Thread 514176645

Anyone here have a wife?

Free food when she cooks, get to grab her ass or boobs any time of day, tells you she wants to suck your penis and lets you coom all over her face whenever you want. This is kind of based

>>514176645 (OP)
is this your coomface cookwife?

>>514176645 (OP)
I wanna fuck the christmas cake.

>>514176645 (OP)
Sounds awesome
And there is surely nothing else that is bad or costly with this in mind, surely

>>514176645 (OP)
>Free food when she cooks
It's not free because you pay for it

>>514176645 (OP)
That is the most plasric chink ive ever seen, is it ai or did someone slather her in vaseline

>>514176645 (OP)
anyone else single?
>get to do whatever you want whenever you want
>don't have to explain yourself to anyone
>you can spend your money on whatever you want
>she doesn't try to pressure you into giving up "dangerous" hobbies like motorcycles and guns
>you don't have to ask for permission to engage in shenanigans with the lads
>you can fart in your own bed
>no one gets angry when you leave the toilet seat up
>you never have to watch any gay movies or tv shows
>no in-laws who hate your guts for penetrating their family member with your throbbing member

>>514176645 (OP)
>"free food"
That you pay for.

>>514176645 (OP)
>have a wife
gay

>>514176645 (OP)
Sage this bait thread. OP you must be retarded or trolling to think marriage is anything like the fantasy you have described.

>>514176645 (OP)
Every time I meet someone's wife she's fat and gross.

>>514177129
It pretty much is for me. She has bad gag reflex so she won't swallow, but she'll take a load on her face, her tits, anywhere basically. Do you really believe it's difficult to score a basic wife?

no, i'm trvcel

>>514176645 (OP)
>inb4 a thousand post about how marriage is a sham
If you cant control your woman its because she doesnt respect you. If she doesnt respect you its because youre passive and beta. The friends I have with solid marriages are in shape, dominant, and act like men.

>>514177939
the power that a man had in a traditional marriage have been taken by the state. The state and the woman have all the power and you have nothing.

>>514176645 (OP)
>get to grab her ass or boobs any time of day

Nobody tell him

>>514176645 (OP)
Porn has rotted your brain.

>>514176645 (OP)
Ask me how I know you’re not married

>>514177535
yeah bro they do, the board is full of kissless virgins pushing 40. A bunch of rejects who sat around doing suicide streams on /b/ 20 years ago and the only thing that's changed for them is being on the verge of homelessness since their moms are nearly dead.
I've given up talking about relationships and marriage on this board with anyone in a serious way.
go try to make a thread about the topic and make it personal, you'll see what I mean.

>>514176645 (OP)
Not gonna lie, I wish I had a wife now. Applying for apartments and getting rejected constantly for being a gaijin kinda sucks. fr fr

>>514176645 (OP)
Then she reports all of that shit you did as rape at the end of the marriage, tells all your friends and family. You stay on my couch paying me $250cdn each month and the rest of your money to child support/alimony. Then I find you swinging from a tree in the woods near Fujisan when you fail to show up after a couple of weeks.

>>514178818
>tells all your friends and family
this part, but unironically. Women are always keeping a catalog of shit you did while you were with them so they can weep about how abusive you were and how traumatized she is from your time together once you break up.

>>514176645 (OP)
I need a hot stripper wife

>>514176645 (OP)
None of those things are true thougheverbeit.

>>514178655
This board specifically is full of bots and shills. I'm probably one of only a handful of real organic posters left and I've been through 2 marriages already. Women are easy...too easy infact.

>>514178720
Japanese women are ez

>>514178753
Mods ban this MtF

>>514176645 (OP)
I have a couple of women that would marry me tomorrow. They both want children. One is mentally unstable and exciting, the other is a trad but a bit boring. I secretly want the mental woman, but she will ruin my life. I secretly respect the trad, she would make a good wife and mother, but the thought of spending the rest of my life with her doesnt thrill me with joy. A part of me wants to die in my sleep, rather than grow up

>>514179039
Sounds like you're the problem here, not the women.

>>514179085
Well I'm the problem in the sense I don't want to grow up. But one woman definitely is mental, and one woman definitely is a bit boring.

>>514179000
I know, but no way my sex friend would sign my lease you nigger monkey. Gotta have a wife for that.

>>514176645 (OP)
Yeah I got a wife. It's like you say but a little more complicated. A good wife will do those things so long as you hold up your end and be a good husband who put her first.

>>514178956
imagine the smell

>>514176645 (OP)
That's a man

>>514176645 (OP)
Japanese women are all the same person

>>514179640
>Gotta have a wife for that.

