Thread 81559660

Not taking the bait edition

Fish thread:>>81539494

>>81559660 (OP)
Popping this thread's cherry oriorioriroiro

>>81559660 (OP)
If a thread in the VG thread section is related to a game that you can play in a browser, it is likely to be taken down by admins

4chan mods and power tripping, name a more iconic duo.

>>81559770
BIG BLACK COCK and meow's anus

>>81559660 (OP)
literally me, metaphorically

im trying to be more intellectual hehehehe

>>81559584
trying to find out who is chad

people are setting off fireworks even though it isn't the 4th of july yet. Never understood the normie obsession with them anyway.

>>81558858
>>81558929
i had a math professor like the professor you speak of and a co worker like the burly house guy you speak of. he was from portugal, named bonanzio.

>>81560104
fireworks are fun, you might be mentally disabled

>>81560150
nta but they arent

>>81560150
not the ones people set off in their backyards. All fun and games until you lose a hand.

>>81560150
what if you had a bf that was like a puppy and got scared by them would you think they were fun still when he is all afraid and alone in the house while you watch the scary sounding lights in the sky without him?

>>81560176
that's kinda funny secondhand, in a cosmic sense
>>81560325
he just needs exposure therapy
we'll start small with sparklers in our driveway, then shoot bottle rockets, then finally join a political activism group and lob rpgs at blackhawks

I hope you get all the love and all the shine

>>81560325
I like fireworks but I can't be close to where they're being set off because it triggers my agoraphobia and I start feeling in my gut that gravity is reversing and sucking me up into the sky and I start panicking.

>>81561631
You must have been bad at school, that not how pyrotechnics work.

I'm gonna try and start a online business project soon. Don't really wanna self dox but I'm a bit nervous about it. Hopefully it isn't a complete failure. I already have the product I wanna produce all envisioned and I hope people like it enough to be able to continue to do what I love doing.

and I'm gonna start transitioning soon, was nice knowing you

>>81561718
Made me chuckle, very lols

I work at a fancy hotel and this morning some drunk old richfag that's taken a liking to me was holding my hand and telling me shit in broken english I couldn't understand and probably wanted me to go to his room and fuck.
The thought is making me uncomfortably horny. I wish this was a larp

>>81561939
What if his pp is big? Kinda hot, I would if anyone liked me, at least that way.

this song is nice i think
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=re-gHz_ZXcM

How do successfully break up with my furure boyfriend or alternatively warm him up to the idea of fucking other people in our bed

Pebis hurt
Too much jorkin

>>81562025
sounds kinda generic imo
anyways here's one from before we were born
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usDWPZWikiY
>>81562360
gotta let the meat rest

Most gay niggers are pedos that's why they like twinks that look like underage boys.
Homosexual sexuality reproduces itself through molestation and pornography.

>>81562511
How come I want to fuck hairy fat men then?

>>81562521
You got molested and now you're recreating the experience for yourself because you're sick.

>>81562541
I've never been molested, even if I was then why would I be the giver and not receiver when with my chubbyfit hairy bf my age? You're dumb

Pigged out yesterday so I shall be fasting today

>>81562569
why should you be fasting today

I wish I could just be legally restricted from buying alcohol, I don't want to drink anymore but I can't stop myself.

My stepsister is getting gay married tomorrow, I don't know but I assume she might have some gay friends, would it be in poor taste to try and meet someone at another person's wedding?

>>81563451
not at all. love is always in the air at those things.

>>81563462
They're getting married in another state so even if I did meet someone I'd pretty much only be able to text them probably, but then again the happy couple met eachother online and moved in together and now they're getting hitched so maybe it'll work out? I don't know, I just don't want to accidentally make a scene on their special day by acting like a sperg and creeping out some other guy.

>>81560325
i misread this and thought you said you had a bf, my bf was a boy on grindr who i talked to twice and fell in love with but was too scared to talk to again or meet up with even though he wanted to, then he left grindr for a while and i was sad and obsessively checked until he came back and i was really excited that he remembered me and gave me his number but then i got ghosted for months. yesterday i doxxed him and found out he had died 12 days after he gave me his number.

>>81563640
This is grinders fault, it is evil.

>>81560325
That's me I'm very sensitive to loud noises so fireworks hurt my brain.

>>81563680
is any dating app better? Im straight so Ive avoided them like the plague cause of the whole difference in demographics

>>81563738
I have no idea, I'm gay and I also avoid them because they seem gross and dehumanizing.

>>81563854
they are, and I hate them too. but the convenience of being able to find people is probably a worthy trade off for some. I just fuking hate modern life so so much

Holy shit the thread is teetering on the precipice of the void. Where are all my homos?

>>81564006
theres this new thing where we just go to the park and take our shirts off and see what happens. pretty fun.

>>81564929
God if only this were true

How come every day there's a dozen threads of bottoms attention whoring and trying to bait replies with gay bottom porn threads but you never see tops do this

Just further proof that all bottoms are whores and evil where as tops are pure and innocent

My legs are starting to act up again, wonderful. I guess I had some time free of the numbness and pain but now it's back just in time for the summer.

>>81565202
I'm a top and I'm not pure and innocent

How about none of us are pure and innocent and most of us are horny. It's okay to admit that.

>>81564973
it...it is??

>>81565295
I'm not horny either, I'm just too wise and worldly to be called pure or innocent

>>81565276
Probably because you've been corrupted by bottoms because bottoms are the source of all evil in men

>>81565295
I'm so fucking horny all the time, but as a top I'm simply too busy and important to make threads. That's bottom work.

>>81565321
Not possible, I'm uncorruptable and incorrigible

>>81565346
You just said you weren't innocent or pure so obviously you can be corrupted you fat headed ninny

it's been fun 28 years and I gotta wrap it up, god could have made me a man yet instead choose to make me an ugly dicklet, no boyfriend will ever love me so I should do preemptive suicide

>>81565373
Man I was just thinking this on the bike ride home. I wonder if that metal bar that attaches to the garage door opener would hold my weight?

>>81565373
If you have a tiny penis why not just be a bottom?

>>81565365
No way I'm like a bad boy who used to be bad ass but now I'm good ass

>>81565428
>but now I'm good ass
You mean you're a whore?

It's saturday so I'm drinking (I'm a neet so every day is saturday)

>tfw no ass

It's all bony with no fat or muscle. Wouldn't even be fun to grab.

>>81565434
No I'm like superman except I can't fly or shoot lasers without my wing suit and laser gun

>>81565474
Oh I see what you're saying you're saying that you're chad and you can have sex whenever you want cause you're good looking meanwhile I will never be able to have sex just because of my height it's over

>>81565493
It's true that I'm good looking and tall but that doesn't make me a whore

>>81565510
You being a sex haver and being able to have sex whenever you want is what makes you a whore

>>81565548
It's been so long since I had sex (with my long-term r9gay boyfriend) that I'm medically considered straight now

>>81565589
No you're medically considered a non virgin whore now

Hellas Planizia

>>81565461
You must come with me to the gym and hit the glute machine.
I just learned that I've been doing it wrong, which is why I only feel it on the front of my thighs. Next leg day I will destroy my ass and build it back stronger.

