You wake up with the powers of superman - /r9k/ (#81663268) [Archived: 626 hours ago]

Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:50:05 AM No.81663268
superman
superman
md5: 13e6db49bb9a2e696701cf901c996bcf🔍
What now, anon?
Replies: >>81663275 >>81663286 >>81663300 >>81663302 >>81663304 >>81663309 >>81663314 >>81663317 >>81663335 >>81663338 >>81663342 >>81663349 >>81663375 >>81663379 >>81663381 >>81663421 >>81663445 >>81663476 >>81663900 >>81663913 >>81663916 >>81663971 >>81663972 >>81663999
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:50:37 AM No.81663275
>>81663268 (OP)
I super rape ur mom

xd
Replies: >>81663314
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:52:13 AM No.81663286
>>81663268 (OP)
Hop on WoW, go to work and contemplate suicide like I do everyday probably
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:53:37 AM No.81663300
1742638390201004668
1742638390201004668
md5: 1007ecc00fd2ef5cfbfa1ac79376283e🔍
>>81663268 (OP)
Rob a bank for weed money then go back home and play vidya everyday
Replies: >>81663394
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:53:37 AM No.81663301
find kryptonite and kill myself for being the most boring superhero ever
Replies: >>81663308 >>81663392
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:54:10 AM No.81663302
>>81663268 (OP)
global male dictatorship
Replies: >>81663394 >>81663431
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:54:20 AM No.81663304
>>81663268 (OP)
I would fix this world so fast
Replies: >>81663394
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:54:33 AM No.81663308
>>81663301
there is no kryptonite on earth dum dum
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:54:34 AM No.81663309
>>81663268 (OP)
Immediately hunt down all the niggery foids that pretend to be femcels on here and fly them into the sun 1 at a time, then once ive done that with all of them i become a benevolent detached savior who interjects with humanity only to forcibly stop any and all world ending threats but otherwise letting them live as they see fit
Replies: >>81663394 >>81663431
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:55:09 AM No.81663314
>>81663268 (OP)
I'll protect this world from the mean dudes, and alongside the government, I would kill >>81663275 before he can rape other people.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:55:27 AM No.81663317
>>81663268 (OP)
I do what I always do
Write code and smoke weed
Being an alien can't change who I am
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:55:59 AM No.81663323
Kill myself. I hate noise enough as it is. Supes can hear everything that goes on on Earth.
Replies: >>81663375 >>81663392
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:58:04 AM No.81663335
>>81663268 (OP)
I would do super hero things. But i would wear a shirt with a swastika on it and insist everyone calls me Naziman
Replies: >>81663431
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:58:26 AM No.81663338
>>81663268 (OP)
contemplate what to do with these powers. do i become this world's god or do i fuck off and leave them to their own devices?...hey wait a minute, didnt a superman movie already tackle this topic?
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 3:59:34 AM No.81663342
1749843749063824
1749843749063824
md5: d415ad58b51404731419808f263af57e🔍
>>81663268 (OP)
Direction: Israel
Replies: >>81663384 >>81663394 >>81663441
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:00:24 AM No.81663349
thinking pepe
thinking pepe
md5: 3b7eb9267d5d554f7e905bd838c8d0c6🔍
>>81663268 (OP)
Honestly, I would first go to my local forest where nobody ever comes to test out my powers first upon noticing them like breaking off the door handle when I wake up or something. I would "train" for about a month to get exact control of them. Then go to my local shooting range and test wether im bullet proof by letting the bullet graze the side of my finger.

