Thread 82518123

>links
erowid.org
getmonero.org
psychonautwiki.org
psychedelia.io (Canada ONLY)

Mescaline edition

>>82518123 (OP)
>psychedelia.io
I mean I don't care if you advertise your clearnet drug store here, but you'll get the thread banned.

>>82518699
>clearnet
>>82518699
>drug store

>>82518123 (OP)
mescaline sucks so much all it did was make me feel like i was in a sauna wtf is it supposed to feel like?? my friend keeps telling me it's good

Decided to give one of those "DynaVap" thingies a try. In the mail now. Got their cheapest model but still, hope it wasn't a waste of money or just a novelty.

Is there a secret to using dry snus? I use zyn everyday since quitting vaping. I like it more but sometimes it's just not strong enough.

>>82518123 (OP)
anyone take pregabalin everyday?
how much dosage do you take

>>82518123 (OP)
Weed lowers my self-esteem, makes my thoughts more negative, makes me remember every mistake I've ever made, etc. It basically just makes me hyperfocus on everything that's already wrong, in contrast with alcohol which numbs it all. Is weed just not for me? I remember the first few times I ever smoked it it was actually pretty awesome. But I haven't been able to replicate that, and I've only ever smoked weed maybe a dozen times ever. It could be the strain, but it doesn't seem to make a difference nowadays, even if I'm already in a good mood. Ironically, when I first started smoking I always hated that feeling of losing control when it starts to kick in, but now I'm used to it.

>>82520297
It's stupid to take pregabalin every day. You simply get tolerance and addiction.

The most you can do without creating tolerance is twice a week.

>>82520484
lol i took 75mg eod

I forgot how much not being able to sleep sucks.
thank god I have weed and other drugs or I'd start cutting throats (no I wouldn't I'd be crying like a bitch and begging my doctor for a prescription)

>>82520330
>Is weed just not for me?
Could be. It's a common thing for many people to realize that certain drugs (or overarching drug types) just aren't for them.
>the first few times [...] it was actually pretty awesome
This indicates to me that it could be a few things, either:
>Certain ratios/doses of THC and CBN/CBD are not right for you.
>Other non-drug factors influenced your experience.
Either way, consider waiting a little while and when you want to return to it, dose on the lower side or with a more balanced ratio of the two.

>>82519105
ive never tried it but it seems to be a kind of unique drug. look up the doors of perception, its a short essay

>>82520330
>>82521055
yeah i think anon just has to smoke less or go to therapy.

If it were up to me you'd all be given the death sentence for killing your sobriety, a sin worse than murder

https://youtu.be/2YVvMfXXG7E
there's gonna be a whole lot of sippin up

do you ever finish writing something very long, very sincere, and strongly (positively) emotionally charged (or, to you at least), but then come down with the cursor hovering over post and you just sit there feeling embarrassed for it and unforgiveably autistic? i wanted to write it so bad and get my feeling and experience out there and now i'm not sure i want to acknowledge to myself that i could write so much trite self-obsessed stuff and then vomit it up in front of kind strangers and think it was so nice. makes me wonder if my usual self-perception around people is a comparable illusion, because it can certainly seem and feel that way sometimes

>>82521640
It's no different from other psychedelics

>>82522598
Unfortunately I can't kill my sobriety, I can only push it away for a few hours.

>>82523227
If you don't dare do it on an anonymous forum, where will you?

>>82523227
incredibly real. wrote several paragraphs bemoaning how i fuck up everything I touch and I've proven myself incapable of handling the tiniest bit of responsibility over and over and over again. Was about to send it and then just thought to myself what a fucking pathetic waste of air I was. No one gives a damn that I can't do anything right. I'm subjecting people to my misery for a fraction of a morsel of catharsis. And that is somehow even more pathetic than being terminally incompetent.

>>82523542
the woods. actually I think I will head out there unless I just drop within the hour. (this one wasn't really anonymous.)
>>82523558
yeah. the emotional rant > it doesn't matter > self-loathe > close tab combo is my bread and butter.

subutex is the devil, it was the only thing i had all week last week on friday (one 2mg dose) and now i finally got some codeine and it doesnt fucking work, im barely getting a buzz off 560mg

I fucking hate lyrica, it catches me off guard and I start rearranging my entire room.
(jk I love lyrica, it makes me normal)

>>82523227
Yeah, I feel like that whenever I have good things to say about jukebox musicals like the trolls movies.
They are so happy and make me feel so happy, yet I can't write my true feelings about such things because I know I would get made fun of.

I also don't like sharing my incomplete writing projects, but more because I think it isn't worth a reader's time until it's been decently polished for readability. To put out bad work feels like stealing to me. For you have stolen what is most valuable to someone that they can never get back only to bore them, time.
The two things I don't want my writing to be is difficult to read due to technical shortcomings, and boring.

>>82520297
300 mg pretty much every day. Sometimes 600 if i wanna feel funny. If i take a half of a beta blocker and a 300mg gabby it works wonders for my anxiety.
Does anyone have a tolerance chart for pregabalin in the same vein that charts exist for tolerance on lsd, shrooms? I'd be interested to know the refractory period between doses that'll keep my tolerance at zero.

i cant believe i didnt get fired last week, i was visibly fucked up for 4 days straight, i came in 2 hours late two days in a row and i fell asleep on lunch for 3 hours in my car
they havent even drug tested me yet, i got the fake piss on me all the time just in case but holy shit i can not believe i got away with that

>>82518123 (OP)
Those who like adderall do you like MDMA? I like how hyped and energized conventional stims make me feel is it really comparable at all or is it a whole new thing.

I was the dude in the last thread who had just found out about THCA.

Trying to shop for this stuff as a noob is overwhelming.
I don't know what any of the strains are/do or who to order from.
There are too many options and it all basically looks the same to my uneducated eyes.

>>82525533
i don't know a ton about thca but it if you're just looking for legal weed in an illegal state just buy 2018 farm bill loophole stuff. its literally just thc extracted from hemp. there are a trillion brands that sell it jolly is my go to but there's also like kush kube and stuff like that.

Anyone have expierence with RCs like 4 aco/ho met? Is it true the have a calmer head space? Any reccomendations?
Pic for attention

Really regret getting back on the 7oh train and really wish I could erase the knowledge of there being a headshop selling it 5 minutes away from me from my mind.

The withdrawals aren't as bad physically as fentalogues and o-dsmt but it's almost up there mentally. Just crying in the shower for hours, too afraid to go outside, jumping at every sound...

I'm worried that my longterm low contact drug dealer is going to be driven out of business by marijuana legalization where I live. I've been buying from this woman for 5 years and its been easy and great the whole time. She only really does THC and psychs though so legalization could wipe out like half her business or more. I can find weed anywhere but I'm not cool enough anymore to know where to get shrooms in person. And I'll be god damned if I ever give up my magic mushrooms.

>>82518123 (OP)
What can I reasonably expect from a low dose of shrooms?

>>82525533
I regularly get THCA weed and could point you to some vendors if you want. Strain doesn't matter, fuck what people say, strain DOES NOT MATTER. All that matters is the potency % and whether it's indica, sativa, or hybrid. What are you looking for? Strong weed or mellow? Are you trying to get the best bang for your buck or does cost not matter?

>>82526308
How low? If it's a microdose you'll feel mood enhancement and if it's low enough to feel but not trip it's comparable to a long weed high

>>82526298
It's already defacto legal via THCA, she won't lose any business she wasn't already going to lose.

>>82526356
>it's comparable to a long weed high
That doesn't inspire confidence in me. For years weed has given me instant panic attacks.

>>82525417
Adderall is a pure stimulant.
MDMA is a stimulant-empathogen.
They're not in the same category.

They being said, I've never met someone that "didn't like" MDMA.

has anyone tried "magic mushroom" gummies and chocolate bars? how were they? In a few years, i plan on trying some of these legal highs.

>>82526374
Then why did you jump to shrooms nigga?

>>82526438
They are usually just amanita which does basically nothing. If you're lucky maybe there'll be some unreported thc

>>82526374
>>82526456
I'm double replying but look, while I question the judgement that led you to take shrooms you're probably gonna be fine. Try to get outside into some greenery if you can. If not try to surround yourself with things or people you like. Throw on a YouTube visualizer and some music you like

>>82526456
It's not like I sought them out, my girlfriend is getting some handed to her, I'm just trying to figure out what to expect.

