Anonymous
(ID: hTv8Kynj)
8/16/2025, 9:23:26 PM
No.513221933
>>513222350
>>513222356
>>513222903
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>>513223788
>>513224718
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>>513230702
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>>513234275
What's the point?
I'm a 46 year old father to a Level 3 Non-Verbal daughter who is 11. She will use a letterboard and an AAC device, but only for single words and generally only to request items. We've tried ABA, S2C, OT, PT, ST, and more meds than I can name. She's not toilet trained. Daily meltdowns or multiple meltdowns. These meltdowns are violent and destructive. Shattered windows, broken TVs, destroyed drywall. Bites, kicks, pinches, headbutts. And sleep dysregulation continues to be a struggle. Combine this with my 3 year old toddler son who is showing all signs of having ASD himself (formal diagnosis forthcoming), I have to ask....
What's the point? My daughter is never going to live a meaningful life. My life is going to be one where I get my ass kicked on a daily basis and have to pretend its all okay - usually on 3 hours of sleep each night. No friends. No life outside of raising this child. Even my job is work from home and independent, because I have to be there to handle the meltdowns.
A few weeks ago I had a heart attack and required a quintuple bypass. I've been back home 3 weeks and it's just a horrible, violent, sleepless environment. I wish I'd died on the table during surgery and don't see any reason to keep doing this. I'm not getting the recovery I need and am pretty much back to full parent mode after 2 1/2 weeks (instead of the full 3 month recovery) because my wife absolutely cannot handle it on her own. My daughter is never going to have a meaningful life. She's just going to continue being a violent, demanding, person that holds us all prisoner.
My wife and I love each other very, very much - but my recent bitterness has really gotten to her and I get that. But, whether it's her fault or not, I fear I've come to hate my daughter.
I'm a 46 year old father to a Level 3 Non-Verbal daughter who is 11. She will use a letterboard and an AAC device, but only for single words and generally only to request items. We've tried ABA, S2C, OT, PT, ST, and more meds than I can name. She's not toilet trained. Daily meltdowns or multiple meltdowns. These meltdowns are violent and destructive. Shattered windows, broken TVs, destroyed drywall. Bites, kicks, pinches, headbutts. And sleep dysregulation continues to be a struggle. Combine this with my 3 year old toddler son who is showing all signs of having ASD himself (formal diagnosis forthcoming), I have to ask....
What's the point? My daughter is never going to live a meaningful life. My life is going to be one where I get my ass kicked on a daily basis and have to pretend its all okay - usually on 3 hours of sleep each night. No friends. No life outside of raising this child. Even my job is work from home and independent, because I have to be there to handle the meltdowns.
A few weeks ago I had a heart attack and required a quintuple bypass. I've been back home 3 weeks and it's just a horrible, violent, sleepless environment. I wish I'd died on the table during surgery and don't see any reason to keep doing this. I'm not getting the recovery I need and am pretty much back to full parent mode after 2 1/2 weeks (instead of the full 3 month recovery) because my wife absolutely cannot handle it on her own. My daughter is never going to have a meaningful life. She's just going to continue being a violent, demanding, person that holds us all prisoner.
My wife and I love each other very, very much - but my recent bitterness has really gotten to her and I get that. But, whether it's her fault or not, I fear I've come to hate my daughter.