>>81565607
You're not a doctor you don't know that

>>81565754
I could be a doctor you don't know that

>>81565764
Maybe you could be a doctor but you're obviously not one...

is sex all you guys care about

>>81565904
No, I just got done telling that other guy I don't care about sex

I don't care about sex yay

>>81565920
Oh yeah you don't care about sex at all that's why you've had it so many times

I miss 3ds

>>81565960
My partner count is below average, maybe even below average for this community since you're all younger and likely to have sex in the future

>>81565904
are the sex havers of 4chan in the room with us now?

>>81566011
i mean im more concerned about the fact that no one loves me because i have a shitty personality and im a boring nigger who cant hold a conversation because i only think about my insecurities

>>81566010
given the hyper sexuality of gay normies having a lower count than normal is nothing to be proud of.

>>81566021
I'm a piece of shit too, I need a guy like you as a bf

>>81566021
all things you can change, unlike the greatest detriment that is liking women, aka being me

>>81566010
Below average? so 20 instead of 30 you fucking whore?

>>81565904
It is like 60% of what I care about, the other 40% is cuddling. I need physical contact.

>>81566026
>>81566054
"The average number of lifetime sexual partners reported by adults ranges from 4 to 10"

>>81566077
that's still too high. Are you telling me the average gay dude isn't fucking a new guy every single night (or multiple in the same night) from grindr?

>>81565391
no stop it, your boyfriend will love you and cherish you, garage door won't handle you fatass but bf will
>>81565397
because i don't want to just be a bottom? because it won't help me in any way? because at least one issue won't be solved that way?

Some dude is railing my fbf right now and he's just gonna leave afterwards without even kissing or hugging him and it's all because I'm a pathetic loser who couldn't husband him up first.

>>81566118
I think a lot of average gay dudes are shut in turbo virgins like you and I, in fact, get this, we -are- average gay dudes.

>>81566135
hey that's cuck talk, your fbf is waiting patiently for you somewhere and you will find each other.

>>81566077
Okay but this isn't the average for gay men which is like 100 a year

>>81566174
I wish to see my future bf getting dicked down by another good top and watching his eyes to up receiving pleasure I can't give him

>>81566174
God I hope that's true. I hate reading all the rage bait straight incels post about woman feeling like shit after hookups, my fbf shouldn't have to live with that.

>>81566135
Mine is probably getting his beard wet in some pool at a resort, wearing skimpiest thong ever and showing off hole.

How do I cope with the fact that 99% of all gays use grindr or other gay apps to hook up and fuck each other while and in meantime dating people who do don't know about they sexual adventures while dating?

I'm the albatross across your clavicles where husbie

Need a bf to watch this with asap

>>81565904
I care about sex with someone I love and they love me back but knowing that most have already been plowed by god knows how many cocks I feel reluctant to even seek after love

Look at this yay

>>81566884
Careful so you don't get fat.

>>81566884
Nigga how many eggs do you eat?

>>81566884
>orange monster
I thought bottoms drank pink monster?

finally fucked some ass.
i came before even starting to properly hump and just awkwardly humped him as i grew softer and softer until he stroked himself to completion.
deliciously unsatisfying for him no doubt but this is a #topworld and i got mine.

>>81566955
He will not call for you again.

>>81566955
hell yea dude. where'd you meet him

>>81566976
perhaps, but i've already got what i desired
>>81566995
tagmap. we're on good terms, so i think with practice i can stop being a nopump chump

>>81559763
Are you sure about this random fact?

>>81566884
I wish I could live this extravagant of a life.

>>81566955
>"You," he said, "are a bottom in a terribly top world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain."

>>81566904
How so yay watermelons aren't that fattening
>>81566919
Two a day usually
>>81566930
It is pink
>>81567029
Indeed the watermelon was pretty cheap though

>>81566930
Not a bottom anymore, but when I wuz I liked silver and blue the most.

>>81567070
Sugar, you will gain lots of fat.

>>81567070
Eat four or five, become a morning egg monster.

>>81567070
>It is pink
Wow strange how the picture makes it look orange or maybe there's something wrong with my eyesight.
>>81567074
>Not a bottom anymore
>anymore
how'd you escape?

>>81559978
Cute but what do you mean specifically ?
>>81560089
Why didn't you ask then? He was talking about a troll poster, you posting some irrelevant guy has nothing to do with what he was talking about. You can't talk like a normal person, can you?
>>81561861
???

Do you think bottoms or tops have it harder in life?

>>81567109
Bottoms have it easy to pick tops but they can fail to pick the right top.
Tops have to compete and if you are not good enough you will not do anything.

>>81567081
Are watermelons that sugary
>>81567091
Nah
>>81567109
Tops since they're retarded

>>81567124
Tops barely have to put in any effort though just don't eat fast food and get any little exercise at all and bottoms will be all over you. Meanwhile bottoms gotta shave, be thin, have perfect twink bodies (but not too muscular), smell good, act cute/submissive, be small and cute kawaii sugoi, and be willing to play a passive role in the relationship.
>>81567140
Bottoms are more likely to me mentally ill though (because they have to deal with tops.)

>>81567109
the world is full of evil bottoms who just want to hurt innocent tops :(

>>81567159
>Tops barely have to put in any effort though
Let me ask this, would you let a fat ugly guy top you?

>>81567093
I no longer seek penetration and on the way to become free of sex.
>>81567140
Yah, two eggs is not that much. Didn't you want to bodybuild a big big rack? Come on and be an egg slut like some.
>>81567159
Correct.

>>81567165
I'll have you know that there are TONS of bottoms into that.
>>81567162
Hurt people hurt people, and who hurt bottoms? Tops.
>>81567180
>Correct
On which part?

>>81567165
yes if we hit it off, i still would prefer him to have a cute face but the body i don't care for if he choose to love me

>>81567191
>I'll have you know that there are TONS of bottoms into that.
And the same goes with tops, there are tons of tops that like chubby, fat or obese bottoms out of fetishism.

My case is not about who has it worse but to highlight that both have different aspects to struggle through.
>>81567204
Face is something no one can fix unless born with good genetics or get surgery.

>>81567221
>And the same goes with tops
Literally 1%, with bottoms it's at least 15%.

>>81567191
I wanna say the first part is correct, but I gotta admit for me about me both would describe.
>>81567204
Correct.

>>81567224
Instead of pulling out random numbers from your ass you could provide proof of it.

I still need one of you to become my boyfriend
you won't need to fuck me and i'll let you get sexy with other guys just let me love and cherish you

>>81567276
A gay cuck? That's new.

>>81567109
>>81567159
I'm a top and I've never had sex because I'm only 5'8 so bottoms reject me and mock me

That desperate act ain't doing you any favours sis

>>81567309
There are at least 2 bottoms in this thread which are like 5'5 and below you are fine.

>>81563271
Give me all the money you would spend on it and not only are you getting healthier but also helping someone out as well

>>81567321
Not him but why should they pick him and not a taller guy if they have a preference for taller guys?

>>81567321
I've had bottoms that are shorter then me mock me for my height on numerous occasions I've also had bottoms with cocks smaller then mine make fun of my penis size

>>81567330
Because bottoms aren't facetious like tops, obviously.

>>81567358
But if that was true how come this guy feels the opposite?>>81567336

on my "start doing zyns as an appetite suppressant" arc
also while we're on the topic short tops are cute, I've said it before and I'll keep saying it

>>81567372
I believe in you because you were looking at cute short tops not at short tops.

