>>514800230
First reality shattering event was in gymnasium, I were 15 yo. I had crush on a girl I knew and were afraid to ask her out (I was raised bluepilled in single mother household). After football training I were going back home with my friend who had handsome face (I am pretty mid myself, even low tier mid. when looksmaxed and on low bf btw.) and was good 10cm taller than me at that age, we both were fit and a bit muscular due to, well, being active all our lives. He knew about my crush and he told me that we can both message her atm and simply start talking, he'd act as my wingman, you know the drill. And we did.
He had the same level of relation to her as me, yet her treatment towards him was completely different. He got a date, I got told by her that her head hurts and she wants to sleep.
It made me pursue all the redpill content, blackpill was no such a thing back then. It was eye-opening and I hate women now. Later I had no attention from them in hs and college, so it kinda never began.
I just cope with gym and consooming content. It is how it is.