Thread 512455876

watch me post this at the same time as three other people post one

also watch niggers beg for freedom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SuoPQV672PE

>>512455876 (OP)
>watch me post this at the same time as three other people post one
Not today, anon, I hit Refresh before I posted this time!

Only 2 scheduled parole hearings today, but we've got at least 3 revocations to start
And this revocation is going right to script - woman gets beat, calls cops, man gets revoked and woman recants

our first customer today decided he would rather risk another 8 years in prison rather than make a few calls and fill out a few forms. it didn't work out for him.

this guy apparently works at coca cola and cuts grass.

TYB

The start to this one was great. This sheboon saying hello to her angry kid kek

those neck tattoos speak highly of his character

this guy looks like he didn't do what they say he did

Good morning /lpbg/ and TYB. This fine upstanding citizen is about to learn how quickly making excuses gets him put back in the cage.

Good morning gentlemen

Lawdy me, this woman an her lil dindu. Hang 'em both

>you don't have to, it's in the report
lol prator

>falsified police report
those are powerful allegations

Dude is completely fucked and he doesn't realize it, because this bullshit probably has worked for him in the past

lol he literally doesn't know what supervision means in this context

Mammaboon in shambles.

GM and tyb

two more for the bingo card:
his sister was driving when she called into the zoom
his momma is bawling MUH BAYBUH

#NEVER FORGET

>>512455876 (OP)
What a fucking retard
>nb4 nigger doctor steals my wallet.

>>512456570
never

Aloha gents.
Bank got me my 40k cash, gonna go use it to pick up my boat today. Pretty stoked but stressed i dont have parking at my place i will have to park it somewhere else. can you park a boat on a street or will it result in my being on /HPBG/ one day?

>missed the first case
>scroll back
>"I gotta do all eight years?"
topkek
They're going to steamroll through these fuckers today

Tech guy doodling for us

>>512456678
i think they're probably burned out after yesterday and just want to get this week over with

>>512456619
Have (you) thought about parking the boat in water?

>>512456699
not as good as our resident artists but points for effort and welcome to the game tech guy

GM frens
>>512455979
>short day
Absolutely sad. Surely there are more niggers in jail

>>512456829
How'd that work out for the Titanic?

>>512456619
i don't know what the local ordinances are regarding parking a boat in the street but i do know that anything left on the street on a trailer can be dragged off by anyone with a trailer hitch.

>Zoning violation hearing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oi3FklfYDYU
This judge has been in a lot of viral videos but this looks boring as fuck

>>512456920
Buy the ticket, take the ride.

Backstreets back alright!

>>512456996
The job is very boring 99% of the time.

>>512457178
Everybody, we're back again
Watchin' parole with my frens

>>512457178
That legit looks like a 90s album cover

Hope he isn’t paying for this lawyer lmao

>voice warble
Lawyer is nervous, take a deep breath sir.

>>512457265
>>512457261
Gave me the same vibes as this old video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNdM8cFuOXg

>>512457261
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2yPZ5OZ4Ik

she looks like the lady in the bathtub in The Shining

>fought your own father over some dude
Fucking white trash niggers are something else

If the attorney really didn't get discovery, then they probably are opening themselves up to a whole bunch of trouble if they make a judgement today
I'm expecting them to either Do Not Revoke, or say "We'll get discovery to the attorney and reconvene at a later date"

>>512457651
that would be the smart thing to do under those circumstances. lets see if they do it.

OH GOD THE FUPA

this guy is a real winner

>>512457445
That's a good one. I was expecting it to morph into the v-tuber one.

He sounds like an Adam Sandler character

Dindu nutting

>>512457885
Nah that's the original one right there.

>if innocent, doesn't mean we'll let you out
WTF is Prator on about?

>>512457776
I'm so sorry

>hot mic
>dey need to open up dem door to circulate da air
I swear if I had to go to prison and have to listen to the ramblings of some country ass nigger bitch staff they'd have to keep me in solitary
I'm going after them on sight

>>512457984
just being arrested can be enough to get revoked if the board decides to. even if the charges are dropped or you are found not guilty. parole is solely at their discretion and if they feel like you didn't do a good enough job of avoiding trouble they can revoke just for that. dunno if other states are the same or not. it's pretty harsh.

>>512456619
When are you hosting all of us on a /LPBG/ luxury cruise?

>>512458208
>with Special Guest Speakers these two nigs

a driver, two silhouettes, and a sojourner
check, two drivers now.