>>81567362
Obviously he's lying to paint bottoms in a bad light, trying to radicalize other tops into loneliness like himself because he's mentally ill and doesn't respect bottoms.

>>81567383
I wasn't even looking at anyone, I'm inventing a guy in my head and wanting to have sex with him

>>81567387
I don't see bottoms in a bad light nor in a good light, no one with any brain cell does it regardless bottom or top.
>>81567395
I know and that person you imagined was a cute short top not a short top.

>>81567403
Well yes, but I was comparing him to a hypothetical cute tall top and found him favourable

>>81567403
Then why did you say such an obvious lie about bottoms?

>>81561718
>and I'm gonna start transitioning soon, was nice knowing you
Meow

>>81567411
True because you made the cute short top, cuter than the cute tall top you imagined.
>>81567413
You are mistaking me for the other anon, I feel you need to relax.

>>81567387
How can anyone respect bottoms when they are so vain and reject everyone and shame them for the slightest defect? Just because I'm below average height I will never have sex and it's bottoms fault

>>81567423
Alright alright sorry my bad.

>>81567362
This guy has been spamming for a year about this exact only thing, I don't think you should take him seriously

>>81567423
I'm imagining two otherwise identical tops, quit being silly or I'll start putting things on the top shelf

>>81567159
i'm a mentally ill bottom yay
>>81567180
I can't hit the gym yet either so no point

>>81567432
No worries.
>>81567433
I see, I will remember it.
>>81567439
Hm...

>>81567431
Making up problems and people in your head again? Have you actually tried with bottoms in real life and not just pretend-dates online? This is why bottoms have to it so bad, because of tops like you...

>>81567433
>This guy has been spamming for a year
Take your meds I'm completely new here

>>81567415
Hi I'm meow

>Take your meds I'm completely new here
lol

>>81567448
Bottoms reject me and make it so I can never have sex and have to spend the rest of my life alone and you're trying to blame all tops because of it

Bottoms truly are disgusting vile creatures incapable of even taking responsibility for their actions

I wish tops (any kind, short or not) liked slightly towering bottoms (around 6'4", give or take), but the train is too far gone now for me to cry about it.

>>81567463
I am though I've only made like 10 posts here so far
maybe you just have early onset dementia

>>81567488
I have seen a few short tops wanting tall bottoms but getting cold feet when most tall bottoms ask for tops with big dongs. Maybe some top with big dong will take you.

pro tip: short tops will appear to have bigger dongs due to proportions

>>81563738
Straight dating apps exist cuckbot. Do you like interracial cuck apps more? I bet you do

>>81567477
See? Lies and deceit... Bottoms will never catch a break.

>>81567488
I'd find that hot so long as the bottom is a twink and not some huge 6'4" burly dude

I am getting kinda sleepy can someone else pick up from where I left off (ragebaiting tops) from here?

>>81567543
No, once you rest your head there will be nothing but peace here waiting for you once you wake
I hope you choose to embrace it, then

>>81567506
Eh, I don't care about it anymore, they'll find their heart's desires anyway.
>>81567522
Yeah that why I'm locking in for couple more years to be some sort of slimmed down twunk, maybe will come around and seek a relationship, femboy look won't probably serve me well tho.

>>81563854
I feel exactly the same and it makes me smilewhen I see more people feel like that too
>>81565373
If it's been fun so far why not stay for a bit longer lol
Btw have you seen the average couple? They're not exactly goodlooking. Stop your bitching.
>>81565461
Skinny = perfect
Only nighers like big booty

>>81567571
What is your body type and physique right now then?

>>81567552
I cannot rest, in my heart there is a curse older than the breath of the trees.

I kinda wanna buy Cleveland in Fortnite.

>>81567109
I have it harder in my pants

>>81567685
>I have it harder in my pants
What did he mean by this?

>>81565644
>walking barefoot
>>81565904
Not at all but some of you do
>>81566884
Lucmu Kananmunat

>>81567581
Average, I'm don't frequent gyms and only do stuff at home with equipment that can be stored easily. Too fat to be a twunk, arms not big enough, tummy not scupled and has no visible abs, pecs are there but not as big as I want, arms and legs are ok tho.

>He plays fagnite
couldn't be me t b h d e s u

>>81567714
I only play it with frens.
>>81567704
Shorty babe knows what I mean no cap

>>81567711
Now I'm curious and want to see what you look like naked

>>81567728
Sorry I am not a "shorty" "babe" I am a "boy" with a "benis"

>>81566955
>Im 18 and never had sex my life is over after actually looking for it

>>81567737
But you are short so half of it was true...

>>81567767
I am not that short I am like average worldwide.

>>81567109
Obviously bottoms because they tend to be more introverted, less confident and have all the qualities that make life harder for you, stereotypically speaking. Now tops also have it easier in the dating scene because there are too many bottoms desperate for cock and not enough cock to go around.

>>81567774
Short for swedes

>>81567708
LuOmu, it means natural eggs

>>81567305
Cuckbot has been trolling for like a year at least

>>81567794
Doesn't count nuh uh

>>81567829
This is deceptive because you just call every poster you disagree with cuckbot and there's been like 20 of them so far

I'm not a cuck just want to love a boyfriend and give him the best and he shouldn't touch my revolting body or face and should have sex with other men

Meow I'm tiwed also my piss was an unhealthy color I thought you guys would love to know

Guess I Am A Cuck I Like When People Fuck On My Bitch

>>81567951
hydrate meow and maybe stay out of the sauna for a bit. I bet all that sweating dehydrates you.

>>81568002
Yeah I didn't go to the sauna today I just Haven't drank enough water

>>81567862
Except I only call one easily identifiable known troll that but nice fantasy

yep my leg is back to being numb and hurting. Ready for months of hearing me complain about it? Several weeks at least.

>>81567776
>>81567109
Also bottoms tend to not straight pass so enjoy your homophobic bullying I guess lol

Meow I'm so glad I'm straight passing yay

>>81563640
i'm sorry, anon
how are you feeling about it?

>>81568055
my leg hurts also...weare just like famous doctor of House

>>81568341
i'm ok today
thanks for asking
it is what it is

I went to the store yesterday and yet I still ate out today because it was so hot out. Well it;s going to be hot out for the next week+ so I have to get this under control. What I would give for just a tiny bit of willpower.

>>81568504
oh, glad you're alright
hug

>>81568845
i'm just venting to my cuppla friends and making it their problem

>>81569054
Yeah it was like neon oragne

>>81567685
You can't buy cleveland I live here

Had sardine pasta and 750 ml of honey liqueur for dinner, my stomach is staging a revolt against me and I want to die. I hate drinking, I hate it so much.

>>81568839
cant do nothin in summer out there. muggy as a cup of hot soup. freezer full of ice cream sandwiches was my best friend.

>>81569054
Kissing meow and stroking his hair and telling him I'm sorry he was hurt by so many guys in the past and I hope I can finally let him feel at peace.

>>81569127
Biting you in the head. Hard.

>>81569121

I didn't want to cook because it would heat up the house. The A/C can barely keep up when it gets really hot like this. It runs all day and the temp still goes up slowly. If I cook then it just get worse and won't go back down until nightfall.

>>81569260
oh, i know exactly what youre talking about. i didnt even have ac the first summer i had my own apartment in that area. youre gonna need some microwaveable frozen foods, or else just cold cuts n cheese for sandwich life. however if i had a backyard there i might e gotten a little smokey and done some grilling. do you have a grill or anything? picrels are pretty cheap.

