Thread 81875083

Why the fuck do I not get any real advice when I ask where to go make friends and meet girls? All I get is generic shit like bars, clubs, and hobbies. I.E. shit I've already done and wouldn't be asking if they worked.

Or some vague shit like "be yourself". Therapy wasn't any different. It was all vague bullshit, shit I've already done but gotten no results, or the same empty platitudes I've been hearing since middle school. Or they try to gaslight you into thinking you're the problem when you tell them their crappy advice doesn't work.

Why does anyone give any legitimate advice on this subject? Is it all just a game of luck?

>>81875083 (OP)
>Why does anyone give any legitimate advice on this subject?
Because none exists lol

>>81875083 (OP)
you can meet women literally everywhere you go you retard but those generic answers are the places where you can get a woman with the lowest effort
captcha SAY S8

Nowadays there's meetup.com. That's where one of my friends met her bf. Just find a hobby you like.

Can also join a martial arts gym. Probably wont meet any girls but you can at least make friends that way. Dancing class used to be the move but that has been patched, as have running clubs. Rock climbing and crossfit have cute girls in them.

Also the reality is that most people don't make a huge effort into their social life, it just happens for them which is why they give you shit advice. Like women are terrible at how to do pickup shit because they've never had to learn. Autists don't have that natural socialization skill so they struggle with basic shit everyone knows and doesn't care to break down and explain.

>>81875109
Meetup.com has been fucking dead for years. Nobody who suggests that shit site has actually used it in years.

>>81875083 (OP)
Jesus loves you so much anon

no, the problem is in you, not in what you do, the way you look and I'm sure it's disgusting, the way you dress and the way you behave

Maybe for you it's normal but for others it's not, fortunately you don't fit into society, you're just an outcast and a genetic error

>>81875122

If you're in a major city it's still active. Also there are Facebook and IG groups of similar things.

>>81875128
I'm a completely fucking normal person who just wants a social circle. I've been to therapy, and they found nothing wrong with me. So the problem can't be me.

>>81875083 (OP)
i have never gotten a single good piece of advice on this site, or from IRL normalfags for that matter

If you can't get girls the normal way you can't get girls full stop. There is no secret.

>>81875139
of course it can, you're just avoiding it, you don't want to look for a problem in yourself, but it exists, most likely you weren't honest with the therapist, people like you tend to avoid the truth

>>81875177
I was completely honest with the therapist. I told them I was lonely and wanted friends. So they told me how to make friends.

I've been trying it for over a decade, and it hasn't worked once.

>>81875192
Don't fall for bait, brocel.

It's a huge issue that society just refuses to acknowledge for some reason. It could be fixed in a day if we just acknowledged it.

>>81875192
so what conclusion should we draw? where could the fucking problem be if not in you, please think about it

>>81875227
>45% of women are lonely
impossible when im right here

>>81875234
If 61% of the population are all having the exact same problem, then by definition, it can't be them that's at fault

>>81875227
You know what is on the fall for Gen Z? Is believing in God. People are lonely when they are disconnected from Christ. He loves you Anon. He loves all the Anons

>>81875248
There is no reason to believe in God anymore.

>>81875244
no they can, I already said they are outcasts, they just don't fit into society, they don't belong here, they probably just don't have communication skills
look at how you talk to me, you just can't understand the obvious

>>81875262
Yes there is Anon. He loves you and wants you to be saved.

>>81875244
>if 61% of people choose to have a bad lifestyle, then it's not their fault
It's their fault. This has happened many times in history. The people who learn to make good choices have better life outcomes. Sometimes they also choose to take control over the lives of losers and that percentage of losers goes down, but any loser can go outside and start to build relationships if they care for themselves too. The OP isn't spending time outside, he spends time alone, so he learns only how to be alone.