Jessika's got some nice tits

>>512458520
She's pregnant allegedly

DARK NIGGA'S

>>512457984
>>512458183
>The committee may order revocation of parole upon a determination that:
>The violation of condition involves the commission of another felony, or misconduct including a substantial risk that the parolee will commit another felony, or misconduct indicating that the parolee is unwilling to comply with proper conditions of parole.

this is what wrecks all of the parolees that get their domestic violence charges dropped
and what is going to wreck this guy right now

>I SAAIID GOODMORNING
GM niggress!

shanda sounds like a fucking cartoon character

Showercap is being fed lines lmao

That camera angle makes her mouth look full monkey

>>512456829
the wait time for a slip is 3-5 years
>>512458208
come on out that would be fucking kino.
We'd all have to watch at like 3am though

>>512458690
GREAT MORNING

>>512458578
Looks like she does have a little bit of a baby bump
Nothing a good Falcon Punch can't fix

That was great

Why are they all yelling?
FUCK!

>>512458719
Hawaii really is paradise
too bad it's so expensive and liberal

how on earth is this a female

>>512458782
they all grew up using shitty obamafones with bad mics

>>512458719
Only the leeward side. the Braddahz on my side hold it down. They call the trannies in Honolulu "Mahu" we just call um fags

>>512458719
What kind of fish is that and are they tasty?

>accuses man of beating you while pregnant because you're petty and vindictive
>It was a lie ya'll oopsie gravy

help sirs what the fuck is he saying

>>512459002
he's trying to say he did everything he told the parole board he would do except get his truck driving license but he was on the waiting list for truck driver school

Get this bitch a job in the UN!


>>512458910
its a variety of trevaly, very tasty

>dat I sayz, dat I sayz, dat I sa--
T-t-t-today junior!

y de alway in the car? u cold get in an axadent!

>>512459026
As somebody who had a stuttering problem as a kid, I can sympathize
Also, Chaunte's driving, lawl

>>512459072
dubz and first court zoom auto accident

Jessika looks like she's a heavy drug user
That baby is fucked

>>512459092
Rolling for a collision

>>512459176
We're all frens today.

hmmm i don't seem to have any "GRANTED" pics

What's with these normal names?
We got 3 crackers coming up?

>>512459212
yeah the first thing that crossed my mind when i saw her in the light of day was "crack whore"

Her smile and optimized restored

morning alex

good morning

>>512459287
>Dickerson
we had one of those yesterday. but as anon hilariously pointed out, he dicked the mom not the son.

>>512459366
good morning! Will somebody scan this plz!

>>512459257
We need to come up with something good

>>512459257
i tried in the past

>>512459458
>british flag
>college grad telling the inmate "YOU LUCK TO YAS!"
>SWAT team standing by
granted pic temu edition lol
good effort anon

Lawd Is be free. Free at last!
Where all da white women at?

>>512459442
too low res unfortunately

N

>>512459657
page 10 maybe? lord knows there certainly aren't any around here.

>>512459777
absolutely kino ass digits on a top tier post

They forgot about this nigga

>>512460205
>They forgot about this nigga
Nah, they just went out for smokes
They'll be back soon, I'm sure

>>512460205
>25 minutes from now
>"Ay y0.... anybody here meh?"

HE TURNED WHITE

>>512460205
Pete must have delivered some snacks
Pete requests snacks: https://vocaroo.com/1amo1c1c6Z5b
Pete gets frustrated while buy snacks https://voca.ro/1fNyBtvXh8CS

was that some real time document blurring or just a compression glitch?

Did he almost say "shes dead"?

>>512460564
Good Lawd! It's a miracle!!

This midwit retard doesnt understand probable cause KEK
not lookin good for this sovereign citizen

>>512460629
background blur is a zoom feature

>>512460572
Classic

Discount Charles Manson is digging a ditch he won't get out of anytime soon

Dude is talking himself back into the cage. It would be funny if the castrated him though.

this guy should start his own law firm for homeless sex offenders

Yap, yap, yap

Wait.. did he just say castrated?

>Yeah I raped her but she was of age
>I rest my case

>>512461184
in louisiana judges can sentence kid diddlers who molest victims under 12 to surgical castration.

Mee-maw circling for the kill?

Statue 8 - section 9 - verse 10: states shut the fuck up

>>512461403
lol you could see it in their faces when he started answering the question with another "SECTION E STATES"

They ask a question and this nigga become Forrest Gump with his stories

>Ma'am I'm willing to get any documentations or assessments you need to keep me on parole
is this so hard to say

>>512461475
some people seem to exist just to complicate the obvious

Shelters require money
Especially male shelters

Based Prator

>>512461475
he was obsessed with being vindicated over finding what he thought was a flaw

>>512461403
Anon spoke, the Louisiana prison system listened! (Briefly)

damn he came close to going back

>>512461628
Hawaiianon here, I used to be a homeless bum in Seattle. The shelters are ALWAYS full because the lifers make their entire life revolve reserving the beds. it's fuckin disgusting. All you get as an honest bum is a hurricane blanket and a "good luck". I slept on cardboard outside the seahawks store most nights.

