Thread 512515260

>white male
>About to turn 26
>Dropped out of college twice already
>Can't focus on work, ability to talk deteriorated two years ago(acquired dysarthria) severe anxiety, brainfog and adhd
>Cant socialise and talk to girls due to dysarhtria, never had gf
>Hash addict since 16yo, quit hash and cigarettes cold turkey exactly 7months ago
>Porn addict, cant quit no matter what
>Do nothing everyday and night except sometimes chill with friends
>Free running sleep schedule
>Chronic pain
Basically ready to die, made a plan of jumping off a cliff in france, and before that just smoke hash again which is the only thing that gives me good feelings, and before that maybe using my last money to see more of the world
But the thought of my mom finding out that i an heroed stops me, the idea of ruining her life is just so fucked up to me, but also dont want to be a burden anymore
I guess im just venting, i have no idea what to do, im desperate for any solutions, miracle healers, anything
>Signed up for college again, told them my disabilities beforehand, will be CS again, might be worthless but better than most other majors, cant do engineering, math or medicine
>Often daydream about killing mudsharks and other race traitors, or joining jihadi groups and do domestic *******
But i really just wanna fucking kms to be honest, im just staying alive for others
What to do bros?

>>512515260 (OP)
it's over for us

stop acting like a victim
you are the master of your destiny

if you kys you won't be alive to witness the race war. if you just wanna die anyways just wait a bit more and die fighting for your race killing shitskins and jews.

>>512515260 (OP)
1st of all, this is a thread for >>/adv/, not pol.
>Can't focus on work, ability to talk deteriorated two years ago(acquired dysarthria) severe anxiety, brainfog and adhd
While not the same, I stutter like a mofo, been to the clown academy twice for attempting suicide and I was still able to work as a garbage man for 10y.
"Not being able to work, because my brain feel feel funny" is a reddit tier excuse.
I unironically think that a 8h job would solve a lot of your problems.

>>512515260 (OP)
>hash addict
damn bro i feel for you

>>512515260 (OP)

tl;dr

You're a worthless piece of shit nigger faggot.

Just hang yourself.

>>512515260 (OP)
You gotta do stuff outdoors. Keep active. Idk. Energy needs to be channeled somewhere or bad things happen

>>512515564
Whats the clown academy?
Thanks for taking me seriously

>>512515428
Very wholesome advice. Hope op takes it.

>>512515260 (OP)
Stop being a pussy. You're white, start a business.

>>512515260 (OP)
Dutch fren, in you courses the DNA of survival and ancient spirit to overcome any and all hardships. Our ancestors have overcome hardships unspoken and unimaginable. You owe it to every cell in your body to keep living, no matter what. There is nothing holier and more grand than a man overcoming his hardships. Alexander the Great died in his early 30s from Malaria.

>>512515260 (OP)
Good riddance when you kill yourself. Racists don't deserve any pity.

>>512515866
Dude, i cant even talk how can i start a biz

>>512515808
Mental hospital.
Also the worst think to do is to sit at home and feel sorry for yourself.

>>512515869
Fren, I know our DNA is is precious, but just surviving wouldnt make a difference for us
I'd rather give my life taking a few liberal overlords with me

>>512515866
I'm white. what kind of business should I start? I have no real skills but can read and write english.

>>512515906
Think about it like this; you were born in a country where you still get to live a fairly comfortable life despite your circumstances. You can find a way to overcome it and build a microcosm for yourself to exist in.

>>512515940
I know bro, but I just feel so fucking stuck physically, I work out everyday n shit but i cant talk and interact with people, its not that i dont have the motivation, i just have no clue how to move forward anymore
Hope ur good

>>512515906
But you can get a menial physical job.
>builds a routine
>possibily of becoming buddies withmsome coworkers
>self-eestem will grow

>>512515260 (OP)
you're not a burden, thats something all depressed people think. You will feel better after taking better care of yourself and then helping out family more. There are too many psyxhopaths out there so people who feel stuff like you have to live on. Don't worry, wheen the good Lord calls you, you will be ready, old, and tired

>>512515260 (OP)
>jumping off a cliff in france
Why? Don't you guys have cliffs in the Netherlands?

>>512516000
Talking to people isn't the pinnacle of human existence. For many it is a necessity. We simply live in a time where it is beneficial to be social. Five borders to your East your ability to socialize is completely useless. What I mean is there is nothing wrong with you just because you don't find into a social system highly specific to this era. Do seek medical help to meet the bare minimum requirements, but don't look for purpose where your body and mind can't find it because we are all not the same.

