>on summer vacation
>waking up with the sunrise every morning
>walk 3 miles before 9 AM for breakfast
>read and write all day long
>get high or drunk in the evenings to unwind
This is literally the best life. I get endless congratulations and thanks for the work I do.

>>81464505 (OP)
>have to teach nigger children

>>81464505 (OP)
thank you for your work, anon
i feel like teachers are one of the most underappreciated professions of all, so thanks for your work
i think i'll only become a teacher later on in my life as i enjoy teaching, but i'll be a uni prof instead

>>81464505 (OP)
the entire reason is because loli is illegal in my country and if i were a teacher and wrongly indicted for being a pedo then they found gelbooru and pic related in my network history i do not think things would go well for me
i believe i would make a good teacher and i that i would both enjoy it and derive satisfation from it but the risks are too high
i remember when i was at school a teacher was indicted by a girl and even though he was acquitted his career and probably life was ruined
it's just not worth it

>>81464505 (OP)
I dated someone's bald teacher from soc and he was my looksmatch and he ghosted me. Crazy to think I cuddled with someone's teacher just to get dumped

>>81464505 (OP)
I work in schooling and I would never recommend this job to anyone, especially with Gen Alpha starting to emerge. Kids who were born around and during COVID are monsters, behaviours like excessive violence (including making makeshift weapons to use on staff and peers) are the norm. Literacy has plummeted, numeracy too, and this is in a mostly white district so you can't blame brown people too much.

>>81464505 (OP)
what sort of degree must you have to be a teacher?

>>81464505 (OP)
i wouldn't get hired because i have spergy red flags that force me to work in male or isolated environments

>>81464505 (OP)
>Seriously, why aren't you a teacher?
I hate children and being around them as my job would be hell lol
And I wouldn't say highschool would be any better to teach either because I wanted to kill myself being near my classmates when I was still in school.

>>81464510
>>81464540
Well I can see why you two aren't teachers I suppose.
>>81464580
What were you doing in the school exactly? Sounds like a behavior management issue.
>>81464584
I personally hold a bachelor's as well as two teaching certificates, I had to take two, 100+ question exams at a testing center sponsored by the state.
>>81464587
I thought that about myself, but I've found that my female coworkers (read: moms and grandmas) really appreciate what they term as an "eccentric" younger guy around. Since I'm "hip" with today's video games and anime programs.

>>81464540
if you're into loli you should be kept away from schools anon

>>81464615
I find teachers usually think they have a lot of cachet on 4chan because they have a kind of desirable liminal status between the world of youth and the world of adults. The truth is you're just revealing the truth of teachers as being ignoble scoundrels who plumb the dark ends of the internet and probably also enjoy seeing these things realized in their work place. Teachers are also forced to cry "I'm not like that" even after blatantly being like that to your face. So, it's hard to trust they really have the moral fortitude to do their job properly.

>>81464615
it's ironic - i have a family friend who is a teacher who tells me every time we meet how i would be a good teacher and how they desperately need more teachers and particularly male teachers
while i don't mention anime, i tell her my reasons and she agrees that it is an intimidating career, particularly for men
even independent of sexual accusations, a headteacher killed themselves here only a few years ago when their school was given a bad report and teachers commonly have a lot of pressure and stress due to factors they can't reasonably resolve (because how do you make stupid bad kids magically become good and smart?)
i worry about the future of education and i genuinely think i'd be a good teacher since i often find myself teaching people in my life anyway

>>81464615
My job is mostly education intervention for "challenging" kids. You'll probably go "oh then of course you see the worst" but that's really not the case, I work with mid-low level cases because the actually severe cases are frequently shipped off to special temporary schools to try and reintegrate them into normalcy, which doesn't work. I have looked at the data for my school district and it is grim regarding literacy and numeracy, with the majority of children underperforming. Again, white and upper middle class. I have worked in actually difficult neighbourhoods and those are far, far worse with frequent race wars between various ethnic groups, and rh majority of kids simply cannot read.

