to go back.

>A mellified man, also known as a human mummy confection, was a legendary medicinal substance created by steeping a human cadaver in honey.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mellified_man

Metal for this substance?

>>127073392
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZXBNqGsjBA

>>127073340
Whither

hehehehehe... you can never escape ebil, /mu/tants....

>>127070882
You are an impostor and a bastard

NSBM reigns supreme. In a world populated by fags.

I really like long black metal songs, especially if they have a good interlude.

>>127073563
>NSBM reigns supreme
>world populated by fags
gee i wonder why it reigns supreme

>>127073506
we prefer the terms 'poser' and 'whoreson' here

>>127073566
>I really like long black
that post took an unexpected turn

wait you're telling me 'Abigail Williams' isn't some cringe zillenial deathcore band?
should I blast the new one

>>127072950
its too slow. the live versions of the songs which are faster paced sound much better

>>127070550
Absolutely loved Melissa, but haven't listened to this one yet

>>127073607
Long black ... riffs?
Big black ... riffs?
There's something here but I'm not a comedian so I can't put them together.

>>127073742
try putting the word pee after pee slowy, and then say it in rapid succession

>>127071952
browsing /metal/ costs your soul

dissodookie

>>127073758
All I got was "psipsipsipsi" and my cat came from the other room

>>127073878
you dummy, you cast the cat summon spell

>>127073885
Oh no, what's gonna happen now?? (I have my battle axe and spikes ready)

>>127073922
Swathes of cats from all across the land will tear down your castle gates and kill the king.

>>127073240
BELIEVE IN ONE GOD DO WE
SATAN ALMIGHTY

>>127073941
Holy shit it's HAPPENING

>>127073667
It's almost better than Melissa but starts to fall off in the last few tracks imo. Still, that means side B is like 8/10 where side A is a 10.

What a fucking letdown.

>>127074145
I actually thought side B was better than side A lol, both were effectively perfect to me but B had a bit more atmosphere and the songs stuck out to me just a tad more

>Mogs all previous death metal albums

nice genre keks

>inb4 muh morbid angel

Boring, uninspired slop. Barely got past the first 5 tracks on their most acclaimed album, no cohesion, boring riffs, bad production.

>>127074228
not metal

>>127074228
It's so good that most metalheads hate it. Supreme.

>>127074253
only retards in this general

>>127074262
you're also in this general

>>127073625
>sputnikmusic

>>127074228
Altars of Madness has boring riffs? Opinion discarded. But I will give that album a try thanks sweetie

>>127074274
it's a good album but i think it starts to all mesh together by the end

>>127074274
>Altars of Madness has boring riffs

Yes? I get that it was maybe groundbreaking at the time, but that shit is snooze inducing. It's just incredibly mid.

>>127074228
I'll stick with Mithras, thanks

>>127074186
Side B actually has my favorite 2 songs on the record (Gypsy, The Oath) but I like the more circuitous songwriting on side A better overall. Same deal with Melissa, side A is just so stacked even though Black Funeral is a total banger and Satans Fall their most epic track.

>>127074228
It's a good album that's overhated and overrated but Bedsore did it better.

>>127074274
entombed mogs MA hard.

>>127074335
Lol

I get my weed from California.

>>127074318
Can't agree at all, I love it the whole way through

>>127074334
>some literal who band

You're not as interesting as you think you are.

Butt Stinkantation is so good that their fans seek affirmation every thread.

>>127074335
most early death metal is way better than MA. Suffocation, Entombed, Death, Sepultera, Deicide, etc.

Morbid Angel peaked with FFtF and Gateways

>>127073321
>>Cemetery Urn mentioned
>saar please redeem this reaction image for future use
>but I am sure with the great quality discussion here, you will not often find it needful :)

>>127074389
Why does somebody knowing something you don't threatening to your ego? You should meditate on that.

>>127074228
Album is fine but only really shines live for me.
Shit on them for being a Reddit/RYM darling all you want, that Absolute Elsewhere show I went to this year was some of the best metal live performance I have ever seen.

>>127074145
It's better than Melissa in every way.

>>127074398
Give it a year

I saw Emperor a couple months ago and it was unironically the best metal show I've ever seen. Always thought Anthems was better than Nightside, but them playing songs from Nightside was fucking incredible.

>>127074228
people here are terrified of the idea that any modern metal in any genre can match or exceed the "classics".

>>127074474
Yeah it was a good show, but why the FUCK did they skip Beyond the Great Vast Forest?

>>127074510
It has though, just not by BI.

>>127074406
Gateways filters me. It sounds like Incantation.

