Thread 2841115

https://www.outdoorlife.com/survival/elk-hunters-missing-colorado-search/

They're dead, aren't they?

Talked to some folks from the area, I'm a bit north, they say they have no chance.

>San Juan Mtns near Durango

>>2841115 (OP)
I see 2 possibilities.
#1)
>Bill is fucking Fred's wife so Bill takes Fred "hunting".
>Fred gets suspicious. Bill wings Fred and he takes off. Turns into a Most Dangerous Prey scenario. Fred lies in wait and gets the drop on Bill but then bleeds out before he can get back to camp.

#2)
They come across drug smugglers or a meth lab and get whacked before they know whats happening. Bodies are decomposing in a shallow grave and will be discovered when Fido brings a femur back to some hikers camp.

>>2841115 (OP)
let me guess, """"""""experienced"""""" outdoorsman BUT
>couldnt start a fire
>couldnt tie knots
>couldnt identify edible plants
>couldnt build shelter
>couldnt make safe to drink water
because that's always how it is when you actually look into it

>>2841119
I think rock slide is quite likely, there was a storm in the area apparently and they may have tried something risky to cover more ground.

>>2841122
They do at least appear to be well equipped and in good physical shape.

You can be an internet warrior all you want and make assumptions about their skill but it was probably adequate for everything up to a crazy accident.

I would be fucking flabbergasted if strong males with thousands of dollars in gear managed to freeze to death or something overnight. That would be pathetic. A naked elderly person could have a decent chance at this time of the year.

>Got lost

Literally HOW

Colorado has sunny days every day like nigga look up see what direction you're going bruh

>>2841124
>You can be an internet warrior
not being an internet warrior
almost all missing people cases involving parks and rec says
>"X was really experienced at the outdoors"
and then you look into it they werejt experienced at all
also didnt some european kid a year ago get caught up in a snowstorm will filming for his youtube channel and freeze to death?
The guy brought tons of equipment too and went to a location that was known to become a tundra in the winter.

>>2841124
>Literally HOW
yeah you can see why im saying

>"""""experienced"""""
you can deny it all you want but we are absolutely on the same page here even if you dont like it

>>2841125
No male above the age of 9 should have to capacity to get lost at all

>>2841126
I don't even think you need to have been to the outdoors a single time in your life to possess the brainpower required to traverse land safely

Fitness and logical thinking far surpass one's skill level in extreme situations

>>2841128
that's very true.
take being severely dehyrated and starving into account though. Not saying this to be snide or a faggot.
Most people arent conditioned to continue rational thought in these circumstances and will almost always fold. Most have to condition themselves overtime to be able to rationally think in extreme circumstances or in exhaustive conditions. That's one of the points of bootcamp in the military and why they make you walk long ass distances with a shit load of gear. You get conditioned to it so that way when the real deal comes you dont metaphorically shit your pants having to walk a long distance

>>2841132
This is an extreme part of USA, for sure it is. It would be so nuts for these people to not be humble about that. I go on rather extreme minimalist adventures within 200 miles of this region and I bring 70+lbs of gear with me and most of it is water. I'm not from here. I didn't have to do research to fucking understand I needed to do this in this area.

One of my favorite bicycle routes

You have to bring a lot of tubes and water for this, thorns/goatheads are literally infinite and there are no services for a very serious distance

https://www.9news.com/article/news/local/search-underway-for-missing-hunters-southern-colorado/73-aa1b9832-78e9-4b27-bdf9-13a7cb859f8c

Welp, they dead

>>2841143
>Camping gear and backpacks were located in the vehicle
>recovered two miles from the Rio De Los Pinos Trail Head
Drowned on a quick dayhike, idk

>>2841115 (OP)
Its only been five days. Depends on how lost they are and how experienced they are. But if they were experienced they wouldnt be lost.

>>2841122
>couldnt identify edible plants
You can't go five days without eating?

>>2841115 (OP)
they are clearly fags so i bet they went and did a romeo and juliet type of anal sex suicide pact

>>2841143
I know its early.on in the investigation and all but its still surprising that no details were released other than the approximate location of where the bodies were discovered.

>>2841143
How the fuck did they only make it 2 miles in when they died? They had no gear on them so they walked for what, half an hour? An hour max? They didn't even start the trip

>>2841233
I don't think it's that surprising, the article says they haven't confirmed the bodies' identity yet so we'll know more after a poor family member is forced to look upon the remains.