>>81875083 (OP)
>where to go make friends
>anyone give any legitimate advice on this subject?
Here's my question anon. Do you really like people? I had to literally work haard to keep people away from me. I had to be rude, making excuses, blocking numbers, etc. You can make friends literally anywhere.
You go to the supermarket, you see some guy working there, then you ask him LITERALLY ANYTHING "hot in here isn't it?" "Where do they keep the raisins?"
Just ask a random person some questions. have a legitimate conversation. There! You have a friend.
I suppose you are going to reply with "noooo I want super best friends who have the same tastes as me and love the things I love" what do you love? Go to where the things you love are and meet the people with your similar tastes.
There's just no way you have a difficult time making friends, anon. You're not interested in people and are denying for some reason.

Anybody here interested in paying to have a friend? I fucking hate people, but for some cash? baby, I'm your pal.
I'll teach you how to cook, I'll play air hockey and connect 4, I can friendly roast you and I will aways have a positive attitude and a smile in my face.
I can even travel to meet you

>>81875623
>I fucking hate people, but for some cash? baby, I'm your pal.
That is the funniest shit I have read on /r9k/ in a while.

>>81875227
I refuse to believe those stats since normies will say they're so lonely because they haven't fucked in a week

>>81875083 (OP)
Bcuz there is not any actual advice. Social circles for adults have been intentionally ruined over the years and there are basically none left now.

>>81875807
Social circles for adults are still based. They just exclude grown children who are cringe. I would never tell someone who is as pessimistic and retarded as OP how to form or join a community.

>>81875083 (OP)
To make buddies you join hobby groups (this advice often offered for gf, it's fake but works for buddies)
To get gf grow up up some height and inch on your chin.

>>81875278
>>81875561
>>81875815
>losers on the loser board pretending they're not losers episode 387

>>81876413
calm down everyone already knows it
you wanted attention bitch u get it

>>81875561
I go outside every fucking day.

>>81875575
You can't make friends with store employees. They're there to work, not to socialize.

I'm also not looking for friendships based solely on a shared hobby. I had those and they were unfulfilling.

>>81875561
Friendlessness has been on the rise for decades. If it was that easy, that wouldn't be the case.

>>81876479
>most legible ESL post award
>>81876547
Oh no, you don't get it, you have to kiss people's asses, and listen to their problems like some kind of therapist, and spend valuable time and resources on them that you could be spending on something that actually deserves your time and energy.
If you don't, you're a creepy shut-in who deserves to be thrown into the incel death camps.

>>81876561
>You can't make friends with store employees
Says who? You absolutely can. We are all humans and you can be friends, date and fuck whoever you want.
Maybe that's the reason you have such a hard time making friends? You think there are rules preventing you from doing so?
You see somebody working under the sun, you think offering a cold glass of water will intervine in some made up bullshit social ruling?
>I'm also not looking for friendships based solely on a shared hobby
Well then wtf you want? A cosmic asserted blood transfusion friendship? Yeah bro. I hate having friends that I can relate to and have things in common.

>>81876770
When I'm in the mood to socialize, a store is not where I go. Nobody goes to stores to socialize. They go to places that are actually designed for meeting people and making new friends.

>>81876547
You haven't been outside yet if you think people are a rare thing in the world. We have an overpopulation crisis. It's impossible just to go to a normal gym without waiting on weights or equipment.

>>81876592
You can rationalize it all you want. Humans who breathe oxygen, eat food, and take shits have a natural desire and all the natural capabilities to make friends any time they want, almost anywhere in the world. Nearly every part of your brain evolved around interacting with people; you're doing it right now through a far more complex and abstract mechanism than you ever would in personal relationships. It's a choice, and many people are fooled into making the "easy" and stupid choice of never maturing and learning adult/nuanced social skills etc. but it's still their fault as long as they have self awareness.

>>81876855
If the majority are having the exact same problem, it can't be them that's at fault

It's not people that changed, the world did

>>81876606
>incels are nonbinary lgbt radfem communist two-spirit anti-fascists
bet.

>>81876821
What do you gain by lying? Birth rates I'm first world nations have dropped to extinction levels. Everything is empty. When I went to the gym, it was empty as fuck.