>AEfag post got seven replies
Why is this general so retarded, bros?
>>127074249
>teeth worm things in the background
A rare improvement over the original cover art.

>>127074695
Gateways sounds nothing like Incantation.

>>127074398
I prefer Pantera.

>>127074724
the songs sound the same and it is their heaviest album

>>127074783
Oh ok

pick a group, the others are erased

>group a
morbid angel
deicide
malevolent creation
death

>group b
suffocation
immolation
incantation
morpheus descends

>group c
dismember
entombed
grave
unleashed

>group d
demigod
demilich
amorphis
sentenced

any good albums that are focused on drumming?

>>127074869
I can't not have Immo
>>127074892
Confessor - Condemned

>>127074869
Florida > New York > Finland > Sweden

>>127074892
Taake - Nattestid

I just roke up

>>127074335
>>127074398
Nap time, grandpa.

>>127073255
>Deicide opening for Behemoth and not the other way around
J-Dog lost.

>>127073152
Caveman riffs is more of core thing

>>127075117
ULTRA BASED

>>127075238
No

>>127070550
Listening to the gay shit cause I just roke up.

>>127074869
get rid of them all

>>127070553
Not metal.

>>127075394
You're not metal, you fucking guy.

>>127070550
peak atmoshit

>>127074892
Depends what you mean by "focused". There's obviously bands like Absu where it's Proscriptor's band and his main instrument.
If you just mean where the drumming is one of the more integral parts of the album then stuff like this gets my drumfag dick hard.

>>127073625
I'll be honest I've tried both The Accuser and Walk Beyond The Dark and they're not amazing. Kinda standard modern metal trying to be more progressive than it actually is.
WBTD had one banger track and a lot of snoozing.
Can't tell you about the new one yet, but I don't expect much. Hopefully they improved over 6 fucking years.

>>127075532
>flag literally just unfolded out the package
Sloppy job Mossad

>>127075517
basically albums with drumming like this

>>127075565
First one that comes to mind really.

>>127074892
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fhKYWT7WSg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5G36bh4ANY

>>127075503
>hail satan \m/ I love gurgling abortion blood BUT DON'T YOU DARE BE RACIST!

>>127075532
*sardonic face of pure analyzing* Can't be real right? Other than the obvious fresh creases in the flag, having a hot pockets box that sould have like 20 servings in there makes no sense. Sure a wrapper or two maybe, but you leave the box in the freezer and take the individual servings out to microwave them. Seems like a lazy attempt at making a 'slob's room'. The floor doesn't even look dirty under the random crap strewn about, which comes across as very inorganic.

>>127075503
Meatcanyon is hella based and can even be seen wearing a 200 Stab Wounds shirt in some of his videos \m/

Varg is gay and has AIDS.

>>127070882
America really lost its way when Catholics stopped being ostracized and oppressed

>>127075619
>>127075542
Awful chud cope. You see yourself in him.
And that picture has been photoshopped by /pol/ to make the chud terrorist more presentable.

Can I get some metal suggestions for unholy Satanik terrorists?

Dave Mustaine killed Gar Samuelson

>>127075854
can tell you're fake as if you were real you'd be filtered

>>127075924
Who the fuck is gar samuelson

If Ozzy Osbourne was an Asterix & Obelix character, he'd be Diappershitterix.

>opening track is a cover of Mexican Radio
How do they have such a great sense of humour on their albums but Tom G. Warrior comes off as someone who can’t take a joke IRL?

>X isn't metal
Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it's not metal
>It's not about whether I like it. Y isn't metal and I like them just fine.
Okay, what characteristic of metal does X lack?
>It fucking sucks

Why are they like this?

>>127076132
Thompson will never be metal and his war exploits are made-up.

>>127076132
Yeah it's really hard to understand
>Slipknot
>5fdp
>Godsmack
>Disturbed
All these bands are absolute ass, I'm not disputing that, but people say they are metal, they themselves say they are metal, mainstream sources say they are metal, but I can't really define what makes them "not metal", they just feel off somehow, I can't put my finger on it
There are also bands that suck but are definitely metal and nobody argues against that

>>127076253
All these bands are great but they are not metal.

I'm not falling for the psyop. USBM is actually great.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEjLoHdbVeE&list=RDXEjLoHdbVeE&start_radio=1
I thought this was the guy from Immortal? WTF happened!?

You can dance, you can jive, haVING the TIME of youur life

>>127075422
Sleep Token definitely isn't metal lol, just pop

Rob Halford / Jani Lane

https://youtu.be/I0wzwQgvpoA
Slayer heard this then they made Reign in Blood right?