What an odd revocation

>>512461666
I know, Satan. I don't know how Meemaw didn't see through his bullshit. She is usually pretty good about that.

>>512461701
He was lucky the two Golden Girls were on the panel today. If it were someone like Chucky he would be cooked.

>>512461682
>>512461549
Damn I thought Meemaw was gonna revoke

>>512461802
she was takin' a chance on him
if he comes back she'll probably throw the book at him

I miss my nigga Alvin, I hope he is doing well. Imagine a board with Prator and Alvin on it

>>512461866
>>512461977
rolling for double 8's

>>512461762
A lot of ham and eggers think there are just these unlimited resources for the homeless and they're just not using them. Reality is there are so many barriers and other issues that prevent them for getting anything.
For most homeless women they have it easy, just some paper work, bureaucracy, and a waiting list and they can have a home via Section 8 within a month.
Food, clothing, etc too by private groups that take care of them.
Homeless men on the other hand like you said are shit out of luck.

>>512462026
>Imagine a board with Prator and Alvin on it
That would be amazing

>>512462129
homeless men should form mad max style gangs and raid liberal stores like REI and Dick's Sporting Goods for supplies

>>512462290
>"JUST LEAVE THE AIR MATTRESSES AND PUMPS ON THE SIDEWALK AND THERE WILL BE AN END TO THE HORROR"

>>512462398
spoken by Lord Hugh Homeless

>>512462129
Resources are being used, to line the pockets of charity admins.

>>512462290
i would become homeless to join

alex is back. good morning again alex.

What a Bellowend.

In case Louisiana anons here find themselves in legal trouble

>>512462555
For given to illegals
I'm still salty big cities were giving away money to illegal spics while American homeless were passed by

>terminate you
Holy fuck

>>512462555
trips of truth. there is a homelessness industrial complex right alongside the rehab industrial complex. "non profits" make a shitload of money "doing something".

don't think i've ever seen anyone TERMINATED before

smile and optimism restored

i like his 'high rise business' zoom background

bet it all on the Daily Double and won

Paid attorney vs. Free attorney

this fucker got the do not revoke any% record

>>512462920
>>512462942
next stop: Short Dog's house to watch Y0 MTV RAPS

>yes ma'am i'm not nanook
what

>>512462795
Absolutely, just another example of societal rot

Can I go to prison even though I refuse to do crimes?

"700 839" The rare 3 digit recall of the DOC #

Prator ignores the foid kek

>didn't report in for months
Fucking retard

>>512463520
Yeah this happened to a lot of our parole applicants. That's what they say, anyway, and I have no reason not to take their word for it.

>>512463624
it's amazing how stupid some of these people are.
>do i make a phone call, or do i go back to prison for years on end? oh well not like it's a big deal anyway....

>>512463520
Trust, they'll find a law you broke.

>>512463627
The justice system is too hard for people of black color.

>I reported to my officer but I never did
What?

Federal and state parole simultaneously. Impressive.

the real crime is forcing this man to operate in our convoluted legal system. we'd all be better off if he was running around in the African bush.

>>512463739
imagine what a confusing place the world must be for somebody like this

>>512463820
In the black world, this is called overachieving.

>>512463732
The real reason why they were kept in the fields. White's were protecting them from this complex system of rules we live under.

So, some niggers have this thing where they'll try to do right just once. And if anything impedes them they just give up.
Like if they have to pay a bill, if the website doesn't work they're like "Fuck it" and will then just let the overdue balance sit.
Then they're shocked if services get cut or whatever.
This is the same thing.
He claims he tried to check in but when some bitch told him to call a number later he was like "Shieeeeeet" and never followed up.

I'm curious what this guy did to get federal and state sentences in the first place

>>512463927
yeah it's sorta like that scene in Idiocracy where he gives up trying to explain why watering crops with Brawndo won't work and just says he can talk to plants and they told him they'd prefer water.

Working at chicken and something?

>>512464030
I am too

>>512463948
yeah some people are just looking for an excuse to not do shit. even when it's important shit that will keep their dumbass out of prison

>>512464079
Daiquiri

>>512464030
>>512464079
moving drugs in large quantities is a good way to get in trouble with both.

LOCK HIM UP PRATOR

Chicken and Dagger does not exist
He just made a restaurant up

This is injustice!

We haven't heard a "wut dat meen" in a little while.

>>512464218
bet they have Oliet Bang's on tap

>>512464218
https://voodoochickenanddaiquirisnola.com/
chicken and dagger would make a cool name for an inn in a fantasy setting tho

Oh that mush mouth nigger was saying Chicken and Daiquiris

>>512464263
we sorta did. the first guy went out asking
>DUZ DAT MEEN I GOTTA DU DA HOLE AYT YEERZ???

>>512463627
But they do crime shit. I want to go there but I’m not going to do anything illegal.