>>82526499
Oh. Well see my post above you for my suggestions on what to do if you take them

getting really sick of these ddosing faggots

>>82521640
thanks, ill give it a read

>>82526438
As you can expect, there are no mushrooms in those candies. It's usually a tryptamine analogue but they won't tell you which one and at what dosage.
It's a gamble, and I wouldn't play the game. Get real psilocybin mushrooms.

260mg or 270mg of caffeine just hits the spot for me.

>>82526438
i bought some expecting them to be amanita muscaria and STILL felt nothing. so i wouldn't fuck with anything that doesn't say 4-aco-dmt

>>82526350
Best bang for my buck sounds like a good way to start.

Premium or exotic stuff would be a total waste on someone like me as I wouldn't be able to tell any difference. I kinda wish there was just a relatively low cost "default" to which I can form a base opinion off of.

>>82526438
Personally never tried them but had a friend who tried like 5 different brands and said they all did nothing.
He then went on to just growing proper mushrooms at home.

>>82527008
Anything higher than 150 mg gives me tremors and sweats.
I tried preworkout once. Never again.

>>82527088
Well in that case I recommend emerald-smoke.com's $100 65g jar of shake. It has middling reviews on the site but I'm working through one right now and I've been pleased for the price. It doesn't say on the website, but my jar was around 30% potency. I think right now they're doing BOGO 50% off too

How dangerous is ambien? My doc wants to prescribe it for me due to my chronic insomnia but the shit I've heard of people doing on it terrifies me

>>82527177
Thanks for the recommendation.
Checking it out now.

>>82527178
my uncle was a very successful "family man" and one night he drank 2 bottles of wine and took ambien (no idea which came first).
he tried to strangle his wife, which led to divorce, jail, lost custody, lost his job and has been in and out of prison.
i'd take my chances with it if i had insomnia. just clear out any alcohol from the house first

>>82518123 (OP)
Why does meth make me feel so normal?
Normal for me (for the first 25 yrs of my life): being tired, depressed, anxious and too shy to socialize, slow, lazy.
When I'm on meth: energized but not overly so, motivated to clean my house and do all the chores I need to do, talking to others seems easy, proactive.
I love the effects so far but I'm scared that in the long term it'll damage my brain's ability to function without meth. I mean, I barely functioned before I ever even tried it, but I don't necessarily want to become worse than before.
Also, I've never tried Adderall, but do you think that would be a "healthier" replacement for meth? Or something else?

>>82527783
It's a fake normal.

If you watch actual normal people they may want to be energetic busy bees of productivity and socially outgoing, but in reality they aren't. Almost no one is "on" and "locked in" all the time the way amphetamines make you feel.
Your normal is the more general normal of most people. They just tend to have better copes for it.

That said you could also have ADD, in which case getting tested would be a good idea. You can learn some copes as well as get a prescription for proper pharma stuff, at least in theory. They have been stingy with adderall lately due to the DEA being dickbutts.

>>82527845
>Your normal is the more general normal of most people.
That feels untrue as I don't think most people are chronically depressed and struggle with basic tasks such as showering and getting out of bed, at least not to the extent that I do.
I do have ADD, I'm not American though so hopefully I can find some meds here without too much trouble...

Took 6mg of clonazepam and I feel fine, like I do feel more relaxed I suppose, but nothing that would make me nod or pass out. I know the onset takes about to an hour, I might redose if not careful while waiting for the onset

>>82527783
You're not normal, you feel normal, as you explained.
Also yes, amphetamine is a healthier alternative to methamphetamine.

There are protocols with which you take amphetamines from Monday to Friday every week without harming yourself. (Only applies if you're 25+)

>>82527845
>>82527958
ADD/ADHD isn't real, a lot of people nowadays simply have developed a natural tolerance to dopamine due to an overstimulating lifestyle (mostly due to constant screen use) and don't feel stimulated without dopaminergic drugs anymore.
Easily fixed by turning off the screens.

>>82528525
ADHD is objectively empirically verifiably real and has nothing to do with lifestyle as it's a developmental condition with a extremely strong genetic component.

Not sure if you are just NPC memeing over a trigger word or you are just willfully ignorant.

>>82528813
No it's not.
I know you wish for it to be because it excuses your poor life choices, but it's not.

Turn off the screens, you'll be fine.

>>82528901
You declaring something doesn't make it true.
All of the scientific evidence is on the side of it being a real condition, not caused by life choices, and not cured by turning off screens.

You are ether a troll or retarded.

>>82528915
You declaring something doesn't make it true.
All of the scientific evidence is on the side of it being a developed condition, caused by life choices, and cured by turning off screens.

You just desperately want a reason to explain your stupid life choices.

>>82528960
The newfag doesn't even know how to quote text properly
LOL

>>82528988
You have such attention issues because of your TikTok social media brain that you did not read the words and realize that the text changed.
Turn off the screens.

>>82528992
You really are retarded.

Also
>attention issues because of your TikTok social media brain
Since you want to make things personal
I was diagnosed with ADHD in the mid 90s.
I have never used tittok or social media of any kind.

When were you diagnosed with mental retardation and learning disability?

>>82528100
klonopin never lets me get that "barred out" feeling that i love; which is probably for the best. 6mg sounds comfy as fuck though

>>82529013
Ah yes, mid 90's, a time long ago without tv, video games, music, etc.

>I have never used social media of any kind
Said the man replying on a social media. Retard.

Turn off the screens for a few weeks just to prove me wrong. It might save you.

>>82529029
How about you educate yourself on the subject.
https://chadd.org/about-adhd/the-science-of-adhd/

>>82529072
You linking the first thing you saw on Google does not erase all the humiliating posts above, you know.

You have difficulty focusing on boring stuff because your brain is used to very strong stimulation. Turn off the screens and soon you'll find the idea of reading a book to be exciting.
Your actions are the cause of what you are.

>>82529143
I did not post the first thing from google.
I posted the legitimate source with the funniest URL.

Posting shit from random people who aren't me has nothing to do with anything.

Instead of making a ass of yourself assuring things that are incorrect you could instead at least try to read.
I know it's probably above your grade level of reading, being mentally handicap and all, but if you try really hard I think you can get it. You can look up any words you don't know by copy pasting them into duckduckgo, that should help you out. I believe in you little buddy.

>>82529194
Your whole post is being condescending and passive aggressive, very feminine behavior.
Maybe on top of being a screen addict you're also a little bitch.

If you don't want people to call you on your obvious substance abuse, don't come to a drug thread.

Turn off the screens.

>>82529226
Yeah anon, I wonder what their issue is. I'm glad I'm not an easily triggered little bitch like them. Aren't you?

You ADHD people are the worst. Always trying to justify why you need to take amphetamines every day. "erm actually my brai-" I DON'T CARE. just take your Adderall and shut up!!

>>82529226
>Your whole post is being condescending and passive aggressive
>MFW

>>82529269
They're the stimulanr version of boomers that are addicted to opiates for "back pain" or something.
>noooo you don't understand I need them

>>82529277
I hope you never know the hell that is a chronic pain condition.
More people kill themselves over that than depression or being trans.

>>82529286
I have chronic pain, not killing myself nor taking opiates that don't work long term.
Live with the pain like a man and kill yourself when your children are adults.

>>82529286
opioids were wayyy over prescribed back in the day and people took advantage of that. i don't think he's shitting on ppl with real chronic pain

>>82529314
>opioids were wayyy over prescribed back in the day and people took advantage of that
That is the narrative the mainstream media and DEA pushed. It isn't born out by actually real world data though.

>>82529304
You've got me laughing at the idea that you'd ever bear progeny, but you can for sure enjoy your virgin manly pain.

>>82529352
>"actually opioids weren't over prescribed"
yeah sure dude. where's your "real world data" then you fuckin loser?

>>82529381

https://www.acsh.org/news/2023/01/09/doctors-prescribing-their-patients-did-not-create-us-opioid-crisis-16787

>>82529364
Meh, this isn't the woman hate thread, this is the only drug thread on the website.
Many of us in this thread talk about our job, wife, family life, etc. This isn't an incel thread.

I happen to have a wife and a child and I'm not allowed to die until he and his possible future siblings are adults and independent. It's pretty standard for a man that was miserable his whole life to wait until the kids are out of the house to blow his top off.
Well, no matter how much psychological or physical chronic pain you're in, you clench your teeth and do the days one by one, until you're allowed to check-out.