>>81876874
If it was a problem then there would be people who would try to solve it. These guys who choose to be alone do it on purpose; it's their fault.

>>81875575
If he didn't like people, he wouldn't be asking for advice, retard

>>81876888
There hasn't been an empty gym in over 100 years. The population is the largest it has ever been in history, with only some retard countries slightly leveling out.

>>81876897
Nobody is choosing to be alone, you fucking retard. Nobody chooses that.

>>81876914
The people who spend time alone are obviously choosing to be alone.

>>81876909
Gen Z is the smallest generation in history

>>81876855
The brain absolutely didn't evolve to meet strangers in the city. Look at how Amazonian tribes treat strangers.

>>81876802
Simply not true for once. Humans don't have "designated friendship areas".
Second, you say "in the mood to socialize" sure, most people have moods. But does it bother you that a person haven't shown up EXACTLY when you are feeling like? If somebody approached you and you are not in the mood, will you at least make an effort to be their friend, since you want a friend?
I'm still thinking you just don't like people

>>81876925
Oh I was talking about overpopulation. If you're gen z it's actually easier to socialize for obvious reasons, no cap

>>81876916
They spent time alone because they have nobody to spend it with, not because they want to be alone.

>>81876904
It's called denial, genius

>>81876947
Fewer people makes socialization harder. Most of Gen Z are only children and grew up in neighborhoods with no other kids their age.

>>81876914
FUCKING WRONG
>>81876950
stop replying lil bro, that's embarassing

>>81876934
1. you don't have to meet "strangers" in a city, you creepazoid
2. you are proving me right if you are currently communicating with me on a phone/computer. the only change you need to make is to value companionship over being argumentative

>>81876950
They have the majority of people they can spend it with, according to your own false premise. They choose to spend their time alone. Even in the most generous case where I assume you have an IQ of 5, you can still spend time with other morons who will tolerate you being near them.

>>81876958
That's why they all live in neighborhoods with kids their age now. Nobody who wants a girlfriend stays in a neighborhood with kids of other ages.

>>81876977
Fucking retard, the majority of people age 15 and up spend the majority of their time alone now.

>>81876990
Kids and teens don't choose where they live.

>>81876996
>pandemic
Yeah you can say the majority of people are obese retards, it's still their own choice how they spend their time. Take any 2 or 3 people from that "majority" and if they spend time together then suddenly they are not alone anymore. I see it happen all the time when someone chooses to spend time with another person and not alone.

>>81877003
Most of these people do not live near each other.

>>81877001
most of gen Z chooses where they live.

These replies do nothing but prove OP's point about gaslighting.

>>81877010
>the majority of the majority does not live near each other
most people in the world live in New York or California. it takes like 5 minutes to meet someone.

>>81877024
And that's a good thing. Dangerous people like him shouldn't learn how affect society.

>>81877025
The majority of Americans live in suburban or rural shitholes with nowhere to go.

>>81875098
this.
the trick is there is no trick. some just luck out.

>>81877044
>New york city is a rural area
yes but it has the majority of the population so they have everywhere they can go if they wanted. most people don't even have their own horse.

>>81877042
I'm not dangerous. I've never harmed anyone. A person can't be considered dangerous without doing anything.

>>81877055
>without doing anything
That's the point. You don't do anything which for now is a really good thing for the safety of your community. If we can gaslight you into thinking that you have done everything you can and have no choice in the matter, then it's over.

This thread is gay and you people are gay. You want a friend but never even try to talk to anybody. It's just excuses after excuses.
"Well social media and big cities and porn and gen z!! Surely before that, people simply fell into people's laps and they became friends somehow"
Nah bro. Is just you.

>>81877073
61% of the adult population is lonely, you retard.

It has nothing to do with them, making and maintaining friendships has legitimately gotten much harder.

>>81877064
A person who doesn't do anything by definition can't be considered dangerous.

>>81877119
If it was harder then the internet would not exist.

>>81877119
No it hasn't.
people are CHOOSING to be lonely.