I'm 27 now, it's sad to see I'm at the party of my life where people my age and younger are dieing all around me, mostly from mistakes or hubris. Let this be a PSA to anyone going /out/: you can fuck it up, so be prepared.

>>2841115 (OP)
They're Sasquatch's now.

>>2841238
i bet they died of fent. they probably thought they were doing coke but it was laced with fent. that or another trantifa suicide cult

When I hunted here in Louisiana (and a few times in Mississippi), we always told people exactly where we would be: parking here, won’t go north past that stream, won’t go south beyond this road, etc. The deer and hogs here are plentiful so we didn’t have to travel far. Is it different in Colorado? If so, are all hunters fit enough to carry a deer several miles back to their vehicle?

This is the most common unifying fact in these wilderness missing persons cases. They can’t be found because they didn’t tell anyone where they would be. It’s even more true now with dedicated GPS and smartphones.

>>2841122
>couldn’t tie knots
>couldn’t built shelter
The first implies that they brought supplies with them, specifically rope. Why wouldn’t that include a shelter, negating the need to build one?

They dead:

https://www.outsideonline.com/outdoor-adventure/exploration-survival/bodies-of-two-experienced-elk-hunters-reportedly-found-in-colorado/

>>2841247
>The first implies that they brought supplies with them, specifically rope. Why wouldn’t that include a shelter, negating the need to build one
faggot, if you get lost and lose your gear ine of the first things you're ginna need to do is build a shelter

>>2841175
no, i cant picrel is me

>>2841259
even knowing how to build one withoht rope is a good idea
gotta be prepared

>>2841247
>They can’t be found because they didn’t tell anyone where they would be.
another thing to consider is that they could have told someone and then ended up going somewhere else
we did that all the time at my old hunting ranch

Domed by hail?

>>2841259
>get lost AND lose your gear
LARP fag

>>2841311
>i cant do anything without my thousands of dollara worth of gear
fuck off faggot

>>2841312
Stop shitting up the board with this retarded “survival” scenarios. It’s fucking cringe.

>>2841136
Or you go tubeless, Jesus.

>>2841233
Not that weird. Local news channels aren't exactly gonzo journalists. They're gonna fill in the names and the places in as much detail as is easy to find then move on to the other 10 pieces they have to write. They're not gonna go triangulate the gulch or ridge where searchers found em.

Major win for the local Elk.

>>2841115 (OP)
https://cowboystatedaily.com/2025/09/22/coroner-lightning-strike-killed-elk-hunters-found-dead-thursday-in-colorado/

Lightning got them, shit. Yeah, you can't really do shit about that.

>>2841742
>The tree that Porter and Stasko were apparently standing under also didn’t show any signs of a strike.
>Martin said there’s no way of knowing for certain what transpired

Coroner ordered to cover it up.

>>2841752
yeah i guarntee you they were raped by bigfoot

>>2841742
No entry/exit wounds and tree unscathed.
Ground effect can still kill I guess.
Generally, in a lightning storm, you should try to keep your feet touching one another, if not balancing on just one, and place any dry electrically insulating materials underneath.
If you're soaked and your boots are soaked and you're standing on a soaked patch of ground with your feet apart, you will get a ton of current passing through you if lightning strikes anywhere nearby.
I am not sure statistically where the worst place is, other than high up, but I am guessing valley floors are actually pretty dangerous due to porous wet soils and rivers that can carry current a long distance. I understand electrogeology poorly desu, but I'm not sure its that well studied.

>>2841742
Damn, if only they’d learned how to tie knots.

>>2841787
yes they could have tied a knot in their colon to prevented being raped by bigfoot

>>2841788
this is why you have no friends

>>2841764
I got hit by ground effect while camping in the scouts, sitting on a dry pallet used as a tent base, twenty feet from a tree that got struck. The other guy was laying down and was thrown halfway out of the tent and was clinically dead for about a minute before CPR worked. Ground effect absolutely could have killed those guys especially if it traveled through any nearby roots.

>>2841840
Yes everything on 4chan is super serious and should be taken completelt seriously
and not at face value

>>2841900
Don't mind that other anon. His mother just took too much Tylenol while she was pregnant with him.

>>2841900
Anotheranon here, but act a faggot, get called a faggot.

>>2841955
but act?
that sounds pretty gay faggot?
you been taking tylenol

>>2841742
giga unlucky

>>2841201
you sure are familiar with that huh

>>2841238
>How the fuck did they only make it 2 miles in when they died?
lightning struck them

>>2841115 (OP)
does anybody know if they were ever found?

>>2844351
C'mon man, its not that long of a thread...
>>2841742

>>2844460
did they get an elk at least?