"Behavior management" is a meme because we aren't allowed to do anything except call their parents, and parents either don't care or can't do anything themselves. We also have heaps of children entering schooling who aren't toilet trained and just shit and piss themselves to the point that we have staff dedicated to changing their underwear and keep spare underwear on site.

I can't imagine what these kids will be like as adults.

>>81464623
i'd assert that is a ridiculous conflation
i'm into cigarettes too but it doesn't mean i smoke

>>81464667
the* majority of kids. The irony of fat fingering that.

>>81464615
Don't you feel nervous having all those kids rely on you and having to guide them? I think I would be too anxious

>>81464510
>>81464580
This but fucking actually. It's literally just impossible to fight the chaos. I mean, it's not impossible, but you will get clinical depression.

>>81464587
>>81464584
Let me give it to you straight, if you are in a major American city and have a bachelor's degree in literally fucking anything you're good. Officially the requirements are blah blah blah blah whatever. They are WOEFULLY understaffed.
Sure, you won't officially be a teacher if you're not allowed to be, but you'll be that "aide" or "substitute" with a fucking homeroom and a schedule who they see every day and who does the fucking job of teaching them. Again, you don't have to be qualified to do this. With the state our education is in, you think they're hiring people they vetted? Bro. It's some underqualified jackass who just stumbled out of a frat party with mountains of student debt, bolstered by a single black/Hispanic mom who has some kind of "lunch aide" role because her kid goes to the school.
This is purely hypothetical, but if you were at all educated and went to some shit inner-city school district they'd hire you. Period. They'd hire you if you were visibly ripping dab carts in the parking lot. Really you could have worked for El Chapo and they'd probably hire you as long as you weren't convicted of literally butchering kids on camera. I don't think you fully appreciate how bad it is. You'd THINK, "Nah, they'd never hire me, they must have standards" but nah, if you really wanted alone-time with 30 strangers' kids for 8+ hours a day you could probably just have it. Let that sink in.
>but isn't there a background check and a test and certifications and a drug test and some kind of orientation pro-
No. None of that. More like 30 misbehaved kids and a "good luck." If anything you hope one of the kids is retarded so you can have an additional adult in the room.

>>81464540
You can just be a lolicon. It's not like anyone asks.

>>81464750
Not really. Every year I get in my own head and freak myself out, wondering if this is the year I've lost my touch, but the reality is I truly believe I was meant to be a teacher. It is effortless to me. It is so much fun, it is so energizing, the students love me, I love teaching them, I've never encountered a problem I couldn't solve. My biggest headaches come from my coworkers.
Usually once a quarter for the past two years I've put up "Ask a School Teacher Anything" threads, not sure you if you've ever read any of them but I go into pretty rigorous detail about why I blame staff for most of the problems plaguing today's campuses.

>>81464831
>I've never encountered a problem I couldn't solve
I have seen a boy start a posse of other kids and start building a sacrificial altar, complete with makeshift sacrificial knife, and tell a girl he was going to cut her open, take all of her blood and make her parents cry because they would never see her again as he dragged her towards the altar.

I'm not sure how you "solve" this kind of endemic behaviour besides mass expulsions.

>>81464855
A complete and utter failure of a school. All of you should've been fired a long time ago. I spit on you.

>>81464887
Anon, we get in trouble with the government if we do anything. Some children are just fundamentally broken and we are forced to try and integrate them into society.

Once, a kid got his hands on a shovel and was running around hitting other kids with it (he even pushed one off the playground, who fell about 6 feet) and I yelled/barked at him to stop. It worked, he stopped, but I was reprimanded and given a warning by the school district for yelling. Their reasoning was that the child had a "trauma background" and that me yelling at him was damaging and infringing on his school experience and rights as a child... As he ran around smacking kids with a shovel and laughing like a madman.

We do our best with what we are allowed to do. All we can do is offer gentle reprimands and short "rethink" times during play (10 minutes at most because the UN Rights of the Child say that "play" is a fundamental human right for children and we cannot infringe on that).