>>81569406

There's one in the garage but it hasn't been used in ages and is rusty as all hell. I'd never grill outside anyway, too many bugs and I couldn't stand the heat to do it.

The thing is I bought meat and stuff that will need to be cooked. I might have to cook dinner in the morning when it isn't too hot and then reheat it later.

>>81568845
though come to think of it i cried more today than yesterday but i guess that's how it goes

>>81569502
yeah, i would toss it and just buy another. people do cookouts at night for a reason! you could cook a few days of steaks or chicken when its cooler out at like 10pm. the smoke from the fire keeps away bugs as well. people used to make "smudge fires" to do that even in very hot places.

you know, if youre going to use your phone, you might as well do it while walking slowly on a treadmill. theres lots of working that can be done walking on a phone. i might start writing a lot more emails this way. computers are nicer to use but i dont think sitting down for long stretches is good. on the treadmill if i get stuck i can at least turn the speed up while thinking and be getting something done. i played a ton of pokemon emerald on the treadmill last year; restarted the locke like 6 or 8 times cause i do a rule where you cant grind. but eventually i finished it which is pretty hard with that rule. have to be very startegtic about who you use and who exp goes to when. anyway it was a lot of play hours, 30 min a day adds up more than you think. that one i did by just putting the game on the treadmill counter thing and tapping it when needed. makes you realize how much waiting there is in games. anyway i did that while working up to a good clip running while playing over a few months. i forgit why i stopped actually.

>>81570453
whered you get a treadmill

leg hurting, carpal tunnel flaring up as well, plus tired and and a stomach ache.

This neet body is falling apart.

This neet's body need a dick or two

>>81567124
>Tops have to compete
Tell us you have 0 experience without telling us. There's like 9 bottoms for every top

>>81567477
You sound like you were rejected by one random guy, and it completely shattered your self esteem, you never recovered from the emotional damage.
I bet it wasn't even irl, but just some random anonymous gay that flinched at your height and you took it to heart.

>>81571019
Where's my harem of r9gay bottoms then

>>81571019
yeah hook me up then dude where are they
>>81570954
what is your disc my pfp is butterdog

beef quesadilla

fag sex

>>81570647
basement of my building has two treadmills and some weight machines, but more importantly a really long wall mirror for looking at myself.

I'm kinda really depressed tonight, maybe the antipsychotics are failing...

I love waking up at 2 am I love it I feel so healthy and hydrated I forgot to get my suitcase out of the attic so I'm just gonna have to pack everything in my camping backpack because I'm leaving super duper early.
What is everybody up to?

>>81572781
transforming my shockwave right now

>be gay
>be autistic
>also be ugly
a fate worse than death

>>81571364
>>81571561
At that one place you never tried: dating apps

im probably not gay. im just, prison/lonely gay. that sucks. it seems like it could be fun

>>81573067
You're probably at least bisexual. Straight men don't even seriously consider same sex relationships.

>>81573070
well then i wish i was more bisexual. harder bisexual. or something. either make girls less weird and unapproachable, or make guys seem hotter and break that threshold of me ever actually taking action on a guy irl. i want my mind to make up its mind already, hurry the fuck up

>>81572984
update: did not go well

>>81568845
imi just going to be alone forever its ok and i'll never learn what he was like in person, how he sounded or moved what his favorite things were etc even though we hit it off and he could have been my slutty gooner bf

day 1 billion of dreaming of learning bartending and mixology-ing

>>81573253
>slutty gooner bf
dime a dozen

>>81573261
not one who likes me and lives nearby

>>81573270
the fuck you live, idaho?

>>81573290
i just have no rizz and high standards and suburbs aren't that densely populated

>>81559660 (OP)
I'm so sick of gays.making being gay their entire personality. Are you that fucking boring?

>>81573592
I have straight friends and they treat me normal

My personality is chud.

>>81573592
I am pretty fucking boring but I don't go around telling people I'm gay I just stay in my house

https://iseej.github.io/LovePawsona/
post your findings
I got hedgehog

>>81573790
Yeah this checks out

>>81573807
Hey I got this too wanna get married now

>>81573790
ouch. I had a friend that called me a duck ass nigga whenever I declined to out drinking and partying with him

I guess it's accurate.

>>81573886
>frenemies to lovers
could be fun

>>81573912
I have often thought I could bf up a cutesy unhinged bpd guy and just tank all their crazy shit like a champ

>>81573960
I don't have bpd but I'm just unhinged a playful kinda way

I'm not unhinged I'm epic yay

>>81572781
I don't go to bed before 2am, usually much later lol little baby

>>81573592
True. But what I hate more is straggot normalfags talking about drinking, sports and having sex or who they want to fuck (which is most of their conversations btw). Get some hobbies.

>heard blood hurdling cat scream at 4am
There's a stray cat the neighborhood takes care of and I'm scared it's him... I really hope it's just some other stray, as sad as that would still be. Our neighbor feeds him. I'm gonna look outside in the morning for him. I'm scared.

>>81574055
Me telling story to oink for me like the pig that he is

>>81574196
probably just another cat trying to muscle in on his territory. they often scream like that when fighting, don't worry anon

>>81574209
Are you sure? I thought somebody was dying for a second. It was very loud and lasted like 30 seconds. I do hope it was just that, I didn't hear a car engine and he's smart enough not to jump off somewhere very high or anything of that sort.

Deez ppl live in alternative reality I swear lolmao
https://youtu.be/j7SOc_8IhSY
I guess muttfags should say goodbye to their legal-yet-illegal-looking fbfs

>>81574215
yea. they latch onto each other and will screech like that in the others ear to get them off.

Threw up in the sink again award

>>81573790
capybara
hngfhngfugfygh

>>81571019
>There's like 9 bottoms for every top
This is a false statement, please provide proof of it rather than meek passive aggressive replies like.>>81573050
Because a dating app is a competition app and tops have to compete among other tops.

>>81573790
>https://iseej.github.io/LovePawsona/
This shit is gay as fuck, mine is completely fucking wrong.

>>81573177
This is tragic. Soundwave, play despacito.
Somehow this wasn't an original post?

>>81574597
I did it like 3 hours later.

This doesn't feel right. I think it took my being a boring and desperate people pleaser to mean that I was serious and responsible.
>>81574628
Oooo I like him, he looks like a space ship that would be on the cover of an 80s sci-fi novel.

>>81574650
It's the ship Unicron gave Galvatron in Transformers The Movie.

I wanna go to the beach each and get pucked up by a gyarou guy even if I'm a fat ugly mess

>>81574964
This is my sole inspiration for exercising, to pick up a fat ugly mess.
Literally, I want it to be a challenge when I bridal carry him.

>>81575060
What's wrong with you? Are you insane? Are-are you a boy with deep skin? Ca-can you be my coach and...bf?!

>>81575235
Keep my name put of your mouth ptui

imagine being dom top GOD meow's little bitch boy for a night and tasting his spit and struggling to take his long cock inside~~

Meow I couldn't be less of a dom top of I tried yay

>>81572404
I love quesedillas!