>>512516000
>but i cant talk and interact with people,
There was a time in my early 20s, where I was literally unable to communicate with people because of my stutter, which made me hate myself.
But I started working as a garbage man and it slowly build up my self-confidence and self-esteem. Meet some cool coworkers, startet hanging out with them, met a girl through one of those coworkers and so on...
Just move in one direction and din't shut yourself in at home. It's gonna benA LOT harder to make changes in your 30s.

>>512515260 (OP)
Microdose psilocybin

>>512516178
don't fit perfectly into a social system*

>>512515428
tpbp

>>512515260 (OP)
Sound similar to me desu
>turned 26 recently
>dropped out no plans to try again
>getting high is my comfy happy moment
>thought about suicide alot
>loner for the most part
>decided to keep living because fuck it I’ve already invested too much
>wonder why im even alive, often think “how much longer before i can just pass away in my sleep”

Yeah don’t want to bother mom either but I just hope my financial investment turn out okay so I can get agency and that the horrible pain in my body soon resolves itself

It’s okay to have a couple of copes
I kind of want to quit porn but I just realized there’s healthy ways to deal with lust (cultivation practices) but I can’t really meditate with a piece of my brain being under physical pressure due to childhood injuries and growing crooked

All in all patience is a virtue and everybody is a sad clown coping at their own cosmic jokes anyways.
Give shrooms a whirl before you decide to an hero anyways.
What’s scarier?
a jump off a cliff or a heroic dose in a dark room?

Oh before that maybe read into 40k psychic lore for a nice backdrop

>>512515564
I’m currently at a clown house for assisted living because i had a funny oopsie in relation to aforementioned issues
It’s easier when you realize you’re in a corny horror movie that people are playing out slowly

>>512515260 (OP)
You like the aesthetic, your thread pic says it all, you are a faggot OP

>>512516258
>I’m currently at a clown house for assisted living
Open or closed type?

>>512515260 (OP)
Don't kill yourself. Just keep living in case it get better. Why give the Jews an easy tiny victory and off yourself for their sake? Just keep existing so you're at least one more goy that didnt go peacefully into the night. The way I figure it is that if you're at the point where you're prepared to self-terminate, you should just keep living to see what happens. You have nothing to lose at that point anyways. Take your issues and try to leverage it for welfare. Suck every benefit and penny you can get from the system. Don't give them the win of your own death, that's bullshit.

>>512515428
This

>>512516178
It is here, and i am failing, i should be locking down and impregnating a white woman, and if i dont ive failed
>>512516180
Good to hear, thanks for that advice
How are woman not disgusted by you not being to talk? (Not sarcastic)
>>512516191
Will try thanks
>>512516258
Yes its hard bro i hope ur good
I just wanna find a prowhite dutch group, not some cucked boomer pvv shit, but real men who work together
>>512516177
It's called the Netherlands for a reason fren

>>512515260 (OP)
The first thing you should know is the past doesn't exist. It's only your memories of the past that persist, the actual past has gone. Those things you think are super important (like memories of past failures, they're only important to you). Even if other people remember them they're not spending all day thinking about stuff like this. In fact the truth is that most people don't think about you much at all. That's not to blackpill you, that's to remind you that things you're beating yourself up over, other people actually don't care as much as you think.

There are sometimes uses in mulling things over but if you're finding yourself living there, replaying past events then there is diminishing returns.

Why do we go there? Why do we use labels for ourselves? Make excuses why we can't do things? Because living in the past means we don't have to make the more difficult choices in life. Where the outcomes are uncertain. Where we know there is a chance of failure.

But the past, since it's already happened, is the perfect place to return to isn't it?

But it's also incredibly unfulfilling. Even the good parts, if you have good memories you will also notice they'll fade or just not be as potent as before.

My dad lived with extricating pain since he was 23. He had to have many surgeries. Doctors told him he may not walk again. Some of the surgeries they knew would limit his mobility forever but would reduce the pain. He tried everything. He couldn't return to his job that he'd prepared for. That he built a life around. He had financial problems due to lack of income from being in hospital all day.

Confined and bed ridden the only productive thing he could do was read. So he did. He re-invented himself. Found a new line of work. Got his shit together. Not once did I ever hear him make excuses or cry about the fact he still can't move his elbows or walk properly. He just gets on with it.

>>512515260 (OP)
Meditation. Do the Gateway Tapes. Learn to master your consciousness. Kriya Yoga too.

>>512516396
How do i find people who want to f*ght the system with me like discord groups
Im willing to give my life for the cause and like u said i have nothing to lose

>>512515260 (OP)
>>512516258
Are the Dutch okay?

Want a Tarot reading?

>>512515260 (OP)
>severe anxiety, brainfog and adhd
So you are a woman.

