vent post

>29 khv
>last year decided to give a genuine effort to find a gf
>lost a lot of weight, still fat but not morbidly obese anymore
>started grooming myself better (got new clothes, get regular haircuts and shave weekly, etc)
>still socially autistic but never figured i'd fix that anyway
>tried dating sites but its mostly single moms and ugly/fat girls (i refuse to lower my standards), any girls that did give me a chance for a first date either ghosted me immediately after or just said they're not interested in going on another
>just kept on "working on myself :)" but losing hope so just focus on my job thinking maybe i'll get lucky and meet someone naturally or something
>new girl gets hired at my company and put on my crew (i work in construction)
>fit tomboy short hair, super cute and easy to talk to which surprised me since i've never been able to talk to cute girls without getting anxiety before
>thought she was just being friendly at first didn't want to risk a sexual harassment complaint so just kept my talks with her to idle chit chat
>start noticing that whenever our crew went to a bar after work she'd always sit next to me and talk to me the entire time
>last week she was showing me pictures of her in a bikini from when she was at a beach for memorial day
>this has to mean something theres no way she's just being friendly right?
>asked her what she's doing for 4th of july figure it'd be a safe question if she doesn't have any big plans might be able to get myself invited and if she has no plans could ask her to watch fireworks with me
>"Oh, anon's family is having a big BBQ so i'm going there"
>only person who I know with that name is someone from another crew, ask if that's who she means
>"Yeah, I was on their crew for a few days before getting put on this one we just started dating a few weeks ago :)"

the other dude is a pudgy gamer like me and if she was on my crew first i think i couldve actually gotten her as a gf its making me want to kms

Damn. I feel like my life is full of near misses like that too, shitsux

>>81727525 (OP)
Maintain a friendship with her, eventually see if she's got any single friends she can hook you up with. Social connections are how you get a gf and social connections with women usually lead to social connections with more women.

>>81727634
thats my current plan is just wait and hope he fucks it up, hes not a bad guy we've talked about niche games like CDDA before

i feel like i dick hoping he fucks it up, but before just talking to her would be a huge mood booster to my day but i feel like when i go back to work monday im just gonna be sad instead since now i cant stop fantasizing about what could (and im praying could still) be

>>81727525 (OP)
just another case of men being stacy only as always

>>81727634
thats my current plan is just wait and hope he fucks it up, hes not a bad guy we've talked about niche games like CDDA and niche-to-normie games like HoMM before

i feel like a dick hoping he fucks it up, but before just talking to her would be a huge mood booster to my day but i feel like when i go back to work monday im just gonna be sad instead since now i cant stop fantasizing about what could have been / could possibly still be

sounds like a terrible fate bro.
at least you have the courage to keep trying
I'm a 34 khv and I don't even think I'll ever try to date

>>81727794
what makes it worse is that my other coworkers say shit like "she talks too much, i wonder if she talks that much during sex maybe we can ask anon" and it makes me want to cry but i have to just laugh along with them

>>81727838
i hate when normies make sex jokes

>>81727634
what he said. OP is making progress and now knows there are women looking for someone like him.

>>81727525 (OP)
had me until you said ugly girls lol go kill yourself you retard incel all moids want stacies your looksmatch is a downsyndromed ethiopian

>>81727876
i dont need a 10/10 but if im not physically attracted to a person at all i dont see how i could have a longterm relationship with them, same reason why i decided to lose weight i cant blame girls for not wanting to date me when i was almost 300 pounds unless they have a fat fetish

>>81727876
I'm physically fit and not too ugly and I just want someone similar. Not many woman want to be fit.

I wonder what a legit recovery path for a 30ish yo loser virgin looks like

I'm not even tryin to be doomer but it just seems like the odds are really stacked against someone like that

>>81727941
im trying really hard to improve myself, losing weight and looking like a normal person is the easy part, just got an exercise bike and some weights and go on runs which ive started liking

the hard part is trying to change myself to be less bitter and the really hard part is trying to fix my social autism i still sperg out when talking to women which is why i was so crushed when i found out i just a few weeks too late to date this girl since she is legit the first girl ive ever been able to talk to without feeling stressed/anxious in my entire life who isnt related to me

>>81727876
lmao, fucking relax bitch. All people want someone they're attracted to. What's the point if there's no attraction?

