Thread 82388314

Hello. I've posted before about feeling stuck in my small town and feeling like I'll have to marry, grow old, and die never knowing what it's like to be an independent person.

I ended up moving to the city!! It's been fun. I ate chicken at the convenience store. I drank beer at midnight. I sang karaoke. It's all the stuff I ever wanted.

I hesitated to make a post again because I feel like I would disappoint everyone that cheered for me at the start, but despite being surrounded by people in these big buildings, I feel more alone than ever.

Would anyone like to talk for a bit?

>>82388314 (OP)
kill yourself attentionwhore no one cares

this post is racist to black people who cant afford to move out of the ghetto please leave

>>82388314 (OP)
>i feel more alone than ever
The big city can be a giant dump. Homeless people everywhere, it is dirty, smelly, polluted, crowded. Do you like regular fried chicken or spicty chicken?

>>82388356
It sure is. It's quite a dump but there is something about it that intoxicates me so.
I like spicy fried chicken. There's a new lime flavour at a nearby conbini but I don't think they've had it in stock yet.

>>82388314 (OP)
>I'll have to marry, grow old, and die never knowing what it's like to be an independent person.
But you feel more alone than ever as independent?
I want nothing more than to just sleep beside someone and know that we're together against the world, and do all sorts of cuddly shit

>>82388314 (OP)
>Would anyone like to talk for a bit?
Sure.

Cities are strangely isolating. People don't have time for other people unless they want something from you. You get used to walking past other people and only seeing them as background noise or worse - as threats. I lived in a bad part of a city for a while and a lot of times seeing someone coming in my directing has me ready to draw a gun due to past experiences.

>>82388418
Yeah, pretty much. I don't want to go back to my grandma and mother. I don't want to be given a curfew again as an adult, nor do I want people barging in my room at all hours of the day.

I would also like someone to hold and cuddle, but I fear that is way beyond me. I believe people call it blackpill. I don't think I'm attractive enough for romance. I can only do so through the internet.

>>82388427
That sounds scary. Luckily I don't live in a city that has that high of a crime rate. Murder and such I don't hear about very often. Though suicide rate is going up.

I wish there was a sort of Third Place wherein I could talk to people without fear of being a bother to them. I want to talk about anime and such and meet people on there like I do on 4chan.

>>82388429
>I don't think I'm attractive enough for romance
I don't think romance has anything to do with attractiveness necessarily. Or, I refuse to believe so at least. Some people are shallow, but there's someone out there. I know she's somewhere, hiding.
Have you considered traveling? I recently got my passport and have saved up to see Europe.
I'm going to see where both of my great-great grandparents lived and I'm particularly interested in Eastern Europe.

>>82388448
>wish there was a sort of Third Place
Suburbs are nice. I moved to a decent cul-de-sac recently and it stays pretty quiet. Don't know where to meet people though. Best I can do is talk to people at church but I never see them outside of church.

>talk to people without fear of being a bother to them
I think that's one of my biggest problems. I can't initiate conversation to save my life unless I already know someone really well. Like how do I even walk up to someone and talk to them? How the Hell do people do that?

>>82388457
That's awesome. I love Eastern Europe. I have always been interested in Soviet-era culture and media. I think Cheburashka is much cuter than Labubu.
I don't think I can save up for an international trip for a long time. I'm $3k in debt and it'll take me at least a year to get out of it.
>>82388467
Church huh. Maybe I should become more religious. The last time I tried talking to someone, I asked them if they were from America and they shrugged me off. I never tried again after that.

>>82388474
>Maybe I should become more religious
I always encourage it. Of course, I'm pretty biased.

>asked them if they were from America and they shrugged me off
That's rude. What country are you from, if you don't mind my asking?

>>82388314 (OP)
How many guys have you fucked

>>82388481
Maybe someday.
It's somewhere in east asia. Sorry if it's lacking in details. I'm worried I'll get judged.
>>82388495
Genuinely just one person. He did not stick around for long and left my life quickly after.