>>512516478
>How are woman not disgusted by you not being to talk? (Not sarcastic)
As I've said, having a job, made me more confident and my stutter has gone way down during the past decade. One ex even said sne founds my stuttering very cute. I was baffled as hell.

Look, I don't now if your condition is neurological or if it can be at least partly healed, but speech is far from everything regarding sexual communication.

OP I don't think you should an hero, and you should try making friends via vidya if you're unable to irl. I personally recommend Overwatch 2. An heroing isn't a noble thing to do and overall doesn't diminish your unhappiness. If you're adamant on ending or ruining your life, I'd recommend to at least take down a brown migrant with you. Although leftists are part of the social/cultural issue, I think it's more important to instill fear into brown migrants. You mog every one of these brownies to oblivion and descend from great ancestors, don't give up, hang onto life. Their goal is to create unbearable environments for white men especially, and you cannot let them win.

>>512515906
I am starting a business in the Netherlands making thermal camouflage. Do you know how to sew?

>>512515260 (OP)
You simply need to stop mastubrating and watching porn. It's the cause of you severe anxiety faggotry and hash addiction. If you canovercome this you'll be a new man. Otherwise, legit kys. It's either or, my man. No point in wallowing in your own stupidity forever. End porn addiction or perish. Best of luck.

>>512515260 (OP)
>CS

Lmao

Hopeless

>>512516707
Its physical on my part, getting CFR in literally 30 minutes, omw there now, hoping it will make a difference
godspeed anon thx for ur advices

>>512516512
You are the culmination of stories you tell yourself. Tell yourself that you're a victim and there's absolutely nothing you can do. And you will start to believe that. Tell yourself that there is no hope and you won't bother to look for it, because you've already decided it's not there.

We spend a lot of our lives in our own heads. We are aware of the damage putting bad things into our bodies will do to us. But we don't pay as much attention to the kind of thoughts or words we use to describe our situation.

The truth is that the narrator in your head holds a lot more sway over the outcomes in life than you realise. You can reinvent yourself at any time by telling yourself different things and by starting a different story.

I'm not telling you to lie to yourself, the opposite. Start to be honest with yourself in a way that isn't trying to set yourself up for failure. So you should tell yourself you're going back to college, it might not work out again but you're going to give it your best effort. That last part is crucial. Start focusing on the future. Be realistic and try to visualise and talk about what you're going to do. Accept that there are risks and downsides but that if you never took any risk whatsover you wouldn't even get out of the bed in the morning or even go down some stairs. It's not a way to lead any life, even one that has limitations. In fact, if you know you have such limitations the opposite strategy makes more sense. There's nothing wrong with a little risk taking, so long as you do it in a calculated way. Pros and cons, that sort of thing.

Most of the time it's never the thing itself that's bothering you, it's fixating on things that are outside your control and looking for excuses not to try because of fear of failing. It's okay if college doesn't work out again. It might not be for you. That's not the end of the world it just means you need to take another path in life.

If it's not going to kill you, don't worry about it.

>>512516532
Why dont you go do something useful instead of thinking ur gonna be a big hero.

>>512515974
Identify a problem that people have, and think of a solution to that. If you aren't creative start drop shipping chinese junk to women and advertise it on tiktok and youtibe shorts.

>>512516633
Sure why not
>>512516597
Our women are the worst coalburners of Europe, so no, by definition we are not ok as a people

>>512516791
What is CFR?

>>512516759
No but i can learn how to
Im down

>>512516858
They put a balloon in your sinuses and blow it to free cranial bones that are stuck
Its mostly a thing people do as a last resort for cranial issues

>>512516791
>>512516858
I also wonder.

>>512516886
What is your email/contact?

>>512515974
mobile oil change. advertise on craigslist and put business cards on car windshields. its easy to learn just by watching youtube videos. charge like $80, which is actually a lot cheaper than most places like jiffy lube or a dealership would cost. drive to peoples houses and either use an oil extractor (costs like $70) or drive their car up a mobile ramp. everyone complains how expensive oil changes are now. their margin is your opportunity.
another option is unclogging drains. just buy a snake at harbor freight for like $150. call landlords and property management companies and tell then if a tenant has a clogged drain to call you first instead of a plumber who is going to charge over $100. do it for like $60. it takes seriously two minutes to put the snake down the drain and pull out the wad of hair. if you cant do it, just say theyll need a full-service plumber. dont let people hassle you about the gay mafia-style licensing shit.

>>512516515
Will check it out thanks

>>512516919
Session or qtox work for you?

>>512516532
That's a good way to get into fed territory. I do not advocate for doing anything illegal or violent, and I definitely do not advocate interacting with people on Discord. Organize politically and exercise your rights within the legal bounds of the law.