>>81728068
>fix my social autism i still sperg out when talking to women

can you share more about what you mean by this. i think i have the same problem.

i hate small talk and I don't know how to flirt. and by hate small talk I mean even tho I know it's socially important it feels like I'm dumbing myself down to talk to a child or something.

like idk how to make sexual remarks without acting like a creep. I legit feel like a robot cuz I'd rather be like beep boop affirmative your boobies are nice

i bet it''s bitterness for me too. I'm just bitter I have to adapt to society instead of the other way around.

>>81727525 (OP)
Had the near exact same thing happen to me too. Shit fucking sucks. I just distanced myself.

>>81728129
as autistic as it sounds my strategy is i just listen to what my coworkers talk like/about while we're having dinner after work at a bar and try to imitate it (forman is a cool guy usually buys us dinner and drinks once a week)

im still not very good at it since most of my coworkers grew up on a farm so they usually talk about mechanical stuff like fixing cars/tractors, welding, etc or just talk about sports which im also not really into

i have gotten better at small talk since working here though i used to be completely silent until someone pointed it out and theyre nice enough that they started engaging in conversations with me more but if its not something work related i really cant find a way to join the conversations since my interests are mainly video games, anime, internet culture, tabletop minis painting, etc so i just try my best to not sound like a spaz

getting a job in construction is the only reason i even have the balls to try to get out of my comfort zone to get a gf, when i first started 8 years ago i had to ask other people to park a company pickup truck into tight spaces, kept being promoted to the point that i operate the big machines and am in charge if the forman is offsite for whatever reason probably because im one of the only people in the company that doesnt have a DUI, does/did hard drugs, and has no criminal record even the 2 brothers that own the company know me on a first name basis i legit never expected myself to be where i am i always thought i'd be a cubicle monkey when i was a kid

>>81727525 (OP)
self-replying but having this recent disappointment on my mind while visiting my family for 4th of july only reinforced my primal lust for a gf/wife it hit me really hard when i was helping my mom with dinner (no im not into momcest) but the idea of cooking dinner with a girl who is yours and you are hers just hit me like a fucking truck i had to put in effort to not show sadness on my face while helping my mom make dinner just thinking of how happy i would be if i had a significnat other to spend my days with

sometimes after a week of hard work its really nice to come home to quiet apartment, other times the silence is deafening to the point i end up breaking open a bottle of suntori to try to ignore it, i dont consider myself an alcoholic i only drink 2 or 3 times a month but when i drink i usually drink an entire bottle of whiskey in 1 night (and tonight is one of those)

i dont need some 10/10 perfect wife who has no flaws i just want another human being (female) that can share my joy in good times and sadness in bad times. it would be so nice to come home to have someone i care for and cares for me being there, rather than just every single friday come home to a dark, silent apartment

fuck normies who take female companionship for granted i legitamitely cannot understand that mindset of having someone who lives with you, being there for you and you just bitch about them while at work (majority of my coworkers just bitching about their wives like having a companion is some sort of detriment to their existence)

>>81727525 (OP)
>is fat
>refuses to date fat girls
hypocritical fatty kys

>81728363
i might but in my defense im still in the process of losing weight, i was 295 pounds last year currently 210 and 5'7" if i see a fat girl thats actively also in the process of losing weight i'll go for it but i'm doing my best to get into shape i dont see why i should get into a relationship with someone my age who is fat and doing nothing about it, i have low self-esteem but im also egotistical in that sense

also i feel like if i get into a serious relationship with a fat girl it will make me lose my drive to get into shape

>>81728129
Since getting a gf I don't care about social stuff anymore, helps that she's a sperg too. I have no interest in talking to normies about normie stuff. I can't really help you with that since I lucked out. She was the one who initiated with me, I just happened to be at right place right time

>>81727769
There's nothing wrong with wishing for someone elses downfall. Men are naturally competitive after all.
Hell, I hope YOU fuck things up with this chick. I would kill for a cute tomboy gf, lol.

>>81727876
>t.obese internet addicted whore with flabby boobs