>>2844553
No, because they didn’t have any survival skill (like knot tying), which is why they died of a lightning strike. They should have watched more YouTube videos before hand.

>>2841124
Actually happened here in sweden, carbon monoxide poisoning. Died in their tent, veterans with 30+ years of outdooring

>>2841238
They probably got turned around dickhead lol. They could have walked 20 miles.

>>2841764
What you want is to avoid letting the current cross your chest. Putting your feet together has nothing to do with anything. That's fucking retarded.

>>2844648
This is why I never take the "experienced outdoorsman" nonsense seriously. ANYONE can still fall victim to natural forces or accidents.

I keep seeing cases like on that stupid Missing 411 show where they talk about what an amazing hunter and outdoorsman a person is, and when they show their picture, it's a carbon-copy of every trailer trash redneck that's been arrested for multiple DUIs and DV incidents in my hometown. A ton of dudes are just plain shitfaced the whole time they go "hunting," get dehydrated, and start making stupid mistakes. But because they "grew up hunting/in the outdoors," everybody says they're capable. Just because you've dodged probability this long doesn't mean that you're untouchable.

>>2841124
>Be me
>Honeymooning in Colorado
>Driving through the state to see the aspens and hike
>First night in Georgetown
>Take the little train tour with spergy guide with a speech impediment
>Drink at the brewery and try to get my wife pregnant
>Next morning go downstairs for free breakfast
>Two dudes in camo walk in
>EXCUSE ME WE GIT LOST ELK HUNTING YESTERDAY AND THE RANGER DROPPED US OFF HERE IS THERE ANYONE HEADED BACK TO DENVER WE COULD CATCH A RIDE WITH BEFORE WE PAY $150 FOR A TAXI?
>Babe let’s help them
>No
>Why?
>Theyre retarded, you don’t pick up hitch hikers in America, you made me leave my gun at home, and we’re going the opposite way, and they didn’t say please
I can excuse being a retard and an hours worth of inconvenience but not bad manners.

>>2846484
>You don't pick up hitchhikers in America
more like you don't go Hitchhiking in America, retard. Homeless/vagabonds are targeted by serial killers, they're not uberman serial killers

>>2846484
Why did you even make this post?

What a stupid fucking anecdote by a retarded cunt with a fat, stupid, ugly whore of a wife

>>2846387
truth nvke

>>2841133
>I bring 70+lbs of gear with me and most of it is water.
How much water are you bringing?

>>2841122
>>couldnt tie knots
Being able to make your own rope is so easy. I think that (especially if you live in a cold climate), people who love to be outdoors need to know how all you listed plus
>make your own rope
>identify edible mushrooms
>know some basic first-aid (how to make a splint, poultice, or know some local anti-bacterial remedies)

>>2841122
Once I was stranded in a mountain and had to make my own safe water from a stream, make a small shelter before it got dark, and eat a fuck ton of wild fruits and some plants. I was a retard, hiked too far, and didn't pack enough to safely make it back without dehydrating. It was a scary but memorable experience.
I've also been stranded on an island when a small boat of mine took on too much water and got wrecked. That was also comfy, I had some time so I got to make a fire, a small bench and shelter, and catch some fish. All I had were clothes, fishing tools, a knife, a water filter, and a lighter. The water filter came in handy lol.

>>2847566
How you gotted resQ 4m Isle?

>>2847567
It was an island in a giant lake. I was doing a group camping thing. Some friends looked for me when I didn't return to camp and eventually found me. Then as a joke they left me there a little longer. Honestly, if it was life or death I am a good enough swimmer to have probably escaped but it was fun. The mountain deal I probably would have died if I never found water.

>>2841122
Experienced in news articles always means that they just go out multiple times a year; a step above the average person who goes dayhiking in one national park a year maybe. Skill and time out above that level might as well be just the same level of experience to the average person because going out regularly at all is so far from the norm. You read news articles intended for the masses and are surprised when they appeal to the masses.

>>2841126
>>2841124
I don't know how anyone could get lost. I always know roughly where I am. It is the smaller landscape details that catch me out, finding myself on top of the bluff that I needed to be underneath, or droping too low and ending up in a gorge that I have to back track out of. But I know where tf I am, and know how to backtrack and correct my mistake. So I guess someday I could end up in a situation where I know where I am, but its the wrong place and fir whatever reason I can't get out, ill hit the button on my eperb and hopefully blow some Search and Rescue volunteers minds with how tf I ended up in such a stupid place.