>>81575315
i know you wouldn't be, you bring it every time to more luckier guys, please just use me one time meowyyy

>>81575411
Okay I'll use you as nutrients for my sunflowers get in the woodchipper

jfc I'm retarded. I thought my chainsaw was broken and started taking it apart to only to discover the chain brake was engaged. I shouldn't be allowed near power tools.

>>81573790
No one else got a bird? I guess I'll post then.

Meow I'm hungry but I'm scared of throwing up again if I eat something

well time to cook a brunch and hopefully not roast my house. Right now the A/C can keep up and I need to figure out what to do for dinner that is not eating out. I can't do it for a week straight and waste expensive food I bought at the store.

Spirit X Strike isvery fun, love how easy combos are and it's literally fist of the north star. Very fun gaym.

I had a manic episode and shaved all my fucking hair off.
Can I still be cute?

>>81575914
depending on face yeah, after it grows a bit
also its summer so i think its a good choice, i myself would do it but im too attached to my cut

>>81575974
I have dark eyebrows which does a lot to make my face not look like a thumb, but sometimes the light hits my face in a way that makes my nasolabial folds apparent and I feel like picrel despite being a 22yo skinny prince.

>>81575914
Yes it's actually super cute on guys, I love buzz cuts and shaved head on them, it's boyfriend worthy!

>>81576079
try to smile a little more so that folds look like they're from smiling

>>81575868
Perfect BAC dom tops

>>81576143
Awesome. I hated taking care of my hair anyway. It never looked good

>>81576283
oh no you still gotta take care of that shit, shaved heads are a pain.

My carpal tunnel syndrome is so bad I can't even hold a control for more than 10 minutes without pain. Perhaps it's a good thing but because if it didn't I would have blown money on a ps5.

I think all bottoms should die actually
Total bottom death

all OTHER bottoms should die, leaving me the only one and my pick of the best top to be my bf.

>>81576444
and yet, how did you get here

>>81576419
was gonna suggest check out benheck, some nerd who in the mid 2000's did a bunch of custom controller/hwardware hacking for fun, and made a bunch of shit like "xbox controller for man who lost all his fingers but not his thumbs" or "left side of the controller is controlled by a foot", that sort of shit. he seems to only really do one handed controllers at the moment, but maybe that could help somehow anyways?

but the site doesnt seem to load and whatever

>>81576507

I'm not sure what could even made for it really. I still need to press buttons and work the controller but after a while my hand starts hurting and even say a left handed controller (assuming they even make those) wouldn't help because I don't have the dexterity in my left hand to properly play.

It's been years since I've never tried to use a controller too, I might not even last 10 minutes now. Espically not in a flare up stage like it is now.

>>81576444
Wow rude although I agree

>>81576444
I think all bottoms need to be loved and appreciated and they deserve reacharounds and kisses for being such good boys.

Wanna run but tummypain will make it really hard and horrible :(

the ultimate expression of drone technology will be insectoid micro drones, not carrying explosives but an excruciating non-lethal incapacitating poison sting. swarming over the nations and cities of the world like a biblical plague, only pre-approved white-listed groups, individuals and locations are exempt from being targeted. in these days men shall seek death and it shall flee from them.

"They were told not to harm the grass of the earth or any plant or tree, but only those people who did not have the seal of God upon their forehead"

>>81573790
Not sure what I got las time I took it but I got capybara now

Meow I'm dark and ebil fear me meow

Tried watching extreme peace and it just confirmed how unfunny Sam Hyde is

I love when guys are smarter than me, but that's kind of rare and when it does happen they're always elitists that I'm not good enough for. :(

>>81577360
it was a parody of the absurdity and humor in the show-making process itself. the joke is a bunch of sweaty middle aged guys in business suits losing their shit on a film set trying to make a show about doggy daycare daddy dom or something equally puerile and retarded.

>>81577428
And how does it make the episode funny?

>>81577547
the initial premise of the scene is nonsense, but our disbelief is suspended by the knowledge that what we're watching is only a show. when the fourth wall breaks, we ironically find an even more absurd situation playing out 'in reality.' the scene subverts our expectations to induce a sense of the surreal, making the viewer think about how people really do be acting silly sometimes by acting absurdly serious in situations that are ultimately frivolous

niggas out here jumping through mental hoops to justify a comedy show not being funny. Say whatever you want about what it's supposed to be but what it is is sam hiring an actor who looks like his dad because he's still salty he was barred from his funeral

>>81577666
But that's not funny, just drawn out and retarded

Boys are free btw you can just take them

Where someone to take me waa

>>81577709
Is that actually true? You can't tell what parts of Sam Hyde's life are true or false anymore.

Hank and Connor from Detroit BH FUCK and call each other dad/son while doing it and it's hot

>>81577983
yes in the episode he names the actor who walked out after his dad, I'm Sammy's biggest fan so I'm familiar with all this.

Well, every guest at the wedding is a woman. I guess I shouldn't have banked too hard on meeting a guy at someone else's wedding, but I do feel a little stupid. I even put pomade in my hair. At least it was a really touching ceremony. They played a slow version of "hopes and dreams" from undertale, I always liked that song.

>>81578608
It's a good song. But they are those kind of Tumblr ladies. They met through an online bookclub. My stepsister, one of the brides, showed me Homestuck when I was a kid.

>>81577178
everything that relies on gps can be speedily disabled by taking out a few defenseless satellites. local wireless communications can be jammed with emps. in current year, mutually assured destruction applies not only to nuclear weapons but also to delicate digital and electronic systems...moreover theres also le hacking, and at this point governments have so many 0day exploits on each others systems tucked away that nobody knows how it would shake out.

>>81578327
That seems like the sort of elaborate meme Sam Hyde would pull to pretend he's being sincere though.

>>81578608
To be completely fair the soundtrack has a bunch of bangers that work in plenty of situations.
When I used to go to the gym I played "Stronger Monsters" when going for PRs. it is nerd shit however, that I can't deny.

Toby fox ruined my life and I always wanted to defeat him.

>>81578658
YEAH I'm sure him almost crying on stream talking about his dad cutting him off over $20,000 is just a bit. I'm sorry but you have to be really naive or just haven't watched him enough to understand when he's not being ironic.

>>81578737
that's fair, I just think it's THE nerdiest thing ever, I'd rather have a capekino bf than someone who I'd bully for having bottom of the barrel taste.

>>81578919
I don't watch him at all. I didn't even know he streamed.

>>81578972
What about below the barrel taste?

>>81579003
that's still better than furry Oramiri or however it's called.
>>81578981
I've watched him since he made cam videos in his mom's house

All gay people are pedophiles.

>>81579070
Thank you for your input, and thank you for fighting for the survival of Western Civilization. God will reward you in Heaven.

I'm an autopedophile because I want my older bf to call me boy

TRVKE INCOMING
99% of "gay" people aren't mutants or defects or whatever they just destroyed their brains with porn and cooming so they fuck men now

>>81579138
I thought truth nukes have to be true

I played arcades with a friend again and got my ass kicked especially when he started using a different character because his attack was very tricky for me to deal with aaaaaaaaaaaaa
I lost all but one match. At one point I had the edge and was starting to build momentum and that's when he changed the character lol. How unfortunate

>>81579138
You're not gay if you didn't find men attractive to begin with, you become a prison gay that is considered a fag by straights and a worthless bishit by gays.

Don't say jack shit to Kaisha about this or she be haunting my ass for that child support.