>>512516913
Cranial facial release

>But the thought of my mom finding out that i an heroed stops me
And ur dad? Other family?

>>512516833
You are demoralised brother. It's not over yet. If it was actually over they wouldn't need to push out so much propaganda to try to turn people. Do you see things like the restrictions on the internet in the UK? Would they be doing that if they still thought they had things under control. They will pump out propaganda trying to convince you that they've got this but if you look at examples in history, the USSR was cranking out propaganda that it was all good right up until the regime fell.

My ex was Dutch and she was an autist. Definitely not a coalburner. Kinda racist and she really hated Indians. More than me. Which is saying a lot because I hate them too. Don't an hero. Just know that there are evil forces in this world that would revel in something like you doing that and the pain it would cause people who care about you. Keep living and make difference despite those evil forces man. If you have to run on spite for now, do it.

>>512517009
No idea what those are.
>>512517019
Correct. Anyone pushing you to commot acts of violence online is likely a federal agent.

Hey buddy. I can empathize with you and I'm in a similar situation where life has become filled with hardship. I've failed multiple times in college too. In the beginning I had a self esteem problem where I felt like I was less of a man, I was picked on viciously at school but didn't realize that everyone goes through that and there wasn't anything wrong with me in particular. I'm prone to depression and social withdrawal. I'm in my 30s now and I've developed a bad drug habit that I let spiral out of control and I'm now dependent on fentanyl which we have available here in the USA at any hour. That's when my problems went from just social or emotional to existential, I lost all my material things, all the money I had, I went hungry, have been hospitalized a couple times and it all culminated in a failed suicide attempt several weeks ago. Like you I contemplated it but always said I would never commit suicide because of the toll it would take on my parents, but it all became too much and in a moment of selfishness and egged on by some voices I was hearing I tried to end myself with an extension cord. Luckily I failed and have another shot at things. I pray to the Lord again for the first time since being told how to do so as a child, and I go to alcoholics anonymous and see people there who have gotten themselves right, so I know it can be done now I have to do it. But it isn't easy or straightforward.

>>512515260 (OP)
swan dance. like your picrel

>>512515260 (OP)
If any man believe on Jesus Christ he will be saved
There is no reason to kill yourself

>>512517117
Dont really care about his liberal ass and the gay upbringing he gave me which led to many pains in my life

>>512517186
Messaging app, easy to set up, no phone number needed
Can you do it?

>>512517230
Godspeed

>>512516965
Please, really do this. Maybe I would have already killed myself if it wasn't for it.

>>512516512
>>512516796
Wise words.

>>512516350
Open
Basically free but I’m sure if I get too wacky they’ll toss me in the pen “for my own good”
Which all in all isn’t that bad but I can’t deal with their pill bs when I’m sane and they are crazy but insist I’m having a psychosis

It’s whatever
I kinda figured out how my reality works so I’m content if I can just manage the focus to meditate

>>512515260 (OP)
Don't do it man things get better.
Stop using social media and start living life without looking at the phone and TV.
Digital detox helps

>>512515260 (OP)
>>512516833
I asked how you can get back on track in life
IV of Wands reversed
Death reversed
The High Priestess
Right now you are feeling a lack of success, stagnation, and disappointment with the past. That is the Four of Wands reversed. Death reversed shows that your inability to let go of the past is what is keeping you in this negative frame of mind, but that also shows that changing your mindset is the key to being free of those bad feelings, which means letting the past rest. The High Priestess says that you should listen to your intuition and instinct. Try to look to the universe for signs of what path you should do.

Let go of the past and focus on your personal relationship with the divine. That will bring you to a better place.

>>512517230
Your president and his entire administration literally fuck children and then dismember and burn them on an altar to Satan just like jews do because they are literally kabbalist kike antichrist dogs

>>512517552
>I’m content if I can just manage the focus to meditate
Based and consciousness pilled

>>512515260 (OP)
I am in a similar boat but have resolved to go on. Because quite simply with life there are possibilities. In death there are none. Anon you can still be off services to you race. There are many illegals in your country. Do "something" at night any it. Or open an abortion clinic illegally of course and focus on browns.

>>512517359
I'm not downloading an app. You should look into something you can make a business around. Easy markets. Military larpers/ Ukraine war soldiers or women. You can drop ship to women easily. Just target their nostalgia and love of spending, I saw one dropshipper selling chinese flower wineglasses and saying eachone was inspired by a different disney princess.

You need to change perspective. You were Born into a Western society during peace Times, no war, food and water, shelter, entertainment. I personally feel grateful not be Born in 1677 or in india. Eventho i am in a similar Situation as you are. Social anxiety, cant work because of it, poor, no friends.

>>512515428
any day now

drug addicts are so disgusting