>>82529476
>My totally real wife and kid
You shouldn't lie, even on the Internet, it damages your psyche

>>82529485
Not sure what to tell you my man, like many of us in this thread I'm not an /r9k/ user, only a /drugfeel/ user. It's the only place we can talk about drugs here. Not everyone is a bitter incel.

Like many other miserable loser men out there I have a wife and a child, it's nothing surprising.

>>82529514
Bro even if that's not your nephew's foot as ocams razor would dictate you are a pathetic nigga for trying to prove you have a child on /drugfeel/ on /r9k/ take a cold hard look at your self and the adult child that you are.

>>82529535
Just having a discussion my man, not sure why you're so pissy.
Are you at least under the influence, or are you that bitter even when sober?

>>82529548
>I totally have a kid and wife
>I doubt that
>Posts a timestamped picture of a child's foot
>Met with appropriate ridicule for this action
>Well you're being rude!
You sure showed them anon

>>82529618
You can see my son's feet and my wedding ring, nothing special, I still don't understand why you took such an offence.
Maybe it's because of the drug but I would like to know everyone's live here, what kind of life you have, what things are important to you, etc. I think that's interesting.

Me I'm just a sad man trying to do what's right for his family, that's my story.

>>82519105
you just ate some random cactus from a retards backyard not mescaline. only the synth stuff is any good or has an effect at all

Is there a secret way to stay awake when taking zyprexa and klonopin? I've been in a coma for 10 years.

>>82529945
when i was on seroquel and klonopin my psychiatrist prescribed dextroamphetamine 15mg because i slept 12+ hours a day.
that was a little crazy so i switched to modafinil because its more gentle.

I wish she would modafinil these nuts if you see what I mean.

And now have officially spent around $100 bucks on legal weed (THCA) and related paraphernalia despite not even knowing if I will like weed at all in the first place.

Whatever, I am secure enough in my finances that if I turn out not to like it I can just gift it to a friend I know and it won't even feel like a waste.

>>82529286
have you worked in a warehouse? can tell from watching the staff for just a minute that a lot of them probably do suffer from workrelated pains, but they'll tell you themselves that that's not really why they all need to prep themselves for their shifts

>>82527278
Hey man if you're still looking around I just got an email saying these guys have some $50 and under ounces of whole buds. It's all mid range potency from the looks of it, 20-30%
https://litfarms.com/

France and Britain need drug REVOLUTIONS and REVOLUTION to end classism.

Classism is unnatural.
Even some of the most humble cheap socialism ends all poverty.
The world has so much wasted land.

Classism is when an invasive entity that is not apart of the collective tries to subvert and parasite off a collective like a tumour.

Classism does not exist in any true collective.

I spent so much money for a ticket to a Deftones concert tonight but my anxiety is acting up fierce and my 7oh usage is only exacerbating it. Fuck I don't know why I dug myself into this hole again with this shitty headshop drug, I was 3 days clean and the withdrawal symptoms were almost gone but I went and bought another bottle anyways. 400mg in 3 days, I'm a fucking idiot

>>82531348
>>82527278
Forgot to mention that I've bought from them before, the quality isn't top shelf but for the price it's definitely decent enough

>>82531402
god i originally wish that were me

>>82531402
Socialism is even harder on drugs than capitalism THOUGH. Even if modern capitalism takes a more visible anti-drug approach, in actuality capitalism is the only thing keeping the black market and global drug trade alive. If we had real socialism globally, the only thing we'd be getting high off is underage drugs like lyrica, tramadol and benzos

Drugs to enhance my maladaptive daydreaming powers? Reality sucks.

>>82532385
Weed, microdose shrooms, caffeine, those should help with creativity and keeping the boredom off

>>82533255
thanks man ill take a look

>>82530065
Holy shit that sounds insane, your psych is a quack

>>82533405
I said that mix assuming you want to be able to stay functional enough to do things. If you just want to get lost and trip then 1st plateua DXM, an eighth of shrooms, or a hit of acid would be your friend.

Don't mix caffeine with psychedelics but you can mix it with weed if you want to be functional and also have enhanced creativity

pregabalin... oh how I've missed you pregabalin ...

>>82533517
How would you compare it to gabapentin?

I've been trying to get my psych to switch me from gabapentin to pregabalin but he's telling me to wait for some reason. He thinks I'm too loaded on drugs I guess but I need 4mg of klonopin just to go outside, there's nothing I cam do about it, exposure doesn't help.
/blog

>>82533541
I've never done gabapentin, sorry anon

>>82533574
Well, everyone here sings the praises for pregabalin so it must be good. Gabapentin just makes me sloppy and gives me a feeling of unreality

>>82533541
gabapentin is a lot slower acting and definitely not as good as pregab. jfc 4mg clonazepam? how do you even get that, my gp is keeping me on 1

>>82533462
It depends, I like to let my mind wonder when doing chores but yea I will sometimes just go to bed early and MDD for a couple hours or planeshift as the kids are calling it. I'm thinking of adding drugs to the latter one and just tripping in bed for a stronger experience. Doesn't acid kind of make you lose control? (sry I'm a noob)

>>82533614
Yeah I hate how you have to dose gabapentin. A faster acting drug would be much better. And yeah my anxiety is that bad and it's getting worse. I don't even feel relief from the 4mg klonopin anymore. Honestly I'm scared for my future


>>82533632
Acid doesn't make you lose control in small enough doses but you will feel cooped up and wanna go outside. For bed tripping I recommend DXM or shrooms

50gs of 98% THCA distillate for $130 oh boy here we go
https://goldenhourhemp.com/cannacrunchers-thca-distillate/

>>82533664
you guys are dropping knowledge. I'm going to check out DXM on psychonautwiki. All I know about it is from that South Park episode lmao.

>>82533725
Ok so with DXM you're gonna wanna get a pure product, don't use cough syrups with other stuff in them, it can be fatal. You're gonna wanna stick to a 1st platuea 300mg or under trip for your first time. Robocough offers a pure DXM product, last I checked they had shots and pills. Yes the branding is literally designed for you to trip, they know exactly what they're selling and how you're gonna use it lol

>>82533740
>they know exactly what they're selling and how you're gonna use it lol
that's pretty funny, I'm a bongoloid so will prob have to do some googling. Also what's 1st plateau?

>>82533725
DXM is not a very fun disso, i'd recommend ketamine
>>82533664
Try boofing gabapentin, have only done it oral but I've heard good things about rectal

>>82533862
1st plateau is around a 3000mg dose. It's considered a solid trip for beginners, enough to get the magic going but not too much to overwhelm you. Idk if robocough ships to UK tho so yeah if they don't try to find a pure DXM product

>>82533937
I'm not putting these pills up my ass man they would take forever to dissolve. You're trolling right?

>>82533994
*300mg jesus

>>82533994
Break the capsule open, dissolve the powder in water, insert with a syringe after taking a shit
Or not, I haven't noticed a serious difference, maybe 80% as potent vs a post shit

>>82533937
Was literally offered ket at a party once but I turned it down cause I was so cunted lol, kind of regret it desu. I will check out dissos on the wiki.
>>82533994
Good. I'll check out their website. I kind of want to experiement with different dissos to see what is best for me for my daydreaming adventures, DXM looks a good place to start, hopefully they ship. And don't worry I figured it was a typo.

you guys have been helpful, thanks for feeding a noob like me.

>>82534127
I don't even have capsules, I have solid tablets. Thanks but no thanks man

>>82534138
Hope you have a good experience! The problem with DXM is that tolerance builds fast. Appreciate your first trips cause those will be the best you get out of it

Ha I just looked at the robocough website and they totally toned down the branding. They were really pushing the line with it though lol

>>82534204
Even if you have solid tablets, they're still soluble. Either crush them up or let them dissolve over a long period such as overnight.

>>82534245
I'm good, thanks anon

>tfw wanna do something tonight but most of my orders havent come through yet
ive got some really shitty blunts that ill probably end up smoking

>>82534283
Whatcha ordering anon? Aren't all the dark web sites down?

>>82534305
[REDACTED]hub is still up, also ordering some clearnet stuff because im a leaf lole

>>82534321
You can order drugs from pornhub?

Did some molly at an event last weekend and had more fun in that night than I had in my entire adult life.
So glad I didn't spend another weekend alone in my room distracting myself with vidya and weed.

>>82534434
Most robots and posters on this board don't even do drugs. Like just go do drugs lmao fucking sitting around moping or crying or something.something.

When you are on drugs, it's really fun.