>>127076132
Thompson will never be metal

>>127075932
No I'm the real deal, brother. I'm as fat and gay and retarded as ever. 4troon just changed the tripcode algo since they got hacked.

>>127070550
Time to wrap up the original trilogy

>>127076550
id fuck off back off mate, the thread's too dead to even kill anymore

>>127070537 (OP)
Why is Slayer so cringe?

>>127076594
/metal/ are really pulling out the big guns now

Using classical paintings as album covers is the most faggot thing a band can do

Skeletonwitch really rule.

>>127076678
ehhhh they're okay but thats about it

lmao he's back
>>127076040
>>127076693

Starting a woke NSBM band

We don't hate Jews or minorities but we do go out and throw bricks at striking workers and beat them with baseball bats

Name a more mid band than Amon Amarth
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VLMKHikNrM

>>127076722
I don't give a shit

>>127076739
Then why did you reply

>>127076737
Sabaton, easily.

>>127076735
Call your band Scabkiller.

200 Scab Wounds

>>127076735
>"i'm the real deal"
>immediately starts going back to political shitposting
You make it really hard to not wish you were dead.

IN FLAMES

I'm a founding member of the Jester Race, AMA

>>127076750
>>127076761
Noted and taken. Will be sure to credit Anon in our liner notes.
>>127076768
My one goal in life is to be a nuisance wherever I go

>>127076786
Have you made a single person laugh?

Colony > Jester Race > Clayman > Whoracle > Lunar Strain > the rest

>>127076819
Yeah, your mom. LOL

>>127076786
Have you ever had sex on acid?

>>127076838
No, I believe most drugs are for lesser human beings.

>>127076848
You're not a true metaller until you've become a psychonaut.

>>127076786
What do you think of FartTown's signature farts being outsourced to PoopCity's poop processing plant?

Any /metal/-worthy melodeath recs? I've heard the gothenburger bands already

Any trannies ITT?

>>127076860
If you dont take drugs you are forbidden from listening to metal.

>>127076737
Anthrax

>>127076871
Picrel.
>>127076875
You're not drugs unless you listen to metal tho

>>127071919
OyVey isn't as perfect as his worshipers believe, but he's better than his detractors suggest.

Part of Yngwie's problem is his Scandi aloofness. Combined with his (mostly justified) belief in his own ability, to non-Scandinavians he ends up coming off like a supreme asshole - when he's really just a regular and entertaining asshole like a lot of guitarists.

There's a YT vid of Vai filling time during an equipment failure on stage, joking about Yngwie and the old "Who are you and get out of my chair."

>>127076873
Yes me, Hector.

>>127070550
What happens when you combine 1983 Hellhammer with 1988 Blasphemy? 1991 Black Metal. The only band ever to actually deserve the name.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5-vpdPYXfk

>>127076737
Accept, their only great release is Restless and Wild

>>127076871
If you want old school shit
Garden of Shadows, early Sentenced, Gates of Ishtar and Carcass

If you want sad proggy shit
Be'lakor, In Mourning, An Abstract Illusion and Insomnium

If you want cheesy but fun shit
Mors Principium Est, Wintersun and Kalmah

>>127076907
>combine 1983 Hellhammer with 1988 Blasphemy
You have my attention.

>>127076907
Second-wave then, correct?

>>127076896
Shut up already you child molester.

Warhammer scratches that Hellhammer itch like none other. That's their entire MO.

>>127076922
shit I meant 1989
>>127076925
I mean technically, from a purely chronological point of view, but not if by second wave you mean "norwegian"

>>127076946
I hate Warhammer and bands like it. Get your own sound, for fuck's sake. What a cult of no-personality these fucker run. Even more embarrassing than post-2006 Darkthrone. Only marginally better than pizza thrash.

>>127076933
Hey, she said she was "catorce."

>>127076990
Bolt Thrower are the only good Warhammer inspired band

do we like architects?

>>127077018
Not metal

>>127077025
You're right it's an occupation

>>127077025
why not

>>127077025
um

>>127077047
>core
Ah then that settles it, fag shit is not metal

okay what about make them suffer?

>>127077063
Name sounds like -core

YOU WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US

metalcore is metal

>>127077077
They are deathcore

>>127077088
Yep, knew it. -core = fag shit, not metal

>>127077086
Only melodic metalcore like Killswitch Engage, Darkest Hour and As I Lay Dying

>>127077105
i like songs that are pure chaos and grunge and disgust, but then they have a beautiful melodic rose emerge out of it

>Metallum has Trivium but not Avenged Sevenfold
I really don't get their standards

>>127077125
Because Trivium moved to thrash later on in their career if I remember right

>>127077125
>>127077131
Trivium were always more thrashy, some of their early stuff is blatant Metallica worship

>>127076907
I cared enough to buy it cause there are no free copies I could find anywhere that were above 160kbps. I'll share it here later.