>>82388505
An anon will call you a whore even though they've had sex before

I always have grand dreams of moving to the city. I live in what is regarded as a mid sized city in the US. Problem is that it feels like a small town, just endless sprawl and small clusters of people here and there. I don't think I'd do well in a big city though

>>82388474
>I think Cheburashka is much cuter than Labubu.
hah, yes, the newer plushes look so pale and corporate though
>I'm $3k in debt and it'll take me at least a year to get out of it.
Well I'd look at it as more time to plan the trip and get everything out of it that you can
>I want to talk about anime and such
Do you watch seasonal? That's crazy that there's really no third place in east asia to find people to just hang out with and discuss that

>>82388525
That sounds par for the course.
>>82388530
Why don't you think you'd do well in a big city?
>>82388531
That's true. I'll plan it out and think about it more.
That's such a cute cheburashka. I love him.
I watch seasonal but currently I'm only watching Fragrant Flowers and Shoshimin Series.

>>82388505
>Left my life quickly after
Sorry about that
And was asking cause I thought you were a hoe I met off here, you don't sound like her thoughbeit

>>82388505
>Sorry if it's lacking in details. I'm worried I'll get judged.
All good. Just wondered if it was somewhere I knew much about. I hear most East Asian countries have extreme highs and lows when it comes to their day to day living. Prosperity at the cost of back breaking work hours and such.

>did not stick around for long and left my life quickly after.
I'm sorry to hear that. I'm in a somewhat similar boat, except that I allowed the relationship I had to drag on far longer than I should have and was left while on deployment.

>>82388314 (OP)
Good for you, I'm happy for you. Now find a husband before you take miles of big city cock.

>>82388429
>I don't think I'm attractive enough for romance.
Do you have a vagina? If so you'll be fine.

>>82388541
I'm too introverted I think, and too scared to do anything lol. I moved to the other side of the country a few years ago, granted it was a rural area, and I didnt make any friends or really learn to do much. I also traveled through the Baltics/eastern europe last year and besides a random dicorder who met up with me in one of the countries, it was the same deal. Most of my nights were spent night walking through the empty cities yearning for some sort of connection... In my thoughts, Id be able to meet more people in the big city, do more things. It'd probably just be more of the same though, but maybe worse since its so expensive, maybe get in trouble

>>82388558
Yeah, that wouldn't be me. I haven't met anyone off of here.
>>82388559
Haha, drinking once a month with friends, then going back to work for most of the month. It's a crazy life to lead, it feels extremely bipolar. Is it not the case in the west?

Oh dear deployment. Are you an army man?
>>82388560
I'll try. Thank you.
>>82388569
It wouldn't be love if it was just sex.
>>82388577
That sounds incredibly lonely. My eyes turned a little watery from the imagery that you used. If people were as kind and thoughtful as you, maybe the world would be more of a gentler place.

>>82388314 (OP)
>despite being surrounded by people in these big buildings, I feel more alone than ever.
that's the part that sucks the most about living in the city, as opposed to somewhere where you're more likely to know your neighbor on average

>>82388591
Men will love anyone they put their dick in repeatedly as long as they're not putting their dick in anyone else. The question isn't whether you're attractive enough, the question is: are you willing to accept a man that isn't attractive enough to do better than you?

>>82388591
>not the case in the west?
Usually we get Saturday and Sunday off of work. I work 4 12 hour shifts per week, so I get Friday, Saturday and Sunday to myself.

>army man?
Used to be a machinegunner, yeah. Thses days I'm a security guard. Trying to get into police though.

What do you do for work? You like your job at all?

>>82388596
Yeah. I wonder what I can do to be a more friendly and approachable person.
>>82388626
I'm a benriya. I take odd jobs through the net like transcribing a video or translating some text. I like it. I get to meet all sorts online.