>>82534434
>did molly last weekend sitting in my room and sweating my balls off
:(

i feel so fucking shitty oh my god i think this is the lowest drugs have ever taken me
and were going even deeper

>>82534459
That's where I'm at now. I don't want to waste even more years sat around doing fuck all so if drugs give me the boost I need to enjoy myself then so be it.

>>82534539
The sweating is a bit annoying even in the cold and light rain, indoors must feel like being in a sauna

Pregabalin when you have a fever, is it a good idea?
Only one way to find out!

>>82535478
MDMA with the AC on is a perfect experience though. Not sure why you choose to sweat like that when hyperthermia is the only real danger with MDMA.

Man I wish MDMA wasn't instant fucking prison in the country I live in now. It'll have to wait until I go to Europe or something.

>>82533667
>https://goldenhourhemp.com/cannacrunchers-thca-distillate/
im in a legal state and we can't even buy 10 grams at a time. quality definitely sucks, but would be good for edibles

>Took acid bought off the streets about 4 times
>Everything's fine
>Accidentally swallow the fifth tab
>No effect or whatsoever
>Start getting paranoid on the following days
>E-friends stop talking to me
>Can't explain what's happening, feels like I gained consciousness about how the world is a work of art where everything is an act to have a laugh at my expenses
>Diagnosed as schizophrenic

Now when I skip meds I feel somewhat better but if I do it long enough I start feeling awful. It's over for me.
/Blogpost

>>82537115
You're not supposed to buy shit off the street, that's how you get poisoned.
Also you're supposed to swallow LSD.

Congrats on getting repetitely nbomed and ruining your brain.

>>82537135
>>82537135
Buying from silk road using Bitcoin as a broke uni student from a third world country used to be pretty easy, right?

How do people wait for their drugs? I have prescriptions and it feels like that is the only thing I do is wait for the time to take them.

I miss the tramadol binge I had a couple months back
https://youtu.be/BN_66dEBJxc

>>82537653
It's easy when you have other things going on in your life.
Hard if you have nothing to do but think about it and wait.

>>82537670
>produced by Eric Dingus

>>82537653
How do people wait for their drugs?
Learn chemistry and make your own drugs at your own house.

>>82537653
when i have to wait i do some other drugs. waiting for benzos so i'll drink. waiting for stims so ill do some benzos to time skip etc.

>>82537827
>Learn chemistry and make your own drugs at your own house.
Go back to /g/ you fucking autistic mega wizard

>>82537827
Brb, making my own LSD-25 with flour and baking powder.

50mg IV amphetamine this morning, 25mg at around 6PM. studying and cleaning all night. Big job fair tomorrow, and then a test worth 17% of my final- Christ I hate math. the girl i've been thinking about forever comes in tomorrow after my classes. nerve-wracking, a little bit, but a good sort of anticipatory nervousness.
How do i make a lip ulcer heal in 18 hours?

>gram of weed, might go for another gram
>600mg pregab
>4mg xanax
oooohh baby this is going to be nice

>>82538133
hot water and salt rinse. sometimes i use a hydrogen peroxide soaked q-tip on it

I was prescribed 20mg Vyvanse and I feel almost nothing, a bit of a higher heart rate but that's it. When I took Adderall it felt very stimmy, so is this just how Vyvanse is supposed to be like?

Took what was supposed to be 400mg of codeine like 10 hours ago and now I've got chills and I'm puking and shit idk what this shit is but it's got me sick as a dog

>>82525417
I like both and while they have some level of similarity like that other anon said, the overall experience and intended use-case for each is pretty different, but since it's also an amphetamine, albeit a different one, I think that if you like adderall, there's a pretty good chance you'll like MDMA too.

>>82538677
Okay my shit was def laced with dhp or some shit cause I've been sick and tripping for 16 hours now this is fucking awful

I fucking need it so bad

>>82540654
I want it so bad I want to cry

This would make me so extremely happy holy shit

wtf indian tramadol is cheaper than water

>>82540688
I know right. It's a bit more expensive for me because I use a legal route so there's more fees but it's still less than 50 cents per 100mg.

>>82518123 (OP)
I am curious, are there any stereotypes based on the type of drug class someone prefers that you guys have noticed?
e.g., what certain type of person prefers uppers, what certain type prefers downers, etc.

>>82541221
>what certain type of person prefers uppers
Female real estate agents
>what certain type prefers downers
Pedophiles

>>82541018
retarded tramadol
kek

>>82540688
>indian tramadol
Its cheap because there's shit and piss contaminated in it

Any German anons here who can update me on the process of Archetyp? Maybe some links to German articles I can read. It's completely dead internationally and no one talks about it.

>>82542053
that shit got shut down by a multinational coalition, where the fuck have you been?

Turns out letting a physical addiction develop for months was a bad idea, I feel like I'm in some sort of premium limbo.

>teeth still hurt from clenching my teeth so hard during a molly trip
god damn this sucks

>>82542449
I know? I'm asking about the legal process and how its going. He was a German citizen and the site was in the beginning for mostly Germans and they were the major police force going after so it would only make sense for Germans to report on it.

>>82542474
Try years, it's gonna take me the rest of my life to dig my way out of this shit

>>82542474
what drug? only been properly physically addicted to alcohol and benzos which were fucking horrible
also had a stint where i abused pregabalin heavily for months (as in 900mg+ every other day at least) but the withdrawals were so mimimal that i wouldn't even consider it a proper addiction and only makes me want to use it more because it provided so much more benefits than negatives for me

>>82542496
oxycodone but it's opiates in general.

>>82542514
oh fuck yeah my condolences, never touched them beyond trying some a few times because i knew that if i kept using them i absolutely would get addicted and ruin my life
best drugs i ever did honestly

>>82542522
oxys are one of those opiates that don't become shitty overtime like trams, they are always comfy.

Struggling to decide which drugs I should do right now bros. Help me out

>>82542558
i metabolize tramadol very well and it was pretty great even considering i tried oxy but can't say anything about long term
oxy tho.... it is how i think it feels in heaven if heaven exists
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzDLUXN6hAM
this song is about opioids and especially the line
>rest of my life spent in combat
hits hard because i know if(when) i get addicted to opioids that would be it for me, no way out, i'm too weak
if that song sounds any good i highly recommend checking out elliott smith, especially his later stuff because many songs are about opioids or addiction in general
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbBqby-vK50 (my favorite, applicable to any drug addiction really)
when i was first withdrawing from alcohol after a month of drinking ridiculous amounts of vodka every day and my organs were hurting and i was actually scared i would die i remember i just listened to this on a loop while i shook and sweated on my couch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HM5Oo2rY59k
>>82542686
what do you have?

Got that meth, benzos, opce, 2fdck, 4homet

Hey stoners, how do you use weed? I use vapes but I've been curious about shit like shatter or live resin. Also does that stuff smell? I like that vapes are inconspicuous.

>>82543246
edibles all the way
most efficient way to use weed and i prefer the high to smoking it

>>82543275
I'm a leaf that buys legal, edibles here have obnoxious regulations here

>>82543313
just buy normal weed and make your own edibles?
it is extremely easy, you just have to decarb your weed (wrap it in aluminum foil and put it in the oven) and apply it to something with decent fat content (the psychoactive chemicals in cannabis are lipophilic)
simplest way is to decarb the weed at 145 celcius for 7 minutes, apply it to cookies you have coated with peanut butter and then put them back in the oven for 20 minutes at the same temperature and you have edibles, not only functional but basically the max effectiveness you can get out of your weed to the point where someone without tolerance shouldn't take edibles that are stronger than 0.1g of weed because they might overdo it
the worst i've seen is when i gave a short thin friend 0.15g edibles and he got too high to the point he puked...basically very damn effective
of course you can make all kinds of edibles or even tea or alcohol (psychonautwiki dot org/wiki/Green_dragon_tek) but basic firecrackers are the simplest and fastest

>>82529514
Ignore meanposters, they are not worth discussing anything with. I hope you get painkillers/opiates for a moment's relief anon.

I'm trying lithium tomorrow, if it doesn't work I'll kms. Ask me anything

>>82541369
based downer enjoyer
.t downer enjoyer

Daily smokers who are in school, have you noticed memory impairment even if you wait until after studying to smoke? I smoke 2-4 bowls a day recently.
>>82536042
A benzo puts me to sleep when I'm sick and congested

>>82542477
You forgot to took magnesium and probably took too much to begin with.