>>81877128
There are many criminals in prison who can't do anything right now because they are in prison but they are still a danger to society which is why they are not free.

>>81877119
Name 16 times you have tried to be friends with someone

>>81875083 (OP)
normies don't think about "how to make friends" or "where to meet people"
They just live their life and it happens for them.
Your mental illness makes you into an error, and therefore you have to think about how to make friends and how to meet girls, it doesn't just happen to you like it does for normies.

>>81877119
Can you explain what you think is hard about making or maintaining friendships? Which part is specifically "hard" in your mind?

>>81877134
I quit all internet communities when I was a teenager because I was depressed and they weren't filling the void. The internet absolutely is not a substitute for IRL socializing.

The issue is that I couldn't socialize IRL outside of school because none ofy school friends lived nearby.

>>81877137
61% can't all be making the same choice, retard

Even the US Surgeon General declared it an epidemic

A lot of people ITT are confusing being alone with being lonely. They're two entirely different things

>>81877178
>98% of people can't all be making the choice of eating meat, retard
>95% of people can't all be making the choice to experience sunlight, retard
Partially true. I think having a slave mentality is not normal though.

>>81877170
School districts are based on who is nearby.

>>81877151
Except I don't have a mental illness. I was tested early as a kid and again as an adult. Both were negative.

If there was anything mentally wrong with me, I'd be on disability.

>>81877271
The test for mental illness is whether or not you can vibe with other people. Do you spend time alone?

For all the people that say making friend is easy and it's just us the probleme. What do you consider a friendship? Do you ever hang out with people you just met. Like you give a bottle of water to the guy working in the sun (like the example the guy above gave) do you end up hanging out with him like during the week end or some shit? What's going on here?

>>81877277
No the question is what the fuck do YOU consider friends. We are the normal ones

>>81877276
The majority of people spend the majority of their time alone.

>>81877277
It's just a matter of time and repetition. Men have an easier time just because it's less risky, but yeah you see someone doing the same things as you, the first few weeks or months you're just saying hello, and then you eventually start hanging out. Close friends are yeah generally childhood friends that grew up together and would do practically anything for each other, have at least 1 major event or celebration every month even after having families etc. but in many cases people relocate for work and form new friendships often through common interests, at bars, or at work

>>81877307
They would be less mentally ill if they didn't spend time alone. 30% of people are disabled lol.

>>81877277
>ew talking to strangers? Couldn't be me!
..I wonder were the problem is.
Yes, you talk to people and you develop a bond. It could range from just small awkard talk (if the two of you have no chemistry) to a genuine great time and you want to see eachother everytime the worker comes by. Extrovert people collect friends. While, people like me, (who chooses to be alone) mostly make friendly small talk here and there.

>>81877313
>>81877366
yea, I never feel good around people. I can make conversation or start conversation with stranger easly but Instinctively I try to stay as distant as possible, but I thought I could do an exception for woman but no kidding I haven't seen a woman that isnt fat or old since like 2007. But now that I think about it every time I had sex with a hooker that either wanted to talk to me asked me to do porn with them or stayed at my home a little long after we finished. I would get upset, not talk to them again and remove them from my phone. So yea, you're right I guess I am the probleme. But I guess I just like a very specific kind of people and I haven't met one in woman form. I liked as a friend 2 guy in my life of all the people that I crossed path with. So finding a woman like this is very rare I guess.

>>81877321
Again, they spend time alone because they have no one they can spend it with.

>>81877461
4chan actually helps people!! Good luck, man. This was a wholesome ending!
/thread

genuine question for people who keep saying to "go outside", how do you initiate a conversation that becomes anything more than small talk? I go for a ten mile walk every day, and never exchange more than a handful of words with people I pass. I ride my motorcycle down to the town square and read a book on the grass, and no one approaches me to talk to me. When I sit there on the grass and try to talk to people, they give me short answers out of politeness. Sometimes I go to thrift stores and I try to tell people things that I like about them, such as "That's a cool jacket" and try to introduce myself, but it never pans out. I have no idea how to get past the polite small talk stage.