So get one then instead of whining on 4chan. You could be balls deep in Tomiko right now after she just signed your new lease for a spacious Meguro apartment

>>514179185
Savages. Would be nice if they stayed in their own containment countries

>>514176645 (OP)
fuck you

>>514178212
>>514178449
This.

>>514178753
2 hits, not bad

>>514178753
That's a sharp blade.

>>514178956
With body image/daddy issues.

>>514179039
Marry the trad, you fool. You bring the excitement to her.

>>514178753
I would totally buy this braindance

>>514176645 (OP)
>coom all over her face
I married a swallower

>>514178449
sorry your wife sucks

>>514176645 (OP)
why would you want to coom on your wife's face?
that's what whores are for
the only place you should be cooming on your wife is in her womb

>>514176645 (OP)
>tells you she wants to suck your penis and lets you coom all over her face whenever you want

I remember my first week of marriage.

Enjoy it while it lasts.

Good luck with that after you have kids

You dont understand
Once youre married she stops pretending to enjoy sucking your dick

>>514181254
>>514181308
>>514181316
dicklets who don't know how to paranoid max
you're supposed to tell her constantly about all the women who keep the trying to fuck you

>>514176923
Here's how you can tell that's a japanese and not a chinese. The truck behind her in the background didn't run her over or explode.

>>514178212
When I want to have sex, I just pick my wife up and carry her to bed. She always goes along with it and laughs on the way.

>>514176645 (OP)
My wife wants to be cum in not cum on, but ya everything else is how to describe it.

>>514181509
Thats right give her an excuse to cash out and go back to the cock caroussel lol

Jesus is my wife. He has been sexually abusing me. He controls my financial situation so I can’t escape.

>>514179039
See: >>514180542
>A part of me wants to die in my sleep, rather than grow up
Die to that part my fren. Give the trad a baby, you will love it.

>>514181861
>cash out
not hiding your assets in off-shore accounts/mummyss name/crypto
ngmi

>>514182149
Thats fake.

>>514176645 (OP)
It is. Marriage is one of the few things I did right in life. Marriage is underrated around here, but I'm starting to think this is an incel board that says they're MGTOW to pretend they have a choice in the matter. I don't think more than half of /pol/ could get or keep a GF if they tried.

>>514179187
Boring just means a clean palette; to which you are obliged (offered by her, even) to dress with whatever flavor of sexual wisdom you wish to impart unto her. The other woman, however, has been poorly season and spoilt. Can't fix crazy.

>>514176645 (OP)
How is the food free, nigga

>>514178720
Go back

>>514176645 (OP)
Until she decides she's bored of you and takes you to the cleaners. Then you'll see how "based" being married is.

>>514176645 (OP)
she is korean tomodachi, 99% plastic

>>514176645 (OP)
Yes it is awesome, blow jobs on tap pretty much.

>>514176645 (OP)
Mine is 10 years my junior. She is grabbing my dick all the time. I'll often be woken up by her jacking me off

>>514176645 (OP)
my wife is a pillow princess, she only wants cum in one place :(

>>514178753
0 archive results.. whats the story on this new gore?

>>514176645 (OP)
Married since 2017 ask me anything.

>>514176645 (OP)
Yeah it's honestly pretty great. Especially if you're good in bed.
Learn to lay pipe on your wife and you'll never have a hard day ever again.

>>514176645 (OP)
nazis

>>514178095
>178095
ive been with the same woman for years. i dont need the state to have authority.

>>514176995
>I want to stay a boy forever
>Help I'm being genocided

>>514176645 (OP)
Why the long face?
>sluuurpslopshlupshlupshlup

>>514176995
The fart argument is too strong for me to ever change my ways
I also like to sit in the dark by myself and don't have a TV

>>514183796
I dutch ovened my ex once and it is, by far, the angriest I have ever seen a human being before.

>>514176645 (OP)
No. I cannot think of comprehend anything gayer than having a wife. You have to say "i love you", "i can't live without you". Men don't act like that.

The only guy on 4chan who has a wife that is nice is this anon >>>/ck/21547566

>free food
Your money pays for it
>get to grab her ass or boobs any time of day
lol
>tells you she wants to suck your penis

You haven't been in a longterm relationship with a Woman in a while, have you? You get into a relationship because you love them and want to take on the world with them. If your wife is completely submissive, your children will not be in a healthy environment. Your wife and you need to be on the same wavelength to raise your children. Sure, you may not agree on everything, sometimes your Wife makes dinner, sometimes you're on grill duty (only fags hate this). But you both want the best for your children and would kill literally anyone to secure a proper life for them. I hope you meet a wonderful Woman and have a long, love-filled life with her.

>>514184252
kek i never say this shit
as a guy you're expected to NEVER show any emotions and sure as fuck I dont

even when she's gobbling my cock, the most I give her is "good job" a pat on the head

Please don't objectify Asian Women.
They are more than that.