>4th period Xth graders
>student asks if I want to see a picture of her kitty~
>brain: dafuq, phrasing, why did you say it like that
>are you trying to get me v& wtf is this
>shows me a google images pic of a cartoon cat on her phone
>smuganya.jpg
>HAHA YOU ACTUALLY LOOKED MR ANON
>not really sure how to end this interaction and hate the fact that it just occurred at all
>tell myself that 4chan has ruined me and that's not how she meant the joke whatever the joke was
>pretend interaction never occurred
>time passes
>HEY MR ANON WANNA SEE MY COOKIE
>google images pic of literal cookie, haha you looked mr anon
>oh no, twice is a pattern
>nah it's just my grownup internet brain not getting the joke whatever it is
>HEY MR ANON WANT TO *EAT* MY COOKIE, huge shit-eating grin
>physical cookie in-hand as the prop this time, she has upgraded
>from this point somehow busts out a cunny pun on me like twice a week for like a semester and the pun never repeats
>kitty
>bunny
>box
>cookie
>taco
>muffin
>just fucking mash A on her dialogue box when I see this kid now and keep walking now, I am NOT trying to complain to another adult about this, nope, NOPE, spaghetti stays in pockets, don't need that
>utterly failing at discipline here because I'm not sure I could even explain this to admin and there is still just the THINNEST veneer of plausible deniability that none of these are vagina puns
>I cannot tell whether the other staff can't hear this shit, don't care, don't wanna acknowledge it either, what
>feel like the instant I acknowledge that playing with someone's box means cunt is the instant Chris Hansen just materializes

>>81464781
>You can just be a lolicon. It's not like anyone asks.
unfortunately it's illegal here and my government spies on me
part of why i don't apply is i fear i already have black marks against me on my hidden police record and dare not find out
it shouldn't need to be said but i have never touched csam and would find it repulsive not to mention anything in real life
but my government thinks that drawings can't consent or something
honestly i don't even like lolis sexually as i have completely different fetishes but they are cute
so long as i never check i can live in ignorance but it is a shame because it must be very fulfilling helping to shape people positively and watching them grow in part thanks to you

things sound awful wherever you are
when i talk to the friend i mentioned, i often say
>our schools will be like america in 20 years: public school will simply be anarchic daycare and anyone who wants a genuine education will need to go private
that said, i do recall one of my own coevals who was in the lowest classes but genuinely wanted to try in his exams and he petitioned to be allowed to sit in the sort of detention room to study rather than in his class because it was simply a zoo so i suppose that option will continue to exist
>>81464855
this is something else i used to worry about
sincd teachers are utterly Impotent now how do you deal with a bad kid? you can't even expel them often because you're the bottom of the barrel and there is nowhere else to put them
either they are feral and on the streets or they are somewhat contained in detentions while they hound other students
public teaching is truly in shambles

>>81464505 (OP)
Our school actually had us try and teach kids. I could not do it for shit. I'm too spergy and soft-spoken, the little kids don't respect me

>>81464505 (OP)
My plan is to be a data science/tech philosophy professor after a couple decades. Right now I need to start my law degree and PhD and work for about 30 years.

>>81464992
I know you meant to use that image of Nagatoro to represent how you feel, but it's funny to imagine your student coming up to you with a face like that and saying all of that, just waiting for you to slip up so you can be raped by Chris Hansen and The Booty Warrior (they've joined forces).

>>81466437
>law degree
>data science professor
>in 30 years
>of working in not-data science
lmao

>>81464992
you have to discipline her with your cock

>>81467388
Fleece Hansen is a TERRIFYING thought

>>81464510
just teach private school, no problem.

>>81464505 (OP)
Those who can't, teach. Those who do, do. I do do.

>>81468074
>teaching is not a skill in itself
i'm certain that you would be a terrible teacher

Because where I live, I'd have to deal with little shits every day and feral nigs destroying the classroom. Fuck that shit.