Once I know im bullet proof I would drop everything in my life and go into the army or whatever mercenary group there is that will hire people easily. Its the only reliable and realisitc way to see just how much my body can take, sneak out at night to step on a landmine, try to tank a tank shot, try to see if gernades can hurt me. Once I TRULY figure out my limit I would put on a crown of thorns, fly to the white house and larp as black jesus PURELY to piss off the retards who genuinely believe jesus was some white guy and tell everyone 90% of them are going to hell and then I would fly back home and shitpost here again.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:06:19 AM No.81663375
>>81663268 (OP)
uhhh...flex my superpowerful kegel muscles and see if I can cut a skyscraper in half with piss
>>81663323
like all the time, he can't tune it out? imagine being able to hear the sounds of everyone fuckin at once, everyone killing each other, babies crying and shit
Replies: >>81663382 >>81664019
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:08:10 AM No.81663379
>>81663268 (OP)
I reclaim my people's lands.
Replies: >>81663394 >>81663441
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:08:35 AM No.81663381
>>81663268 (OP)
Totalitarianism and torture everyone who's rich and snubbish, kill corporate chefs
Replies: >>81663394 >>81663441
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:08:37 AM No.81663382
>>81663375
He can tune it out, anon is just a retard who never read the comic books
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:08:46 AM No.81663384
images (4) (21)
images (4) (21)
md5: e6f617c59d61c07a2b73ece4be97d362🔍
>>81663342
>"Drop a nuke on Tel Aviv"
>"What but they're our greatest ally"
>"Just do it"
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:10:24 AM No.81663392
>>81663323
>>81663301
No Kryptonite in our universe. Your only hope of KYSing would be to find a red sun somewhere out in space
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:10:41 AM No.81663394
>>81663300
>>81663302
>>81663304
>>81663309
>>81663342
>>81663381
>>81663379
This is why nobody likes you, they know deep down you would behave like an animal given a smidge of power
Replies: >>81663400 >>81663403 >>81664034
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:13:17 AM No.81663400
pepe-laughing-pepe-braces
pepe-laughing-pepe-braces
md5: 5a9a44b00918cc35394e666ef2423c6c🔍
>>81663394
>He thinks normies aren't sadistic by nature
Get a load of this guy
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:14:56 AM No.81663403
>>81663394
>Literally selflessly saving the world
>"Oh my god you monsters! This is why nobody likes you!"
Replies: >>81663412
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:16:03 AM No.81663412
>>81663403
tell us mr hero, how would you save the world?
Replies: >>81663431 >>81663441
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:18:14 AM No.81663421
>>81663268 (OP)
Fly over to Israel and destroy their nuclear arsenal, then destroy the IDF. Then go home, dropping Benjamin Netanyahu off at the Hague on the way, and eat a burger knowing Israel can't murder unarmed women and children anymore.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:20:12 AM No.81663431
>>81663412
Ahem, see:
>>81663302
>>81663309
>>81663335
1/2
Replies: >>81663444
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:21:13 AM No.81663441
>>81663412
And also
>>81663342
>>81663379
>>81663381
2/2
Replies: >>81663444
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:21:52 AM No.81663444
>>81663431
>>81663441
That's how you'd save the world? Wew
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:22:10 AM No.81663445
>>81663268 (OP)
I would superprocrastinate all the day along
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 4:29:55 AM No.81663476
tired
tired
md5: b16b0fc2d4a7fa768f181d1fc3697b7a🔍
>>81663268 (OP)
>You wake up with the powers of Superman, what now anon?
Knowing me I'd spend several months mulling over what my superhero costume should look like and never get anything done. Eventually I'd probably just end up like Dr. Manhattan from The Watchmen and go and live on Mars.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:34:45 AM No.81663900
1744261088434158
1744261088434158
md5: a001d62a4c74553c4174b25c842e728c🔍
>>81663268 (OP)
Start LARPing as Goku
>"But you have Superman's powe-"
Still LARPing as Goku
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:36:17 AM No.81663913
>>81663268 (OP)
Become God Emperor of Earth.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:36:41 AM No.81663916
>>81663268 (OP)
Would sentry>ares many people
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:36:52 AM No.81663920
Figure out who goes on 4chan/sharty and kill every single last user
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:43:43 AM No.81663971
>>81663268 (OP)
leave earth and never come back or kill all jews on one of those info charts but honestly the first one
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:43:49 AM No.81663972
>>81663268 (OP)
I don't find out for a few days because I hardly go outside.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:47:44 AM No.81663999
>>81663268 (OP)
actually solve crime by eliminating corporate America and use my laser-eyes on Isra*l
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:48:22 AM No.81664003
rZhKb1u
rZhKb1u
md5: 8bf42d6a93836fdde84b92c1366caa19🔍
We already know how it'll end up
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:50:14 AM No.81664019
>>81663375
Superman can hear somebody crying for help on earth when hes several star systems away and fly back there in time to help
>but sound isn't fast enough to travel such great distances
>but sound doesn't travel through space
Superman can lift a book with infinite pages.
Superman sucks. Hes too strong.
Anonymous
6/30/2025, 5:51:43 AM No.81664034
>>81663394
Superman's powerset is far more than a smidge of power. It is enough to ignore and dominate the entire planet with no fear.