>>81579202
I wish I had friends to play video games with. I don't even play video games, I just want to do something fun with someone.

>>81579302
I wish I had a bf to do stuff exclusively with

Like a best friend you marry

Need husband now give me

>>81579302
I think I get what you mean, I played a lot of vidya as a child but never really had friends to play it with so any singleplayer-multiplayer game basically had a bunch of inaccessible content.
If I have say minecraft to play with someone now I'll be happy to do it but I'll get bored after half an hour because I don't like vidya as much as I used to.

>"hey man wanna play video games? you pick this time haha"
>okay well how about X, Y, Z, F or H, we've never played those and it could be fun
>"ermmm nah lets just play the same thing as last week"
why even ask me then
I wish I had one of those big, TV show/Youtube clique friend groups who seemingly always agree with each other and have a good time
I've got all these coop games that I can literally only fantasy about playing with someone who actually just wants to have fun with me

I would be too nervous to play with anyone besides online randos that you never see again. Even then I rarely do that. I'd just end up making a fool of myself.

>Look up game recommendations
>co-op slop that you need "friends" to play with
*sigh*

on that topic

>tfw no bf to play lego star wars coop with

I just wish I could play any vidya, right now it's all I can do to use the mouse and type with the pain in this hand.

>>81579610
you need to let it rest bro...watch some movies or shows, or at least post with speech recognition. you need to let that rest for a good long time man...if you havent watched all of the peter ginn/alex langland documentaries theres something u could do, or theres also quest for the bay if you havent seen that.

i fucked up my wristie again somewhat by playing dwarffortress too hard. too much Designating. now its all set up but i think its a little of a boring embark, not many gobolins at all after quite a few years.

>>81579689

I never use speech recognition and I have mostly let it rest. I slept all afternoon basically. Typing out a quick post isn't that bad nothing too long.

watching travel vlogs as a substitute for going outside kind of day

Right now my fat ass would melt if I stepped outside, hell I'm almost melting in here too. it's 93 outside and the a/c has ran literally since I got up at 7am and has not shut off once. It's still 73 according to the thermostat. All freedom units for the euros, you can convert yourself if you want.

This house has extremely poor insulation.

>>81579911
Watching people play Rust together as a substitute for making friends sort of day.

>>81579956
Really? 73 is fucking cold (for my skinny ass)

The dancing has started at the wedding, I had to excuse myself to the patio because it was too loud and overwhelming in there. It's still 90 degrees out and I'm not even used to wearing a button down shirt and long pants, and I'm currently dying.

maybe you guys should all download sven co-op and play that together one of these days

>>81580141
I suck at 1st person shooters. Id rather play smash bros.

>>81580148
that's ok sven lets you play with like 20 other people so you don't have to be john wick to have fun :D

>>81580098

what? Are you a lizard or something? I'm quite hot at 73 and my comfortable temp is like 66-68.

I would be happy if if was just 40 degrees farenheit year round except for 20 in the winter so we could have snow.

I would be fine with a regular midwest summer just without these heatwaves and humidity but that's just part of living here.

>>81580197
No I'm just skinny and addicted to oxycodone.
I imagine being a lizard person would be cool tho, imagine having a slit to play with.

>>81580468
twink version of max payne

>>81559660 (OP)
The next anon who posts (below) has to get on his hands and knees and suck off everyone who has posted in this thread.

>>81579610
Good time to make them oink vocaroos like a good piggy

>>81579494
That's retarded. I'm too nervous to play with strangers because I don't know them. I'm comfortable around my friends so I can play with them.
>but you can do le wrong thing
They're my friends, they don't really care bakamoron
>>81579516
Most good games are single players...

>>81580468
When I was a kid I had an imaginary friend named slasher who was a cool bipedal lizard guy with big claws and muscles but he always wore a hoodie so you could only see the end of his snout, not his whole face. He would keep me company on long boring car trips by doing fun acrobatics outside the window along all the mile markers.

>>81581140
and you could actually see him?
Damn that's cool, I took the "talking to yourself when no one is around" route as a kid that carried over into adulthood.

>>81581172
I also do that too. Sometimes I refer to myself as "we" because it helps me get across the point to myself that my bad parts need to be punished.

>>81581183
I refer to myself as Borg, but that's neither here nor there.

I am once again asking you to call me a bad neet pig for I have gone to DQ for a tendies basket and a milkshake.

>>81581363
I love you and I love that you got DQ.
I got to have a very tasty slice of wedding cake and talk to my stepsister for the first time in years. She's so happy she finally married her e-gf and I hope I get a happy ending like her.

Dragon Quest 5 is my favorite DQ

Is it a good idea to keep in contact with a guy that says "baby twinks" turn him on?
To me it seems like a massive pedophile warning sign, I'm an adult obviously but it still rubs me the wrong way.

>>81581493
How old is this guy? It;s one thing to to want to fuck 18 year old twinks if you are 18-20 yourself but much past that wanting them for their age is pedo.

>>81581517
Don't remember the age exactly though it is around 20
What seemed off more to me was the term used and the description provided for it, I don't really give a fuck about guys wanting to bone me because I look young, but having them see me as a kid is not something I'm cool with.

>>81581566
baby gay is a term for a young guy who's legal and new to the gay community. Some gay conservative blogger/person got canceled for some comments he made about it which everyone took the wrong way.

Do you think people would be upset if I just tried to make friends at gay bars instead of hooking up?

>>81581635
No, but don't go in expecting much. Who knows maybe the gay bar scene is different because they have the apps for all their casual hookup needs.

>>81581607
He described a much younger version of a twink and the examples he sent me were questionably legal so I think I'll just turn him down, getting raped is probably not worth the coke he might share with me.

>>81581648
I hate being alive and liking men. The only way to find love is to whore myself out.

>>81581635
I would not consider the opinion of someone who would be offended over you not boning with them, if a "no" offends them that bad at this stage imagine how they'll react to that "no" when no one else is around to get help or intervene.
You can give it a shot, it might be centered around hook-ups (maybe I don't know how gay bars are) but that doesn't mean you can't do anything else with it.

>>81581695
You can post your country and see if an anon here lives close enough to you.
I know one guy from these threads that lives only about two hours away from where I'm at, and maybe it'll be a success story, maybe it won't, you may aswell try right?

This milkshake is fucking amazing. I am completely stuffed. I'm gonna gain some weight back probably.

Update: The cat is fine, my mom told me it was some other douchebag cats that were fighting. Saw him eating and accidentally scared him off while throwing out trash. I also found some pokemon cards in my attic my step father let me have.

>>81582471
They're all just mcdonalds shitter cards but I'll give them away at a little kids birthday party or something.

>>81582471
Glad to hear that the cat's alright. I actually saw two cats today neither wanted to be pet though

all of the 9 have been very sleepy today and laying under the fans trying to keep cool.

Does any else want a "best friend" husband? Like I want someone to just spend every moment of my life with and do everything together. But also love. I wish more twinks wanted to get married.

>>81576536
maybe get into racing games and get a steering wheel set up? you dont HAVE to race, i highly recommend a game called beamng. its a material/physics simulator forever early access title.