>>514176645 (OP)
no im 5'8"

>>514184365
they really arent
my ex wife was chinese and she would wake me up sucking my dick and just tell me to go back to sleep while she was sucking and sucking

>>514176995
I'm in a relationship and don't have any of that shit. And her mom wants me to knock her up. Toilet seat thing excluded, but if you leave the toilet seat up you're a retard anyways

>>514176995
whatever helps you cope

>>514182353
>Marriage is underrated around here
No, just the legal contract of marriage here in the USA. I'm sure everyone here knows a few men who got cleaned out hard by their ex wives. My brother is one of them.

Yet these horror stories mostly happen with American women or those who moved here and got indoctrinated by social media. The happiest men I know are the ones who married foreign women and moved to their country, or if they are here at least they didn't spend a lot of time single to learn how to be a roastie.

>>514184331
I don't really believe what i said there. It's a fuentes quote.

I've never had a woman tell me they love me

>>514176645 (OP)
Married with 2 kids. Sex 2.5 times a week. Makes tasty Latina food. Comy sundays at church. 10/10.

>>514181608
it's also a nip truck

Based expat anon. My girl is Japanese and I've never been so happy with anybody in my life. It is nonstop affection nearly 24/7. I imagine that will fade with time as the honeymoon phase wares off, but I plan to be in for the long haul. I've never met somebody so attracted to me before.

>>514176995
I dont have any of those issues except farting and toilet seat

>>514184906
You should do bum sex with her. Asians love it up the bum because then they can’t get pregnant.

>>514176995
What's the fucking girlie obsession with the toilet sit anyway? I never understood.
I have to put it up to pee and you have to put it down yourself for your own pee what's the fucking issue you retarded roasties?

>>514176645 (OP)
>Anyone here have a wife?
Nope , Im very ugly. Still I have friends that are married. It seems nice. Maybe in another life

>>514176645 (OP)
Sex is for virgins.

>>514184424
Cool, and then she became your ex because you suck ass as a husband.

>>514185308
men are supposed to do the dirty jobs, not women. They want you to touch the toilet seat twice so they don't have to touch it once.
I just pee with the seat down.

>>514185413
You seem like a beta cuck. You should murder all your friends with a spear. Spears are very trusty weapons, if you invite them all over you can corner them with a spear and stab them all. Youll never get to stab somebody with your penis though, only chad can

>>514183953
>I also like to sit in the dark by myself
Your power level is lightyears ahead of mine.

>>514184575
My brother got mindraped by /pol/fags and alt-right horseshit, speedran into marriage with the first dumb cunt who showed interest to him on an online dating site. Got married at some tiny church with no one else there, has two kids, hates her now because she's a manipulative narcissist (wore a fake crown at a restaurant because it was her birthday, begging for gibs) and last I heard he was suicidal since losing his government programming job he worked hard to get (for her) due to DOGE cuts.

I read the Gen X boomers LARPing here and just chuckle

>>514176645 (OP)
>tells you she wants to suck your penis and lets you coom all over her face whenever you want.
That’s not what it’s like having a wife anon.

>>514176645 (OP)
I'm married with 2 kids. Been with my wife for 12 years. Yeah, its nice. Gives you purpose and all. We have sex 1-2x a week typically. Kids really put a damper on that because good sex is spontaneous and its hard to be spontaneous when you have toddlers and preschoolers running around, not to mention having to work.

When I was single, I was a giga chad. Had 3 girls in rotation who knew about each other. That was fun for its own reasons, but also a different part of my life. I still fantasize about those days, but one cant be forever young and that stuff gets boring too, actually far quicker than married life.

My wife is a bad cook though and I'm an excellent cook, so she does all the chores and kid stuff instead. I work and cook mostly.

>>514184424
How often?

>>514185855
My friends are pretty nice , stabbing them is not a nice thing to do to them.

>>514176995
My wife doesn't care what I do for hobbies at all but she did say no more mountain climbing.
She bought me a 5090 as a gift and lately she has been even been encouraging of me getting bigger and better fireworks

>>514186169
Your friends cum inside girls butts and they will never let you do it to them. Theyre not nice at all, you should spear them and rape them after

>>514185467
She's my ex because like all women she got old and needed to be replaced with a new mode, retarded simp.

>>514186098
Few times a week. Eventually had to ask her to stop because my dick hurt all the time from being sucked on.

>>514183442
That video is at least a decade old.

>>514186258
I dont have the desire to ejaculate into mens rears. You dont seem like a friendly person.

>>514176645 (OP)
>get to grab her ass or boobs any time of day, tells you she wants to suck your penis and lets you coom all over her face whenever you want. This is kind of based

now realize a woman will end up making you hate every one of those things in the end
really comprehend that