Hey anyone tried esketamine

>>82543679
Not only is cannabis bad for memory in the short term, you're obviously a kid and should know that cannabis impedes brain development on immature brains, and the brain matures until 25 years old.

>>82544429
That's why I waited until after I was 25 and was sure to be a failure in life regardless.

>>82518123 (OP)
Is taking DPH just as bad as it's made out to be IF you're not taking the dosages that cause hallucinations?
I'll take around 100mg to 300mg multiple times a week just for the relaxation and calm it gives me, no desire to try to get the hallucinations, but I'm wondering if this is going to cause long term damage as well.

>>82544614
>multiple times a week
This is the only real concern. First gen anti-histamines can contribute to the development of demetia if used heavily.

Where to buy 7-hydroxymitragynine products or or pure powder inside eu? At least give me search prompts, all shops I find are in the usa or some shit

>>82543275
Personally not a fan because I can't manage the dose by feel on the fly and instead have to be very strict with measuring shit before hand.

Meanwhile with vapor or smoke I can take a hit, wait a minute or too, see if I reached the level I want to be at, then ether put it down or take another hit.
Plus I can make tinchers with decarbed stuff left over from vaporizing as a personal homebrew wellness potion, lol.

>>82543803
Isn't it just ketamine, only you can take it orally?

Personally haven't tried it but read the white paper on it.

Meth and MDMA/Ecstasy mixed together in powder form?

Ah, drug user.
That motherfucker.
What a tool.

Weed is kinda fine I mean. It was way funnier when I was in highschool, nowadays that combination of slightly relaxant effects and slightly psychedelic effects just doesn't seem worth it at all, why not just take actual downers or actual psychs, I mean it's somewhat fun and it can be somewhat harmless in comparison to other shit but like, eh

Also I get really paranoid on it these days plus I feel a need of writing dumb bumps in 4chan threads

i just took meth and creampied the neighbor girl I'd been flirting with. Hope you're all having as good a weekend as i am so far.

>>82540688

Please explain where/how or give legitimate vendor

>>82543767
oh no i had half a gram over a period of approximately 6 hours so it was definitely waaay too much

How do I find a meth connect when I don't know anyone

>>82547407
go on dnm

>took too much xanax and now the rebound anxiety is making me suicidal
i fucking hate how short of a half life it has but its the only cheap benzo and is useful for panic attacks, and jfc was last night bad

>>82526438
Pic related works well for me, granted I've never had the real thing, but these are pretty good, just DO NOT get the peach flavored ones, stick to watermelon, I had my first bad trip with the peach ones and it was awful. 2 packs of these will have to feel good for a good 5 hours or so, they make music 1000 times better in my experience, I wouldn't recommend doing 2 whole boxes out of the gate, work your way up first.

>>82547743
Ah yes chinese research chemicals and lions mane. The gentleman's choice.

>>82546567
If you're both White, keep the child.

>>82546964
Nta but imported indian pharma is a common product on darknet markets.
That's the cheapest way to get tramadol or pregabalin, etc.

>>82547407
Just order it on a market, buying meth on the street is asking for trouble, it's very often cut, mixed, or poisoned.

>>82547743
Lmao, what the fuck is even in this?
What kind of newly discovered tryptamine with unknown effects could be in there? Who knows! Not even the manufacturer knows!
It's the final frontier!

>>82547901
we are both white, but no child. she has a birth control implant.

>>82547743
>that amazon logo
20 bucks per "trip" is taxing but if this is your only option then fuck it.
now can we please put RC benzos in Walmart

>>82547743
Just to note for anyone looking at these posts these are NOT psychedelic and contain muscimol, they are more related to deliriants than psychedelics and are not a very fun time

>>82529469
Very interesting. When googling all data is
>We all know it was doctors so it was doctors
Maybe it was a myth and panic all along. Gotta research more

>>82548479
>~1 script per person in the US at peak
>60% increase in 10 years
>"Huh, maybe there was no over prescribing, and people just actually needed that many oxys and there were no drug seakers!"
Be so fr

Why do so many people prefer almost every other benzo over valium?
I always hear people talking about kpins and xanax, but imo diazepam feels the best. Kpins especially seem overrated to me, it felt like they were doing jackshit last time I tried them.

>>82549335
Depends on what you want out of the benzo. 'Recreationally' valium is the best, but benzos are shit tier recreational drugs anyway. For treating anxiety/insomnia, kpins and xanax are superior

>>82549335
kpins and xans are like opposite ends of the spectrum.
long lasting but mellow vs short but STRONG
I've always heard people about valium like its boring as well

>>82549358
>>82549467
>For treating anxiety/insomnia, kpins and xanax are superior
Kpins did literally nothing for me when I took them, genuinely just acted like a placebo pill, and Xanax just makes me tired or black out, and by the time I'm up it's already worn off so literally pointless to take.
>I've always heard people about valium like its boring as well
Valium definitely isn't boring to me, it's the best of both worlds. A little euphoria, great for my anxiety, lasts a good amount of time, and makes my muscles relax. Just an all around comfy time.
Haven't tried any other benzos though, so can't speak on them.

>>82549812
Exactly, because you don't have anxiety, so the pills do nothing to you. Benzos tend to do that. The only feeling they produce that can be even slightly attributed to euphoria is 'relief'

>>82549812
>A little euphoria, great for my anxiety etc..
that's funny because that's what klonopin does for me. now i wanna try valium and see what it does medically speaking

what the hell did I do with all my spare time when I wasn't doing drugs?

>>82550637
Probably consuming content on a screen like a good consoomer.

>snort a few lines of coke
>jack off and cum in 3 minutes
>fuck it, maybe i didnt take enough
>snort the whole bag
>feel like my heart is beating out of my chest
>still cum in 3 minutes, somehow feels even shittier than a sober cum
>completely back to normal in 15 minutes
>i blew 100$ in 2 hours

Why the fuck is cocaine so shit, how is this drug even remotely popular? For the same price I could tweak my ass off on meth for a month straight and cum interplanetary ropes
every hour

>>82550678
Most likely this
I was recommended to find a hobby but I don't find anything enjoyable, so I'm stuck in limbo, with no opiates to make me content with it.

I've got 40 pressed zenes(how could i even snort them all with s tolerance without booze and benzos, i have 50 bromazolam and 2g of heroin

Can i do myself in with this painlessly? I'm a coward, I only have my family and I love them but they put me here and their grief wont a thing, just my older sister (just 1 of 2) both older brothers and one younger brother and my nieces. I know I'm blessed by that but I've wanted to die / not exist forever.

If you see this Mark or Jon I'm sorry guys love you

>>82551283
yeah that's definitely enough to end it. which is why you should not do it.
Go talk to your family please anon; say hi to one of your brothers or something

>>82551325

My mam in her own words was never maternal and my 1 older sister(goof terms) and young brother knew it.

My dad is an alchy rage acholic who thinks pretending everything is ok the next day despite going to my mams with a baseball bat trying to break in youngest story I remember.

I moved out for 4 years and if I didn't reply to his text in legit 1 hour it was "poor me no one cares" then on the drink and getting mean.

Most and honestly my best friends (like 5) left me after an unrelated hospital stay because my dad freaked and said I'd killed myself, I was sober. I just have seizures.

Where are you from bro?

>>82551325

oh sorry i love my bros we are tight but one has a family he needs to put first, younger has a great career I dont want to mess up and 3rd is a crackhead who i love but will take say i no

>>82551401
that sounds hectic man. i can relate to the alcoholic dad thing. "if i just act like it didn't happen then nothing happened!" shit is weird tto grow up around.
sometimes the best thing to do is distance yourself, but it sucks when you just need a hug and nobodys there.
im from west coast usa

>>82537827
>Learn chemistry and make your own drugs at your own house
Heard of a guy from here who was making his own speed and was surprised of how pure and potent it was compared to what he was used to; buying from dealers. Would definitly make my own amp if I knew how to, and had the space for the lab equipment (live in a very small apartment with bearly place for a PC table). Making your own drugs is very based, and will be better than anything you'd find on the streets (if you really know what you're doing and not poison yourself by mistake). Supposedly making amp and LSD is reletively easy afaik, there are guides about it everywhere on the darknet (and maybe some textfiles from textfile archives on the clearnet). All you need is bootleg basic chemistry knowledge from online or, more efficiantly, a degree (which is harder to achieve but is more holistic when it comes to practical knowledge); base ingrediants (which are sold at bulk on the clearnet at chemistry enthusiast/hobbiest stores, and afaik are legal for scientific/educational use, so no problems at customs) and basic proper lab equipment; which should be cheap to buy, too.
Real 100% pure amphetamine is a far dream for those who can't make it on their own :(.
Unless you get real lucky on a DNM and fall on a unicorn vendor who sells straight from the lab; more common to find LSD straight from a lab/lab quality on DNMs ime since, again, relatively easy to make.
Geez, I wish I had the chemistry know-how to make anything...