>>81583222
i fucked myself hard back in highschool with this. got into a long term relationship with a girl, found out i couldnt have sex with her, but still wanted to be with her? i decided that was it, this was it. if i STILL wanted to be with her forever after finding out i was probably never going to get to doink her? holy shit i thought i had something going on there. i thought i had accidentally walked into the perfect relationship/marriage/life.
it didnt pan out, but it was really fucking awesome while it was working. a best buddy for a gf, sex wasnt even thought about or a thing. just somebody i shared my entire life with, shared all my closest emotions and thoughts. man. it was pretty great for a little while there.

even after it was all done, all the horrible things we inadvertedly did to eachother, she STILL...still checked in on me. she had her own kid, a stable marriage, working on literally buying a house, and when we caught up she insisted on getting me alone, so we could talk, and she tried to subtly ask me what i did after we split, if i had moved on, found a different girl. damn. i fucked that one up hard.

straggots out

>>81583279
its just what i was doing at the time. i was already criminally gay at this point, but got distracted by the possibility of real, straight, normal sex. once we broke up, and i had suddenly all the time in the world and nothing to focus my dick at, it got weird fast. reallllly fuckin fast

how old are you now, straggot?

three hundred and forty years old, divided by ten

im still believing that my ebf will come back because thinking about the alternative hurts

how do I precum a little at a time?
maybe my dick is overtrained or sth, it's very much all or nothing coming out...

>>81583685
huh? what do you even mean. you just pre-cum all at once, a lot, and you were wishing you dribbled instead?

>>81583723
yes, exactly. what I have now is like maybe a drop gets out but that's all I manage, and then when I really try it just comes out in one big slosh, and it's a bit inconvenient and uncomfortable.

>>81583642
I wish this sometimes too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iCU_Y5u5Zs

>>81573790
hahaha
>sweet tooth
way wrong

>>81583222
i thought that was what a relationship is supposed to be

>>81583733
uh, how do you jerk it. it sorta sounds like some sorta death grip n rip

>>81584056
idk, maybe 40 minutes a day, and I'm not circumsized so I never got into using lube. I do remember that during one relationship my dick got more flexible even when erect for a while, in a nice way, but I didn't figure out what made the difference.

>>81584105
...how, not how long. not cut either, so uh. not sure where we are gong with this. status quo moment, fuck you faggot

>>81584105
any tightness?

whoever in this thread said a bottle of wine gets get you drunk i hope you get diarrhea or worse

>>81584249
wait for it. the sugar hits you later. the tannins fuck your shit

I stopped being hungry all the time but I don't know if I've just adjusted to barely eating comparitively, or if I've slipped a bit. I don't think I'm eating a lot again, but maybe I'm just so unhinged with being a fat fuck that I can't tell. Thank you for coming to my continued blog.

>>81584262
you like that artist as well? the weirder stuff? i have never seen anyone else post this artist, ever

>>81584298
I just save anything cute or hot with Zero. Playing X4 as a kid made me realize I was a homo.

>>81584262
mute mute mute mute

>>81584309
not x or anything. all zero?

testles images are not alllwered

>>81584322
X and Zero are cute together but there's something about cute boys with blonde hair, and X almost looks bald because he always has his helmet covering it all. Is there even official art of X with his hair visible?

>>81584257
im already 1 and 50/50 bottle f**k (You)

>>81584327
dunno. im an axl fag

>>81584329
what did he mean by this

I kinda wanna dye my hair grey / silver.

Would you do a boy with dyed hair?

>>81584339
im already near 2 bottles and (You) lied to me evil faggot

>>81584356
what did i do. 2 bottles in? are you okay?

>>81584355
It isn't a dealbreaker but it automatically puts you into a certain category.

>>81584355
im early thirties (its over), but i get so many whitehairs. everyone has salt and peppper . its so weitrd

>>81584364
yea, im okay. you led me on so i hope (You) suffer

>>81584384
how so? f this was orignal at all. i say

>>81584394
are you not the first mentioned anon? if not not f**k you! if yes fuck you!

>>81584408
lead you into what? anon find a comfy playlist and go to bed

>>81584428
lead me into a false sense of drunk security. im fully awake and nowhere near going out. apologize or forfeit your life

>>81584379
>tfw dangerously close to mid-30s as of 2 weeks ago
I'm going to kill myself.

>>81584213
yeah, like I've a few reflexes to not cum early and they're kinda abrupt. and there's a tight quality to my boners some of the time, not really comfortable. I also don't really sleep comfortably bc I'm pretty low on oxytocin usually.

>>81584465
what are you 35 or something

Worst posters list:
1. Pokemon gaygen normalfag bishit
2. Storyanon
3. Cuckbot
4. Brad
5. Meow
6. Lavender
7. Pxl
8. Every druggie posting here instead of drugfeel
9. Incestfags
10. Filefag

>>81583224

Oink Oink I'm not going to do it I'm so pathetic

>>81584558
is high number good or bad

>>81584558
is alcohol a drug? pls tell

>>81584355
Please validate this anon more or he will feel worthless because some internet randos wouldn't date someone like him

>>81584580
Obviously bad
>>81584586
Yes

Some days I have so much going on I completely forget to get horny and fap

>>81584630
how do i officially submit my druggie lvl to /r9gay/

nobody on /r9gay/ has done drugs just admit it

I had a thc gummy a couple times and I tried dried mushrooms once. The mushrooms were terrible and I ate them with peanut butter and I couldn't eat peanut butter for months because it ruined it for me for a while.

>>81584663
Same yay but isn't that a good thing

>>81584663
i have a new crush and i think he likes me too
im not sure how much i should i leave up to him, but we have had 2 '"dates'" so far

all norms need to die before evacuating this thread. quickly!

>>81585113
Sorry, I got my bf but I still can't leave here. You're going to need to cope with me staying.

>>81585125
you didnt but when you do you or more likely your bf will need to walk off a bridge

>>81585172
Please post more coherently, anon.

>>81584558
Made it back on the list again hell yes 8).

>>81585175
whats incoherent about that

>>81584847
Yay it's great, having things to do you enjoy doing is so much better yay yaaaaaaaaay

Meow where pekka eric auvinen bf meow waaah

Should I kill mysrlf, eat dinner, or masturbate to completion today bros?

>>81581635
just so you know, you're asking a bunch of people who have never been to a bar before. Gincels here are the only ones who would get mad at you for doing something with your frigid dating life. People irl won't care because you're not the main character

>>81581695
That's just wrong on many levels. Not only you can find love without whoring yourself out, there's nothing wrong with whoring yourself out.
You got some issues with accepting your sexuality, it's clear to see

>>81583262
>gay celibate blown away by the concept of having a friend
You really thought she was your ticket out of fag ville, didn't you? You poor thing.
You never gave a man a chance to love you like you gave that girl

>>81584938
>2 '"dates'"
Why "dates"? Was it all online?

>>81584558
i dont know any of these

>>81586164
You should try dating apps before killing yourself. You don't want to die a virgin

>>81586164
see picturesque related

>>81586248
more like virginville, but, yeah

>>81586299
Hi Hue, how are you doing? Good to see you again so soon.
>>81586318
There were 3 things stupid idiot.

>>81586342
huh? whats the difference between masturbating to completion and killing yourself?

