I got caught masturbating at work again

Why the fuck are you jacking off at work?

>>81715957
I have a routine where before work, I'll masturbate at least once (usually twice). However, I was in a hurry today and couldn't relive myself so I was backed up the whole day. Couldn't take it anymore so I tried to sneak one in until my roastie coworker caught me

>>81716011
go to the toilet and do it there dumbass

>>81716011
But you mention
>again
Not only was is disgusting enough that you did it at work, but you did it twice. Then you have the gall to call your co-worker a roastie when you were the one caught jacking off. You deserve everything that will happen to you.

For the first ten months of my job I never understood why guys leave loads in front of the toilet instead of in it. Then one day, during a particularly frustrating jackoff session I wondered if it'd be any easier to just sit down and pump off on the toilet seat, so I did just that. When it felt it cumming, I stood up, mid-orgasm in an attempt to turn around and aim at the toilet, but in doing so I tripped on my tight pants and shot all over the place. That was the first time I ever had an actual cumshot, and it was completely accidental.

>>81716179
>ever had an actual cumshot
what? so what do you usually have ??

>>81716272
Not that anon, but obviously his cum just didn't shoot out like a projectile the other times he jerked off, which is why he had the expectation others should be able to jerk off into the center of the toilet instead of missing it.
Same idea as a sneeze that launches mucus far away from you vs. a sneeze where mucus just stays close to your nose.

>>81715944 (OP)
kek
Hope you got fired

>>81716140
She deserves to be called more than a roastie
the bitch has always had something against me
calling me "weird", complaining about my lunch in the breakroom, never accepting my follow requests
I'm sick of that shit