>>82537958
>ill do some benzos to time skip
Doing enough benzos to time-skip is a one way ticket to benzo-withdrawals town ime. Be very careful with that, anon; but I'm not your mother.

>>82538133
>50mg IV amphetamine
Where do you get amphetamine trusted enough to IV? Do you just IV washed/cleaned street shit and hope to not be poisoned or what?

>>82551493
None of my irl friends ever had that didnt come from broken abusive homes stepdad kicked the fuck out of me for walking upstairs when he wasn't done (berating a child as an adult, stinking cig breathe and lager) Thats when I moved in with my dad which was better for a long time,

My parents argue through me too cus im a pushover, its like im not there "you never loved him you left me for the man you cheated" etc. etc.

I'm sorry im making it all about me bro, open up anything you want. I'm from UK, I wanted to know if you wanted to play some games or something.

>>82538276
>gram of weed, might go for another gram
>600mg pregab
>4mg xanax
Sound like a party! Maybe a bit of an overkill, might just black-out and miss the effects, but a party nontheless.
Have fun, anon!

>>82551576
yeah fuck it, im down. feel free to drop a contact

are these liberty caps??

>>82539840
>my shit was def laced
I'm sorry you fell for that like this, anon. Remember to test new stuff on small doses before commiting to a full-on dose. Feel better soon!

>>82551777
yeah you're good bro. nice trips lmao

>>82525417
>Those who like adderall do you like MDMA?
Yes, but for different reasons.
>is it really comparable at all or is it a whole new thing
Well, both will stim you up, but the overall experience is much different from one to the other. Adderall is more of a treditional stim and will power you up enough to do activities like cleaning or studying or vibing to music and such but MDMA also releases oxytocin ("the loce chemical") which has more of a social effect (loving everyone/thing being more trusting and so on), makes tacktile feeling better so you'll want to touch everything and is also good at making music sound wayyy better. I'd recommend Adderall for private stim sessions (for business like studying and cleaning or pleasure like stimfapping or listening to music) and MDMA for social events with friends you trust. Both also make you talk a lot more than usual ime, but MDMA makes you more trusting and thus more prone to oversharing private things; which can be a mistake in the wrong crowd, so beware who you're rolling with, and what's their vibe/connection with you. In the end, both are fun and have their uses.
Have fun!

>>82551918
>MDMA also releases oxytocin
You mean serotonin, right? Serotonin release is the primary effect.

>>82541221
>what certain type of person prefers uppers
Usually people who like to be in control and on point with everything or really bored people; and have a pretty demanding/boreing lifestyles that require a boost-up of productivity and more stimulation in general. Also some stims provide euphoric effects that are apealing to some people who lack enjoyment in life. The rush feels good also.
>what certain type prefers downers
Ime, people with stuff to numb like hardships in life, and need the downer effect to put all of the stress and toughts aside, and people who like to lose control, give into the euphoria and nod for a few hours without any distractions. Also people who like/need the euphoria some downers (like opioids) provide becuse of lack of enjoyment in life(but, I mean, who doesn't like euphoria?). Those drugs are used more as an emotional crutch and escapism/copeing machenism ime. They also have a party useability since some downers (like alcohol) make you less inhibited and more likely to enjoy your night-out.
>psychs
Mostly people who like to think or are bored with reality, and want a more profound/interesting experience, or people who like to give into the trip and go for wild mental rides for a recreative/intellectual/spiritual reason. Also people with mental issues as psychs are known to help with mental problems like depression or being stuck thinking about something without being able to let go; they make you face those hardships face-on and are helpful in proccessing emotions/thoughts that were hard to gripe with; leaving you more finely-tuned than when you arrived, aka the afterglow effect (if you have the proper kind of trip, that is).
Microsoding psychs can help with boredom and procrastination, also, and will have a stimulating, focusing effects on low doses; and are way less harmful and less addictive than most stims are, being the safer choice for a lot of people who need a pick-me-up without the many risks of most stims.

>>82551576
damn ok i see how it is

>>82542474
>Turns out letting a physical addiction develop for months was a bad idea
Who knew? I hope you'll climb out of the withdrawals with relative ease, anon.
Also, out of interest, what drug of choice was your downfall?
Be aware of potential dependence symptoms and eliminate them as soon as possible, I say.

>>82542477
>teeth still hurt from clenching my teeth so hard during a molly trip
I recommend chewing on some gum to help with teeth-grinding and jaw-locking.

>>82542489
NTA.
>Try years, it's gonna take me the rest of my life to dig my way out of this shit
I hope you'll recover as soon as possible, anon. It might seem nightmarishly hard at times or frustrating, but it won't take the rest of your life and will get better at some point for sure! as long as you abstaine from use/relapse and taper down properly and take care of yourself/use supplements to combat withdrawal symptoms at their worse you'll get back to baseline at no-time; the body knows how to repair itself and is plastic more than you think, anon. Maybe take alcohol/kartom at moderate amounts to ease the experience a bit, which is is very common when dealing with withdrawals, afaik from reading anons' experiences and gripes with dependence.
Goodluck! I'm rooting for you.

P.S. Out of curiosity, what drug did you in?
Was it benzos? Those are too easy to use for way too long without noticing in time or caring, since you prolly will have a monthly script that will sustain and enable the abuse for long periods of time; while the doctor thinks they did a job well-done and not caution patiants about the risks of benzo use and addiction at all and priscribe way too much and even recommend daily use of too high of doses in the first place, ime.

>>82551636 95sorrows on discord bro

>>82542514
NTA.
>oxycodone but it's opiates in general
Oh, damn, that sucks, anon. Opioid abuse is definitly an easy way to get dependence issues quickly and rapidly without caring cus it's so peasureable to just keep going and taking it, from what I've heard on here. I was considering trying oxy myself but was diswayed as a result of stories of anons on here that fell hard for oxy/hard opies in general. I am curios about codiene though, and might give it a go for a very short amount of time/very few trys, just to say I've done it. Anyway, sure is a hard drug to kick from what I've heard!
Be sure to take care of yourself and stay clean (ofc), I believe in you and your chance of recovery, anon; it might seem hard at times or frustrating or even scary, but the body has a tendency to fix itself in the most amazing ways and is very plastic to it's enviornment; so keep your environment recovery-positive. Maybe use some supplements and vitamins or alcohol/kartom (at moderate amounts!) to combat the worst of the withdrawals, as you crawl back out of the hole you've sadly dug yourself into. You'll be back at baseline before you know it, I beileve this whole-heartedly.
Goodluck!

Anyone try 4-aco-met? How does it compare to shrooms? Feel like RCs are under discussed

>>82552614
Codeine is basically "baby's first Opiate" so if you don't go full retard you should be okay
A piece of advice I figured out the hard way: don't fuck around with routes of administration for opiates and stick with oral, I only became really addicted to oxy when I began snorting it.

>>82542706
NTA.
>hits hard because i know if(when) i get addicted to opioids that would be it for me, no way out, i'm too weak
Don't be a defeatist off the get-go, anon, believe in your strength and decipline abilities and set limits and red lines you won't cross ever no matter what and stick to it. And if it's true, and you know you're too weak, then don't do opioids in the first-place! Addiction takes-away your freedom, which is one of the only things we have in life by-right to preserve, cherish and exresize at will. Find potential dependence and eliminate it on sight, is my advice. Don't let a drug control you, and definitly don't fetishize it with music as it'll breed an unhealthy relationship with the drug mentally, which is bad, and is a one-way ticket to uncontrolable mentally, addiction-town, ime; psycological dependence depends very much on the relationship you create and nurture with the drug in time. Don't do something that you know you'll live to regret way beforehand, and fall into a self-made trap; it's just retarded and dengerous in the end, and will only lead to sure damnation; and that's not fun (the reason most of us do drugs, no?) And thus counteractive to the actual set goal of doing anything pleasureable in the first place.

Alright, I'm done preaching. Sorry in advance if I came-out as a know-it-all preacher, I'm not your mother after all :p.
All the luck and strength to you, anon! I hope and believe you'll make the right decision when push comes to shove.

