Thread 2838199

*gets on you*

>>2838199 (OP)
Legitimately hate this more than ticks and mosquitoes.

>>2838199 (OP)
I gut animals but somehow this shit disgusts me.

>>2838199 (OP)
>+1 armor and +1 cammo added

>>2838199 (OP)
>Walk through trail
>Get covered in enough spider webs to make a silk shirt
>Walk back out
>Some how get covered in enough webs to make a matching set of silk pants
You would think they'd get tired of making the same web over and over, maybe they just like watching us wipe them off our faces.

Legitmate how do they even do it? Do they jump or what?

How does a spider even get from point A to B with a web

>>2838564
They set an anchor point and wait for a gust of wind to blow then they jump and let the wind carry them to another object.

>>2838566
This is how I make multi-point belays

>>2838566
That sounds so based. I'd love to be a spider, just swinging from place to place, scurrying away from birds with expert level stealth skills, killing all those stupid flies.
As a spider you will have literally 100's of kids, and you can design your own cool webs to attract the ladies.
Spiders are honestly the best small creature on the planet, they will even kill other insects for you. Just give them a nice corner somewhere in your house and they will eat all your bad bugs.
Though you do have to worry about getting eaten by a woman, but then again that isn't much different from human life these days.
One day I will die and be reborn as a spider, wagmi.

>>2838564
I've seen a spider thread that crossed a small river. No idea how it did it.

>>2838564
>>2838645
Its like fishing. They let out a long line with a sticky bit at the end, wind catches it on something and they use that to cross.

>>2838246
Then, you haven't really experienced ticks and mosquitoes. Have you even been /out/? Are you some woman who enlists the help of others to kill bugs in the house?

I avoid walking through them just to not waste the spider's time and energy. Mr. Spider put a lot of effort into his web, you know?

>>2838199 (OP)
>doesn't, because I walk with one of my trekking poles out in front of me
It must suck to be you.

>>2838661
>tick: just pull it off
>mosquito: bug spray
>spider web: impossible to avoid, electromagnetically attracted to your mouth and eyes. Seems to have the supernatural ability to phase through all attempts at brushing it off.

Umbrella chads just keep on winning

>>2838749
>umbrella
>chad
Tits or gtfo; no man uses an umbrella except as a weapon or as a tool other than its intended purpose.
Only "males" who have long since turned in their penis lisence.

>>2838763
Indoor enthusiast detected. This is an umbrella user forum.

>>2838763
Nah, umbrella anon is right. He always spergs about umbrellas in every thread, but now that I'm in my 30s I realize he's absolutely right about the utility of one. I'm just too lazy to carry one so I wear those thin hoodies you always see on the mountain.

>>2838763
>nu-out
kek

>>2838199 (OP)
I just wear a hat and walk with a slightly lowered head

>>2838621

based drowposter, I feel the same

>>2838769
>>2838814
>>2838867
When your dresses get back from the dry cleaners maybe you girls can have a tea party in the park, which is far /out/ as you gals ever go

>>2838621
There are species that make little "balloons" out of a ton of strings just floating in the air, and they drift on thermals and wind.

They can cross ridiculous distances that way.

It's magnificent.

>>2838873
>I just wear a hat and walk with a slightly lowered head
What? What would that accomplish? Do spiders where you live only make lines at the height of your forehead or higher?

>>2838910
no, but I only care if it gets on my face, glasses and my sweaty bald scalp

>>2838910
He's a manlet.

>>2838931
>>2838910
NTA but I’m much taller than average so if I’m not the first one on the trail there’s a good chance the spider webs that passed over other people heads will end up in my face.

>>2838939
6'3" and I've also experienced this exact same stupid situation. If I'm passing through a heavily wooded and wet area I'll just hold my forearm in front of me to prevent the spider silk from getting on my face.

Okay, serious question here; we're joking about umbrellas, hats, and so on, but even a kids we used to just casually wave a stick around in front of us if we saw a web, or if shrubs and trees were close enough together that a web might be there.
I mean, we just instinctually did that as children
And the sticks in the forest are free

>>2838967
I’m not joking about an umbrella. If you have it opened because of rain or sun, it can prevent spiderwebs from getting in your face. It’s one of the most multifunctional pieces of gear you can take on a hike.

>>2838982
>>2838986
I now fully realize this board is populated with people who are actually autistic.
I thought it was a joke more than anything. Wow

>>2838735
Spider webs are nature's reminder to stop being in such a damn hurry. This is a walk in the woods, not a commute to the office.

>>2838982
Did you know there are sticks that fork into smaller sticks? Sometimes there are even these flat green thingies called leaves on the end of the smaller sticks, which are called twigs. You might be able to pick one of these ingenious devices up for $9.88 at your local Walmart.

Time to sleep in and let someone else take them down for me, thanks sucker.

>>2838621
Anon, if all the women in your life are eating spiders, you may have a vampire problem

>>2838735
Enjoy your array of debilitating tickborne diseases, ma'am

>>2839280
literally no such thing, but keep on believing that there is like a good little drone :)