>>512464137
Ahh, thanks

Looks like your run of the mill fried food join but with worse decor

>>512464519
And more gunfire

>>512464519
I'm guessing that shit on the right is beans, but looks like shit mixed with puke.

>>512464398
>exploring the French Quarter
Oh my god, I don't have the pic but it's the one with the niggers looking down at french people in a sort of zoo style.

>>512464569
Red beans and rice?

>>512464569
looks like mashed potatoes and gravy

>>512464589
>exploring the French Quarter
just imagine the sights you'll see there!

>>512464681
It's red beans and rice

>>512464651
I think that >>512464681 is correct. Whatever it is, it's fucked.

>>512464569
Red beans and rice, and it can be delicious if done right. Popeye's is pretty good for a fast food version.

That spongy ass chicken
This is definitely drunk people food
Reheated frozen slop with a way too high price tag

faggot kid diddler
kill it with fire

Burn this gay "man".

>i don't know who she is ma'am
well that's a first for me

If you see fried pickles on a menu that's nigger territory for sure
Do not enter

>>512464949
I love Popeye's, except for the hockey pucks they call biscuits.

I don't hear a shred of remorse from this pederast

>>512464731
well mashed potatoes aren't on their menu so i guess it is rbr

this is the closest match i've found in their review pics

>>512464336
>>512464398
>>512464519
This is all making me more and more hope for a Cat 5 on the gulf coast this season just because the hurricane threads are comfy af

>>512465188
Fried pickles are delicious.

>YOUNGER AND TWO BOYS
WHAT THE FUCK

>>512465150
Looks like the hayball had the higher ground.

>>512465307
Is that the 9 year old boy?

>>512465224
I'm a thick boy I know my food when I sees em

was that an answer to the question that was being asked?

>Victims said you pulled the trigger but the safety was on
Holy fucking shit

>victim blaming
>no apologies
>got nothing to look forward to outside
I'm actually starting to believe he's throwing his own hearing so he can stay in prison and fuck more men

>Rapes two little boys at gunpoint

It just keeps getting worse, man.

so who the fuck was louise?

>>512465202
It's crazy how they went from real biscuits to that shit
And they ignore the people complaining because so many fat fucking hogs will gobble them down regardless of how bad they are

>>512465553
prisoner groupie

>be a miserable soul for the rest of your life
Damn

>>512465258
>This is all making me more and more hope for a Cat 5 on the gulf coast this season just because the hurricane threads are comfy af
Oh hell yeah. I am in Houston and I love /AHSG/. This has been a quiet season so far, but late August and early September are peak times, so hopefully soon.

>>512465641
well, given that he's into little boys i'd say she's definitely barking up the wrong tree with that one.

>>512465638
I started eating at Popeye's when I was in 7th grade and one opened up near us. The biscuits were so good then. I used to get extra biscuits with my chicken but now I give them to the dogs.

cupid? that's an unfortunate name for a molester

>Mr. Cupid can you hear me you're shaking your head
>shakes head, then nods

Another chomo with a gun?!

>>512466330
Sounds like a hannibal lecter villain name

the hot niece, gets 'em every time

>I hope she is doing fine
Meemaw is going to cook him over that statement

>pre pubescent
yeah that's a firing squad

>>512466483
Fucking kek

Uncle Touchy's Naked Puzzle Basement

Question anons: You just found out your scumbag brother fucked your 10 year old girl, do you call the cops or just grab the shotgun?

>>512465748
Don't you speak that into existence. Power infrastructure in the Houston area is half a step above 3rd world countries.

>>512466781
A shotgun is too quick
The chainsaw would be preferred

>>512466781
The police could link his disappearance or body to me, so I would beat him to an inch of his life, then call the cops on him. Once he goes to prison, I would be sure to let as many prisoners know just exactly what he did.

>>512466875
That'll get you messy, rent a wood chipper

It's been a pleasure, have a great day/night gentlemen.

>>512466845
I am pretty confident we won't get hit this year from a statistical standpoint. Beryl was such a near miss for me and I can't remember back to back hurricane strikes in my lifetime. What I don't understand are the yearly hard freezes we are getting. That is so unusual and it sucks because I have young avocado trees.

>>512467280
>the yearly hard freezes
obviously the climate is warming and we all need to ride bikes in 15 minutes cities to save the world

>>512467280
Hard freezes aren't uncommon, statewide freeze events are.

>>512467485
>obviously the climate is warming and we all need to ride bikes in 15 minutes cities to save the world
Of course. I was thinking back and I remember ~2012 when we had a super hard freeze. I was duck hunting in Matagorda Bay and the salt water had frozen about 15 feet from the shore. We picked up coolers full of brown trout that were flash frozen. The next hard freeze was 2020 and we have had one yearly since then.

>>512467628
It used to be pretty rare for Houston