All my hobbies are solitary activities and I don't know of many places that I can join to try and become part of a group. The only thing I can think of is a local place that hosts D&D sessions, but I've never played before and I don't feel like I would fit in.

>>81877518
If they had no one to spend time with then nobody would be lonely. The only way that loneliness exists is if someone wants to spend time with other people, so it's either extremely rare or a personal choice.

>>81877601
You have to use normie tricks: Face acting. You have to smile more, don't have a grumpy face all the time like talking to people is a chore.
Helping people out is always a great way to make friends. Help them carry shit, offer to go together to the cashier, (since the person in line is only carying one item and the line is too long).. Help push a broken car. Maybe even approach a person and say "ugh! You're reading that? It sucks!" (But you have to be charming to pull this one off) maybe in your walks, try to have some personal fun doing something else, like getting lost in the woods, then when you meet somebody in your walk,you have a genuine interesting story to tell. "Bro, I got lost back there!" Maybe make shit up like "I fed a bird with broken wing once, and he gave me this cool coke-can-stay-tab as a gift that I use as a necklace" LMAOO
I guess my point here is find something you both have in common or both enjoy talking about. He's a history student? Then pull out every history question you ever had. But you have to read people's faces too to see if you're not being a pushover and annoying them.
Now, to have a real, deep, friendship, it's more complicated. You have to be actually, genuinely, interested in the person you're talking to. "Oh you have cool tatoo, cool scar, you played that game too?? cool shirt!" and it develops naturally.

>>81877601
>ten mile walk
find a hiking community. not a "meetup", not a retarded "club", but a community of people that enjoy hiking. start small, then network with more people.

>ride my motorcycle
literally just exist and you have a million options.

>touch grass
go to social events that are outdoor and public. talk to small-time vendors and people who you see regularly. its over

>i have no idea
nobody has any idea. you just do it a thousand times every week and eventually you grow up together with the people around you.

>>81877959
A lot of places do not have these "social events". Only a handful of big cities do.

Thread is full of trolls.
I agree with OP.

>>81877366
Noone becomes friends or sexual partners with strangers.

>>81877874
This person has severe autism and is repeating things from fiction that do not happen in real life.

>>81878308
>>81878353
You had to ruin the wholesome ending to the thread

>>81878353
I don't post often and I was sincerely hoping to get some advice. I wasn't espousing fiction but I am probably autistic sorry

thread contaminated by mossad demoralization shills
fuck off retards

>>81878909
re-moralization squads, mobilize!

We're all going to make it bros

>>81878859
> I wasn't espousing fiction but I am probably autistic sorry
Huh? I don't understand what you're saying. Is that english?
I posted that advice. I've done everything in that advice, except the bird bullshit, so say it clearely to me please.

>>81875083 (OP)
>Why the fuck do I not get any real advice when I ask where to go make friends and meet girls?
You need to spend money to make money, and to spend money you need to have money. Try telling that to a homeless person. The same thing applies to social capital.

>>81875083 (OP)
Redditors will tell you with a straight face to go to MtG tournaments to get pussy and then act like you should kill yourself because you chose to not accept their godsend wisdom

>>81875083 (OP)
It's not a game of luck, it's about taking the advice that works and doing it properly instead of throwing lame tantrums after trying once and failing

>>81875083 (OP)
Just a reminder that autism can make it VERY difficult for some people to talk to others, I feel shy around new people and idk what to say to them, if you aren't autistic leave OP alone

>>81878046
if the place has grass, then the place has events.

>>81875083 (OP)
Because it is all generic advice.
It worked for them, so they expect it to work for you. The normies and the just world fallacy.
Sadly, for social misfits and incesl, nothing actually works. We need women to be attracted to us, and actually put in the work to take us to bed.
Yet foids never work that way. Even if they are interested, they say nothing. I seem to only 'attract' those types, so I am still incel in my late 30s.