That's a lot of days off. But those are also long hours. What do you do on your day off?

>>82388645
>take odd jobs through the net
Sounds interesting, if a bit unstable. Glad you like the work. You plan on staying in it or getting a different job some day? Or going to school?

>But those are also long hours
No kidding. It's wild how burned out I feel by the end of the day after doing nothing.

>What do you do on your day off?
Most of the time I have my child, I have 50/50 custody so I take him on my off days. I also carve out time to play some video games with my friends on Discord or we play our pen and paper game we made.

What do you usually do to relax?

>>82388703
It's pretty unstable but somehow I make it through every month, haha.
Oh you have a child, that sounds lovely. I'm sure they must be happy to have such a caring father.
I used to play ICRPG. A very simple TTRPG.

Right now I watch anime. Play some gacha games. I very much like hoyoverse.

>>82388314 (OP)
Congrats on growing. Most of us don't do that here. Sorry. Keep going. I believe in you.

Good luck.

>>82388314 (OP)
How did you even find this place? Regardless you should kys normie scum

>>82388717
>somehow I make it through every month, haha.
What more can one ask for, eh?

>sounds lovely
I regret a lot of things I have done, and I especially regret the relationship I had. But I do love my boy. Honestly the coolest person in my life.

Granted, being a single dad makes the dating scene effectively dead for me but with the trade-off being that I have my goober I can absolutely make do.

>ICRPG
Never heard of it. What's it about?

>watch anime. Play some gacha games
I don't watch much anime. I have a handful that I do like but I have been told by other anons that I have excessively normie taste. What kind of anime do you watch?

I could never get into Gacha. Looking at Genshin always makes me feel slightly ill for reasons I can't explain.

>>82388314 (OP)
ohayo
im glad ur finally doing what youve wanted i was hoping for an update, is ur place cheap to rent? do you have a job?

>>82388779
Thank you. I appreciate it.
>>82388826
Thank you as well! It's cheap yes, I do odd jobs right now as part time work.
>>82388793
That's pretty lovely. Single parents are some of the strongest people. My dad was mostly out of my life. I get to talk to him once every few months.

I like dramatic anime. The kind that make you sad or cry. Gacha is fun! I like it. Although I know it's very strange for foreigners.

It's not as predatory as it sounds.

>>82388845
>Single parents are some of the strongest people
A lot of them kind of suck. I promised myself that I would give my kids a happy family. Went and screwed that up pretty good. I don't think I'll ever live down the guilt of not giving my son a stable family.

>dad was mostly out of my life.
I'm sorry to hear that, but I know how it goes. My dad was semi-present, but he was a terrible father.

>I like dramatic anime. The kind that make you sad or cry.
I got a lot out of the dramatic scenes in Berserk, Edgerunners, and Devilman. Been meaning to look into some Ghibli films, since I hear they're very good. I can't remember the name but I was told to watch the one about the brothers escaping from Hiroshima after the bombing.

>not as predatory as it sounds.
That was always a concern for me. I hate gambling, because I have seen first hand what it can do to people. Also just not big into the art style.

I am glad that you are able to enjoy it though.

>>82388845
>Thank you as well! It's cheap yes, I do odd jobs right now as part time work.
thats good, i wish i could do odd jobs and live in a city but i live in canada :/ do u have a mini akiba like spot in ur city maybe u can find activities and ppl with similar interests there

>>82388314 (OP)
How old are you? Fuck simps

oh, I remember your previous threads. Congrats on making it to the city. Wishing you the best :3

>>82388314 (OP)
I want you to sit on my face anon

>>82388314 (OP)
Briefly seen your threads before. Hope the independence is still good, despite the loneliness. Am hoping to be independent as soon as I can support myself.
>Would anyone like to talk for a bit?
If we can talk about video games and anime, then yes.

It's a matter of adapting, you have lived most of your life at a specific pace and the city just has another. Go get yourself some karaoke friends or learn to cook chicken or something