I need to bitch and moan into the void about things mostly beyond my control. The void can feel free to commiserate or call me a faggot or to kill myself. Free (You)s here.

I'm so very tired of literally fucking everything. All I do is wageslave full time, and then vegetate on media at home. I've gotten to my mid thirties, but this is all life turned out to be.

All I've got is a few thousand in the bank, and nowhere to go, so I stay in my room in my parents' house on vidya, weebery, and porn like I'm still in high school. My credit score got tanked because I tried to help out a friend. Long story short, he's a piece of shit that never paid me back and never paid his half of rent, so I moved back home eventually. The new score is too low to qualify for anything, let alone a worthwhile apartment in a safe neighborhood. I'm stuck most of the time when not at work in a room that's 40% bed. There's no freedom or privacy, and it's not an environment conducive to buckling down and learning if I wanted to better myself. Most of my shit is in storage. There are no "third places" and I do not have friends. I have never had anyone be more than friends.

(1/2)

(2/2)

There isn't anywhere I can turn to for relief, because absolutely nothing about my story or daily experience is unique or special. There are countless anons out there struggling with far worse and not even complaining about it. At least not publicly. And every online "community" out there even has rules against "trauma dumping." I know for a fact no one wants to hear this shit. When you're a grown ass man, you're on your own. Only you can hope and cope to make anything about your life better.

But I can't. I'm trapped. I could never afford property. I'm too retarded and bad at everything to make my own house. I have no prospects for a "career." Even the #vanlife hobo meme dream is shockingly out of reach. So I just drift through this bullshit every single night, wishing I was almost anywhere else, or at least dead. I literally don't deserve better, but I cannot continue like this indefinitely.

And that guy who never paid me back, who was supposedly my "best friend" is now dying alone of cancer. I feel zero schadenfreude or joy about this. It destroys me daily, in fact, because it's just one more thing I can do nothing to change, and one more person I failed. He wouldn't even want me to visit him. Fuck, man, everything sucks. Thanks for reading my blog.

>>82137479 (OP)
NOOOO MY LIFE SUCKS I HAVE TO WORK AND LIVE RENT FREE WITH MY FAMILY STILL I EAT WATCH PLAY ANYTHING I WANT, besides the credit score your life has no problems stop making problems just to seem so you have them

>>82137510
Being NEET adjacent and khhv is not a life I want to live for much longer. I don't enjoy anything that I do.

>>82137483
At least you got nothing to lose man. Wherever your life goes from this point, it's only going to be up if things are as shit as you say.

Set some attainable short term goals and regain some confidence. Show yourself you can still do it and work your way up to bigger stuff. I believe in you bro.

>>82137479 (OP)
Boohoo you made a few bad decisions and you still have about +/- 50y to fix it.. Keep complaining anon, remain here with the rest of us in your sad little safespace that will probably help you alot!

>>82137589
>At least you got nothing to lose man. Wherever your life goes from this point, it's only going to be up if things are as shit as you say.
You know what... While I think it's still going to get worse still before it gets better, I can't argue with the basic premise. I won't have ties to this area and can move on. I'm going to keep huffing copium that a real life is only a few years away.
>I believe in you, bro.
Thanks, bud.

>>82137651
Shit, n'wah, how do I get a piece of your optimism? I'm not getting any younger, you know. And I never had a "peak"

>>82137677
You got to do more than huffing copium. Right now you come home from work, switch on the pc and aimlessly click around until you're tired right? How about you get a little routine going. Set a time for relaxing, for eating, taking a walk everyday, working out a bit and of course limit that aimless pc time. Set a goal to do 1 hour of productive stuff every day. Have a set day to get groceries, clean up etc. No need to do this shit all at once, it's enough to start with 1 thing at a time.

Over a few weeks you'll start to get some discipline back and that's going to feel great.

I ruined my life as well, you must learn to cope psychologically if you're going to face old age like this I realized, you have to have some delusion keeping you going. This is why Jesus is so powerful from human despair. Lie to yourself, it will get better. Poorfag.

>>82137800
i wish link was real so i could kiss him on the lips and rub his hair

>>82137807
plenty of rule 34, I saw this one of him as a Zora that was really hot and gay.

>>82137807
he wouldn't want a gross incel robot chud to kiss him

>>82137807
Moid here but I feel the same way about Link. No other man in the universe does a single thing for me, but Link... I'd like to turn him into my wife. I can't explain it.

>>82137760

Shit i don't know but this is my garbage agenda
>Microdose weed
>Spend 6 days a week actually fixing your life
>Sunday you don't do shit and rest

And most importantly stop staring at screens if you actually have shit to do.. It's not that hard

You say you're trapped and can't do anything to save yourself yet the only things you do in your free time are jack off and play video games. And you're going to keep doing that, too, since what you want is just to complain rather than to make your life better

>>82137820
i like the animation where hes getting pounded by multiple zoras
>>82137826
even just knowing such beauty exists would be enough to send a tear down my cheek
>>82137830
im also a moid, i like both masculine and feminine guys but link is especially beautiful

but once you start wanting to defile the main character with gayness you are something else.

>>82137479 (OP)
faggots ruined your vent thread OP, i'm sorry

>>82137785
This isn't the first time I've tried to fix things, but I can't argue with any of that. Baby steps. I'm tired of being powerless.

>>82137800
What happened to you, buddy? You can give the short version if you don't want to get too into it. And I would like to be religious again. I'm not atm.