>>127076550
The only thing you have going for you is your hate for popery and priestcraft.

>>127077160
Well then there you go, they had metal shit to balance out their fagginess

Reminder that Lorna Shore got accepted into Metalarchives based on their latest album

>>127077018
We ARE architects.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThufZ5J0R-w

is poppy metal?

>>127077221
Is she on the archives?

>>127077193
Good album, by the way.
>>127077221
I've never cared to listen to her even once.

what about spiritbox?

>>127077428
Yuck, sounds like a pop group

one day my taste in metal will be respected here...

>>127076326
Provide a definition of metal that excludes those four bands but includes Sabbath, Maiden, Megadeth, Metallica, Priest, Death, Venom, Blind Guardian, Ministry, Fear Factory, Carcass, Napalm Death, Helloween, Queensryche, and Opeth.

Top 5 Jute Gyte albums. GO

>>127077509
Those four bands are butt rock, which is not metal

>>127077509
Are you saying it's impossible to include that breadth of bands without excluding the 4 named? I see the point you're trying to make but those 4 do seem to be dfiferent from the ones you named. Though I agree with you that they are metal at least

i miss the timberly poster

>>127076253
>but I can't really define what makes them "not metal", they just feel off somehow, I can't put my finger on it
Because while a few may be somewhat metal influenced (namely Slipknot), most of these bands pull from different lineages than metal. And if in the majority of the album I can't hear riffs that came from either Sabbath, Deep Purple, or Judas Priest in SOME form it isn't metal
I'd say of those bands, 5FDP and Slipknot are the most "metal" but they don't have a fully metal album, only occasional songs

>>127076566
booba

Creed is metal.

>>127077575
false

>>127077575
Alter Bridge is more metal than Creed

Staind is metal.

Slipknot is heavier than 90% of shit posted here

>>127077592
>hurr durr I CANT LAUGH

Audioslave is metal.

You aren't worthy of a (You) get better bait

>>127077526
Butt rock is a descriptor of who is listening to the music, not the music itself. It's just an attempt to gatekeep rednecks out of metal.
>>127077541
>do seem to be different
What's different?

>>127077599
false

Breaking Benjamin is metal.

Green Day is metal.

>>127077605
>What's different?
I confess that I don't know what's different exactly
>Butt rock is a descriptor of who is listening to the music, not the music itself. It's just an attempt to gatekeep rednecks out of metal.
Not the guy who called them 'butt rock' but I thought buttrock referred to stuff like Crush 40 and the song "Fuel" by Metallica

The Beatles are metal.

>>127077611
false

U2 is metal.

>>127077633
Careful anon, there are "people" that actually believe this

Oasis is metal.

Portal? Beloved.

>>127077633
>>127077641
I Want You is the first Doom Metal track. You don't have to like it but it's true

hey i posted actual metal, this guy is just memeing

Radiohead is metal.

>>127077626
this one isn't even arguable

Johnny Cash is metal.

>>127077650
No it's not, there's a song from 1967 (I think it was a band called Clear Light?) that's just sabbath three years prior

>>127070550
>thread speed has picked up
Yup, I'm thinkin' it's time for some Skeletonwitch.

>>127077677
the thread speed picked up because some fucktard called creed metal and now everyone's started a chain

>>127077668
Johnny was a sensitive man, just like Adolph Hitler.

Journey is metal.

oh my gosh NONE OF THAT IS METAL
YES, ARCHITECTS IS METAL
YES, MAKE THEM SUFFER IS METAL
YES, POPPY IS METAL
YES, SPIRITBOX IS METAL
THE REST ARE NOT

I'll make the new thread

>>127077694
>>127077694
>>127077694
NEW

>>127077598
>he still thinks Ledney's whole coomer persona is 'ironic'

>>127076990
>>127077006
Brain-dead fucking retards.

>>127077707
it's funny because it's not ironic

>>127077715
Ok fair enough.

>>127077697
shan't be posting in that thread

>>127073941
MISTY MORNIN

>>127074228
utterly failed at blending the 2 distinct sounds in a cohesive manor. it sounds like i'm switching between 2 completely different bands. can't even do what Opeth managed to do 30 years ago

>>127076594
the vocals on regin in blood sound like someone shaking their head with a half open mouth full of water

>>127076823
you are not allowed to be this correct