>>82542710
>Got that meth, benzos, opce, 2fdck, 4homet
Get shit-faced on meth and then dose a lot of benzos (just shy of blacking-out. If you know your limits, that is) towards the end of the tweak to be in a blissfull haze, that is not quite sleep nor wakefullness, but is refreshing and restful nontheless. A combo that works everytime for me and is very enjoyable in general; leaving me energized and well-rested for the next day. Idk what the other, I assume, RCs are, though, so maybe you'll get better suggestions from more knowledgeable anons on here...
Have fun!

>>82548975
It was changed over 10 years ago and still no improvement, only getting worse. So idk. Easy to doubt. Like how prohibition didn't stop alcohol problems nor cannabis problems.

So to recap yesterday I did o-pce. Out of all the dissos I tried(ketamine, 2fdck, dmxe), this one was the least unpleasant. Gonna have to do alcohol now because I'm out of good drugs.

first time ketamine tonight what should i expect
i think ill start with 30mg then reup if i feel like it

>>82543246
>Hey stoners, how do you use weed?
Have been off the weed for a few months, now, but when I was a stoner it would be a DIY bong with a small ehough bowl that I could clear it everytime with one breath. Then it was just dropping bowl after bowl for the entire day 'till I go to sleep, or run out, which was unlikely cuz I'd buy a lot. That lasted about 6-8 months. Last time it happend it lasted 3-4 years, hehe.
Glad I stopped since it worsened my schizophrania symptoms by a bit (not to an uncomfortable enough level to quit at the time) and was a wallet-killer for the amounts I was consuming :p. You live and you learn, dropped it and never looked back!
>I've been curious about shit like shatter or live resin
I'm also am curious about extracts, waxs, resins etc. All we have here is a shitty blackmarket and resins/vape carts/waxes etc. are almost always if not always synthetic-cannabinoids which are very very dangerous and unhealthy, and led to many hospitalization of a lot of unwise consumers that were as curious as I am; as reported by the news, and a pro-cannabis e-zine I follow sometimes;that wrote an article about buying those products and then took them to a lab to be tested for actual THC, and found NONE in ALL of those potent products. As opposed to the market seemingly being modernized with all those high-potency products from "california" and so on, the reality is far more dark and dangerous.
A shame, I really would've tried the strong stuff, if it was legalized here; which is not likely to happen any-time soon by the looks of it as we have a very conservative government at the moment, that is very anti-drugs (they're also going to ban flavored eliquids for nic-vapes which will kill the industry, and leave me with no other options than nic-gum or tobbaco pouches, which I really, really don't want to smoke again;it's literal death that make your health drop by hell of a lot,at the doses I take:20mg;used to smoke >=60 rolled cigs a day, of marlboro-red)

>>82553394
Have you taken DXM? It feels like that but with far darker visuals and a more smooth 'clean' almost cold feeling. Personally, I did not enjoy it that much

>>82552252
Good post.
What do you think about deliriant users? They're the most enigmatic to me. Every person I've heard who takes mega-dosages of something like DPH to hallucinate never once seem like they're getting literally enjoyment, yet they go back to it every time.
Seems masochistic.

>>82553394
not sure if you ever felt dental anesthetic but it feels like that but in your whole body, also prepare a puke bucket incase you hurl

>>82546567
>i just took meth and creampied the neighbor girl I'd been flirting with.
just shot a load into her again. happy weekend, anons!

>>82529514
>Like many other miserable loser men out there I have a wife and a child, it's nothing surprising
Idk how many fathers in marriage there are on /drugfeel/, and I'm never having children for many reasons; but it *is* a sort of an accomplishment in my eyes, and is something to be proud of in the very least; raising a child is a lot of thankless work and you should have a pat on the back for doing even a small part of it. Hopefully, you won't fuck-up your child or be too lenient on drugs with them too young, as a regular /drugfeel/ visitor, that is, hehe. And imo you can't quite call yourself a loser, having such things in your life that must in the very least give you a sense of perpous, and drive, as well as some pride everyday.
I'm sorry you're saying you're miserable, though, truely.
What seems to be the problem exactly? (I don't mean to pry, just curiousity)
Also, what's your drug of choice?
Do you have proper alone-time to consume it privately and without any distractions or concerns these days? Some alone-time while raising a little-one is precious, afaik.
Having a wife who loves you enough to stay around and take care of a child along with you is also something to be a bit proud of, imo, as it is hard to maintaine a functioning marriage these days; as in many of cases, and takes a lot of effort to keep working in many ways such as partnership, division of labour, love, affection and a satisfying and exiting sex-life to boot; it can be complicated work, surely.

In any way, I hope for you a future full of good and long-lasting highs, short-lived lows and a sense of true pride; as your child grows-up, with your guidance, into a person you can be happy they became.

Goodluck! And know that whatever the situation and how hopeless it might seem, or how stuck you may feel you're, there is *always* a way out; and that's a good thing you can count on and remember, as a constant, in the harder times and the struggles that may come once in a while in life.

>>82552846
i completely agree with never crossing lines, with alcohol as an example it's hard to avoid drinking binges ever since i first crossed that line and drank many many days in a row, the month long binge i mentioned was the culmination of this and while sometimes i can drink somewhat responsibly and keep it to once a month if i keep using eventually i will relapse properly and suffer consequences for my actions so realistically i have to give up drinking altogether at this point
i've wanted to kill myself since i was 11, more than half of my life at this point and honestly while i can keep going until maybe 40 if i don't find something worth living i'm eventually going to give up and opioids are just the last hurrah where i have actually happy times for the last months or something of my life and then off myself after i run out of money to keep up the addiction
>Don't let a drug control you, and definitly don't fetishize it with music as it'll breed an unhealthy relationship with the drug mentally, which is bad, and is a one-way ticket to uncontrolable mentally, addiction-town, ime; psycological dependence depends very much on the relationship you create and nurture with the drug in time.
very very true and a big mistake i made when i was starting to abuse substances, especially that part about fetishizing it with music, i think i saw it as something better than what i had and a life where i at least had control of my own happiness but it's not very fun when you get to the point of proper addiction and i wish someone had told me this years ago
i am trying to be better but it's pretty hard to believe in future when i've been a shutin for 4 years at this point and never had a gf and barely see any people nowadays, again i just have to try to be better but honestly i always see full on uncontrollable addiction -> suicide as a way out (and something to look forward to as grim as that sounds) i guess
don't worry, i don't think you came off as preachy

>>82543571
>I'm trying lithium tomorrow, if it doesn't work I'll kms
I couldn't find any recreational examples of using lithium so I assume you're taking it as a prascribed medicine for some sort of mental illness. Goodluck! I hope you'll get good results, that it will help you and grant you better quality-of-life overall. Also, don't kill yourself just yet, anon, there's a pletora of viable psychotic drugs to choose from that could still help you have a better life! Just keep trying, is my advice; I did it when I was very suicidal, and it worked, I found my meds of choice and now my suicidal thoughts are a thing of the long-forgotten past, thankfully enough! Also my quality-of-life improved significantly and my illness (plain old schizophrania) vecame much more manageble and navigateable mentally, which is all that I can hope for at this point, I guess.
>Ask me anything
As a general curiousity, what are you taking it for?
Have you tried different meds for long and have commited to the treatment proccess, or are just hedging all your bets on lithium as an arbitrary last-resort?
What is your experience with other psychotic meds and their side-effects?Idk what meds people who get prescribed with lithium try and take in the trial-and-error phase of medicated psychiatric treatment.
How do you deal with your illness on a daily basis; Is it really hard to manage or is relatively simple and navigateable most of the time?
How long have you had suicidal thoughts and how serious are you about taking that route if nothing helps, as a way to end suffering? Also what route of exit are you planning to use?
Are you blaming the suicidal thoughts on the illness itself or the suffering it causes through its symptoms?
Hope it's not too many questions or too personal.
Goodluck again with the lithium and don't forget to have fun! Even at the dark times and maybe, especially in the dark times; as a coping machanism if anything else, like an optimistic outlook or hope for a better future.