>>81586339
>It was really fucking awesome
>A sexless teen relationship with someone you're not attracted to
Both of you deserve better. Your mistake is not letting other gay men anywhere near you

Two weeks ago I finally decided to take the advice I got here and try dating apps for once. While it wasn't an easy decision to follow through I still did it and I have no regrets. Yes I had to ignore a lot of unsolicited dick pics but I also got real messages from humans. One of them I eventually got close enough to go on a date with. Then another one. And now he is my boyfriend. Just wanted to let you guys know that you can do this too. Happy to say I'm no longer a sad virgin but a happy bfhaver I always wanted to be.

>>81586348
Oh so kindly I say to you:
Anon... I...

My blog:
Didn't have a second of sleep today, was in my head too much. Woke up. Had a quick sad wank. Ruined another pair of undies. Still sensitive. Had a full-body experience and felt even more tired throught the day. The pressure of being an ugly dysgenic bottom hit especially hard today, hate interracting with and being seen by people. Head home soon and gonna think about what can I still do with the cards that I was given. Solitude and societal expectations/norms starting getting to me: wish I had a bf to be grounded and adequate with, but I will never be good often and just gotta take it. That's all. Wanna go watch the new 28 movie.
>>81586164
>masturbate to completion
I did it already.
>kill mysrlf
On my bucket list.

>>81586455
>finally decided to take the advice I got here
What are you talking about, the only advice you get from this place is to passively wait for your perfect soul mate and do nothing sexual in real life otherwise you risk becoming a whore

>>81586455
Incoming replies:
>liar
>hue propaganda
>what dating app bro
>normalfag OUT
>top or bottom?

>>81586462
Can't you just like be a top instead?

>>81586455
good job anon. what kinda guy is he?

>>81586467
I don't visit this thread much so maybe you're right but I also saw posts talking about dating apps like hinge and grindr here more than few times

>>81586483
Dick not big enough, sorry, especially for a guy my height.

>>81586532
Micro penis? Anything more than 5 inches is enough. Bottoms be desperate nowadays

>>81586490
Kind and charming, surprisingly romantic given my expectations. We both like marvel movies a lot so we spent a lot of our first date talking about that. He kept complimenting me which made me blush and I awkwardly tried to compliment his well groomed beard and blue eyes.

>>81586462
Ah yes and I also ate yesterday and ruined my three day fast on it's second day, so now I have to do this all over again.
>>81586548
I wanted to argue that it's small not micro, but you've said it and proved my point.

>>81586628
>three day fast
Why on earth would you do that, are you fat?

>>81586642
Yes. And I'm mad and sad and hangry, and when I get depressed I stop eating. This will make me prettier...

I need you gay faggots to book one same resort and will come together and fix each other every night

hytale just got canceled and i still have no bf
im gonna kill myself

woke up and still mad about the wine

time to sleep away another hot afternoon.

need to bf to go away somewhere cool with.

i wish i had a tall bf
i hate having a size kink :c

>>81588319
I have a small bf fetish, wanna get married?

>>81588330
noooo im completely and totally worthless

>>81588353
yea fair enough then

>>81588362
yep, that's that

>>81588235
I passed out multiple times on the road trip home, not because of heat, but because I was just so sleepy. It was also really hot though, I got all sticky. Taking a shower when I got home and laying down from a nap in the basement feels like heaven and I need a boy to snuggle with.

Got a egg with double yolks I wonder how rare that is

>>81588319
>only average 190cm/6'2

Would you be mad if your bf trooned out in your relationship

>>81588514
im 170cm, thats very tall compared to me

>>81588527
If a bi top bf transitioned they would prob become a transbian that would especially piss me off a lot I think :/

>>81588527
I would probably see it coming

>>81588514
I'm 195 and I'm pretty average in my cunt.

>>81588460
It's a sign from God your soulmate is near

>>81586462
>Ruined another pair of undies
How?
>>81587606
That's called grindr you hoe
>>81587818
>this faggot has been talking about this sit game for years
Get another hobby retard

>>81588319
>>81588353
>r9gay try not to self sabotage challenge impossible

>>81588527
I would consider it a personal failing I didn't notice before becoming bfs

>>81588527
depends if shes cute

I got tired and bored after my ran I just walked few laps and went back home. I just didn't feel like doing anything more. Now I feel mentally spent for some reason.

I saw a few cute bottoms on Grindr but I'm too commitmentphobic to send them a message and maybe lose my virginity

>>81588681
Depresso steelix

>>81588758
is a one night diq appointment a big commitment?
You can just send one message and be upfront about it being just a "for fun" thing, worst case scenario you don't get a reply
be respectful about it though and accept the word "no", If a guy says he already wanked today and isn't in the mood don't say "well you can still give head" that implies you don't give a shit about the other person.

virginity is my shield and banner if i saw you normalfags in real life it would also be my sword

>>81588909
I lost my virginity to a bf though, we were both virgins for guys so I think it's the best way I could've went about it.
I'm wondering if it's a surprise or not suprising at all that he never had a bf before me because he had a monstrous cock.
We're not dating anymore but we're still good friends because we're both autistic.

>>81588941
so you lost your virginity and instantly your bf dropped you

>>81588941
Tell me more about his cock

>>81589040
No, his libido was too high for me to the point it made me loathe spending time with him, we both agreed it'd be better to go back to being friends so we can find other guys better suited for our needs.
>>81589056
He had an enormous horse huge triple XXXLLLLLL cunt obliterator, hurt way too much so I never bottomed.

>>81588608
Had a huge stain, didn't wash it properly, now it's may be set in fabric :(

just came hands free again, I love being a bottom!

my penis is pretty big actually

>>81588894
well to me it is
>be upfront about it being just a "for fun" thing
good one!
I tried once and while we had fun no one got penetrated and only the other guy came (which I was fine with bc I did really enjoy it), and we were at it for like 4 hours at least
>don't say "well you can still give head"
topkek, I wouldn't
I'm more the kind to put pressure on myself to perform

nothing good in family stays good for long. so im going to dwell in my sadness for at least another day and then maybe try and pick myself up. good evening however nonnies.

>>81589154
how do you get past how painful it is? anytime I get penetrated it feels slightly nice but also hurts so much the top immediately pulls out due to seeing me in pain and can't do it again due to getting turned off by that.

stop making up gross stories its not 2007 anymore

>>81587606
i can't be fixed unless riley comes back to life

i can't be fixed unless thomas comes back to life

>>81588772
Possibly :(
Going to eat, shower and shave maybe I feel better after that

>>81589175
use more lube, practice with smaller things then work your way up

alright, it's time to get a bf!

>>81589154
This is so retarded and gay die

>>81589226
Normalfags and normalfag LARPers got way too comfortable in this general

>>81589407
:(
why should I die just because I used a toy on myself?

my one true chance at love, gone, just like that

>>81589106
Dumbass I need length/girth estimates

>>81589511
I didn't measure it but imagine it being as long as a monster can and as girthy as a 0,25 liter can.

>>81589534
I dated this guy in melbourne with a similar size, he could never keep it up though

I'm a prettyboy asain like picrel (not actually mine). I have to do it to have any chance with women (as asian).
But no women will date me.
Shuold I gay?
But I don't want to be the women gay but man gays.

>>81589552
It's way too big of a size anyways, sex is too uncomfortable or painful.
It feels like a curse sometimes too since I always land big dicked guys.

>>81589552
nta but i always had that problem with my ex, it's time to put it in but i'm too big and floppy to push through the hole. i had to spend so much time stretching him out and getting fluffed up before it would even work mechanically that it made the sex kind of bad.