>>82137867
don't lie, you would

pron is very addictive

>>82137483
>and one more person I failed.
OP.
I can't pretend that I'm personally invested in your story, nor can I extend you a great deal of sympathy as I'm stretched pretty thin myself.
But you need to understand something that has helped me to start to come to terms with my own situation.
You did not fail this person. This person failed you. YOU are the one who deserved better. You did not deserve to be treated so disrespectfully, to have your life and reputation damaged by this scumbag. You perceive yourself as less-than and it has you feeling like even trash like this deserves your sympathy but they do not.
YOU deserve your sympathy. You were wronged and it was not righted.
And this probably applies to many, many other things in your life. You've painted yourself as the problem, but are you? No. Not really.
Not when you're being fair to yourself.

>>82137869
Are you going to change something after this thread or is it back to the usual business for you? I really hope you take action. You did it once, you can do it again

Can I not reply to more than one person at a time on this board? I keep being told to reformat

>>82138076
You can, its just annoying like that sometimes

>>82137807
I could definitely be a faggot for Link, but that would be silly in any world where Zelda exists.

>>82137847
Maybe that's true, but it's hard not to give up after years of nothing but failure, setbacks, and isolation. >>82138017 But I would like to think I'm still capable of change.

>>82138078
Damn, that makes free reply threads needlessly inconvenient. What is with this site these days

>>82138123
Why would it be silly?

>>82137880
Maybe, but don't be gay, bro. Bifaggotry is a scam, women are better

>>82138123
God, that princess cake... fuuuck dude...
I would Super Smash, brother...

>>82138157
Idk, there was a hack a few months back, but its probably just degraded over the years, its definitely past its glory days, and I agree it can be super fucking annoying to use, the 120 timer didn't go away for me until after like 6 posts today and phoneposting on this board sometimes breaks and its been like that ever since ive started using this site, which has been almost 5 years now

>>82138166
a cute man is worth like a trillion foids doe imo...

>>82137920
Maybe this is a lame response, but I'm going to have mull this post over and think about it. You might be right about the whole thing. But I don't want to be the type of person that externalizes all my problems either.

>>82137867
It's all good, at least they're not posting dicks everywhere

>>82138221
you like what we're posting don't you? ;)

>>82137479 (OP)
>My credit score got tanked because I tried to help out a friend. Long story short, he's a piece of shit that never paid me back and never paid his half of rent
go more into that. I find those stories interactions far more interesting than say dating woes.

>>82137651
>you still have about +/- 50y to fix it.

No, no you don't, each decade of your life has peak optimal experiences that are best to have in those age groups. You want to know love and sex before you are 30, hell before you are 25 even, you can't simply "fix" getting old, no one at 30 can out right experience life like they did at 20 and it quickly gets worse when you hit 40, 50, etc. The only reason people tell themselves stories like yours is because the idea that you fucking blew it might lead to a darker outcome than this misbelief that things don't change as you get older. They do. By a lot.

>>82138221
He wants people to post dicks!

>>82137843
>Stop staring at screens
I've been listening to audio books anyway, so I can start reading physical books a few hours to make that actually happen

>>82138146
Just do it faggot. No more I would like to think I'm capable. You are a man right? You got to act like it

>>82138248
That shit is irrelevant to the point i was trying to make he is already past 30 so tf you on with cumming in pussy before you are 25..
>try to get a house
>try to pay your pay off your debts
idk, start living more healthy etc..

I'm not saying you are "entirely wrong" but typing and reading that shit was a waste of both our time, thanks for kicking in open doors anon..

>>82138248
Unfortunately, I don't have much of a good paper trail. I wouldn't be able to prove much even if he did have money and wasn't dying. In the beginning, more than five years ago now, I would simply help him with money sometimes. You know: cover a month of rent here, buy him a pizza so he doesn't starve while he sits and plays Destiny 2 instead of getting a job there. Then later, he got into a bad situation where he missed too much rent and fucked over the wrong landlord, even after I covered several months in a row. His car broke down completely at the same time, which he needed to do his contractor job. He was utterly fucked and would have been homeless and lost his cushy, easy job he loved so much because of how little it demanded of him. I covered hundreds of dollars worth of motel costs for a few weeks and then let him live at my parent's place. We the. moved out into a shitty trailer next to meth heads for a while so he had a place. My parents got him his current vehicle so he could keep working. We then moved into another place he couldn't have gotten into without me.I covered the majority of rent and the overwhelming majority of utilities: I could count on one hand the number of times he covered his half of that. I could go on and on, and money stuff isn't even the worst of his lying ass. But even I eventually got tired of being used and never repaid and got the fuck out of there.

>>82138338
That may be, but don't point so threateningly at that deer. It didn't do anything

>>82138421
That deer is wanted for anime girl abuse and had it coming

>>82137479 (OP)
Inbutdeep, you are god. You can summon anything your mind desires. Just use your magical omnipotence.

>>82138396
I did/am doing something similar. I tightened up my spending, doing things like cooking and fixing broken things instead of buying new. Learned how to invest, focused on getting ahead at work and got promoted. I haven't "made it out" but it FEELS like Im making progress and knowing I'll have a stack of cash to give my family when Im gone is giving me some purpose. I also like going to church once a week even just zoning out during the sermons if nothing interests me I get some good thinking done.

>>82138346
It's more aimed at those that are still young that could be reading this. A lot of poor young guys get suckered into this idea that they have all the time in the world. They don't. I understand the cope of it all, you don't want to tell that guy who's 30 that his prospects of owning a home or getting his shit together in general may be a hollow victory as he will be old and empty with little else other than he got to the party very late, so yeah he needs to hear that he should keep trying because there is no alternative and there is a chance he could be that outlier but anyone that's young needs to understand that the clock is ticking and faster than they might think.


>>82138396
I find it fascinating you all would help him so much.