>>82546123
>Meth and MDMA/Ecstasy mixed together in powder form?
As a way to cut stuff with similar additives as filler? it's low and dangerous to the customer as it can be overdosed on easily without noticing and by taking avarage-higher doses of whatever drug you've been told it is. It's also needlessly more toxic that way and a seriouse health risk pysically and mentally on top of it all.
As an intentional combo?
I think it's overkill and will have distracting counter-effects that'll make the experience not fun and a hassle to deal with and manage mentally and pysically; with the added sensory stimulation, oxytocin release, tectilie enhancement and the mere overstimulating neture that MDMA already has, as opposed to the clear-cut focus and rush of the methamphetamine that will lead you to be wayyy over-stimulated and overwhelmed for a good time to be had. And again, needlessly toxic, and a health concern in and of itself. Imo, not worth the waste of good drugs to be over-stimulated out of your head, and losing it in a stim-induced delirium state which is a very likely outcome to have happen with those two potent stims combined.

Definitly *not* recommend on paper, but maybe would be a good combo at properly messured, low enough doses, and I just worry too much; so take with a pinch of salt since I never actually tried it mixed myself, just saying from personal knowledge and my experience with the two subsances and their effects separately, on multiple occations and different situations and settings; including, but not only: alone, with good/not too good friends/druggie-strangers, at music festivals and/or band concerts, just chilling listening to music and taking it easy, for a pick-me-up to be productive, low doses, mild doses, too high of doses for personal taste and ability to control properly mentally and/or pysically, doses that were teetering on the edge of an actual clinical OD, deep delirium states, etc etc etc. So I've got *some* experience, I guess.

>>82546450
>why not just take actual downers or actual psychs
A good question to ask. It's more predictible effect-wise and more potent to use downers and psychedelics insted of the wild and unpredictible side-effects of weed like paranoia and over-stimulation/going-crazy/thinking you're gonna die, on higher doses or more potent mediums of use like extracts, dabs, unmessureabley-dosed edibles and the like.
>Also I get really paranoid on it these days
Same. I used weed until it started hitting me badly a few months ago; with paranoia, overstimulation of the mind/senses, intrusive thoughts, severe dissociation from reality in an non-comfy way, and it aggrevated my mental illness symptoms to an uncomfortable and unmanageable degree; and stopped cold-turkey on a whim. Best decision I've made in regards of quitting a drug indefinitly and completely. Never looked back, and much happier, focused, interested in reality and motivated, daily, as a result. Weed is a cheap low-tier drug imo, with annoying side-effects that are a drag to deal with and are not fun or worth the minor sedation, slight relaxation, general sensory stimulation/enhancement, or the mild psychedelic-esque effects it provides as a package deal with some dreadful down-sides. It was actually fun in high-school, as far as I remember, but I didn't try any other drug until 18, of fear of the unknown and the potential danger, to compare; so it might've been why I abused it daily for years, until I tried actual psychs like LSD and downers like benzos or a little alcohol, and had a point of reference and new-found prespective when it comes to me seeing weed as an enjoyable, flexible, multi purpose effect-wise, fun drug to use; esp on a daily basis, on high doses; abusing it a lot like I used to do for way too long a time of my youth and early adulthood, as well.
In conclusion, I concur. Weed kinda sucks unless you casualy seek a low-mild dosed, "light-drug" experience with a low risk of adddiction and toxicity.

I've been smoking this strain called apple fritter lately. Good strain but whenever I smoke it I feel an extremely strong urge to repeatedly say the word nigger and I do. This doesnt happen with any other strain Ive tried.

>>82546567
>i just took meth and creampied the neighbor girl I'd been flirting with
On meth rn, having a generally good time, but gf is too far away to creampie. Whatever, the high is good and strong, and the night is young and full of surprises! Have lots of fun, anon! It's not everyday you get to creampie a cutie while on meth, after all; at least, I never had the chance to, hehe. Be careful of mistakingly impragnating her, though; unless you want to, and trying, for some kind of degenerate impragnation fetish, I guess. Also, in all truth, condoms suck big, fat, ass, deinitely; better to make her take the pill and get it over with ime, and creampie her at will freely, which is based and way more superior to using shit-ass condoms that numb the experience marginally, and make you frustrated and under-stimulated and eventually soft and bitter, for a cheap way of protection (unless you suspect STDs, I suppose. I figure your girl is clean, though).

Again, make sure to have lots of fun while it lasts, anon! May we be blessed with many highs like that in the near future.
Cheers!

>>82553727
yes ive done dxm
why didnt u like it ?

>>82553921
will do hopefully i wont throw up i only had some pretzels and an ice cream bar in the last couple hrs

>captcha 2DAYS
ominous...

>>82555904
>better to make her take the pill and get it over with ime, and creampie her at will freely
she has a birth control implant.

>>82518123 (OP)
I'm gonna do mushrooms for the first time soon how should i go about it?

Last night I had the most outrageous, ludicrous, ridiculous yayo ever. It was so pure it was in clumps straight off the brick. I have never felt euphoria like that before, crazy stuff no wonder why girls love that shit, problem is massive stimdick lmao.

>>82555842
I've had this exact issue before. I was in an uber and wanted to scream NIGGER surrounded by the driver and 3 friends. Kek.

Ketamine didn't come in in time to have it with my mushrooms, should I just use mdma instead?

150 mg ritalin with no tolerance. Am I retarded?

>day 1 no weed
fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk

>>82556745
being a weedhed has to be the gayest thing ever

>>82553187
the context was that older people used to love getting prescribed painkillers

>>82556699
Yeah. In one go or over a session?

>>82556760
embarrassing 5 minute delete

>>82556816
sorry it wasn't a nice thing to say

>>82556813
In one go. I got benzos though so I should be fine

>>82550747
Strong disagree. I had an entire bag last night and the euphoria was incredible but my stuff was pure. Weirdly enough my heart, while fast, was not beating out of my chest. Coke is great for shorter sessions with company desu. I blew my $100 in 12 hours. It made me want to never touch meth though. I seriously want to do good coke with a qt grill.

>>82556854
Yeah good luck that's crazy high.

>>82556900
Lol thanks mate. I'm not too familiar with stimulants so I guess I'll learn my limits tonight.

>>82556919
Wait, instant release or extended?

>>82556987
ER. I didn't bother crushing them up or anything because I need to have attention for a bit.

>>82547407
Search on the clearnet for local/nearby drug-related Telegram groups. From there you'll be able to find vendor advertisement group-links as they're so common and often in-your-face kinda annoying. Worst case, ask around for a link to an ad group or a good vendor from the groups' people, they'll likely be helpful, friendly and chill ime. Find a vendor ad that looks legit enough, like a vid of the drugs on sale and set price-tags on single grams and larger amounts in the ad image itself (some vendor ad groups have review bots you can use to see if a dealer is legit and what quality their shit is, generally) and sells what you want, preferably an ad that shows his prices upfront so he won't try to mark-up prices later on w/you; and has a wide-reaching delivery-range so they'll get all the way to your home, obviously; and send them a text asking about drug X and the price to be sure and avoid scams. Often you'll need to varify yourself with a face-pic and timestamp and/or a pic of you with an illegal drug like a bud of weed or a baggie of whatever you've got laying around, and/or a video of you saying the current date and time of day and similar methods of varifying you're a real, trusted, safe, potentialy returning, client and not secretly a cop trying to lure them with a fake profile and pics. In my country you'll send an ID pic for age n' 2 c who u r fr fr; but it's very rare abroad. After varifying, earning the vendors' trust as a legit customer that is safe to send people to without a worry of them arrested for dealing, you've got a new dealer! Just send them what you want, amount, and a location, and they'll get to you in 45mins or less usually. Remember to check the price with the seller on *every* purchase to avoid inconviniance and being uppriced. Ime more gs u get the cheaper it is overall than 1/0.5g will be, so plan your funds according to your expected rate of drug use to max worth and save money when buying. GoodLuck! Good hunting!
Or use DNMs:p

>>82556998
Oh well that's different. Still high but damn I thought you meant IR. Wew.

>>82554175
Being a father and a familyman does give me purpose, and "A man with a why can bear almost any how", that's why I can confidently say that I won't die until my children are adults.
Doesn't prevent me from being unhappy though, that's two different things I guess. As to the why I have big marriage issues, my relationship with my wife has been declining slowly over the years and I've been grasping as everything I can to try to keep it together but it's still falling apart and it's killing me slowly, terrible feeling to be a such a failure of a man every day that I can't satisfy my wife's needs and wants.
She kind of thinks I'm a loser that lacks ambition, doesn't earn enough money, doesn't have hobbies that interest her, etc. So she barely looks at me, barely ever touches me, barely ever interest herself in what I think.
We're not modern people so we don't believe in divorce except in extreme cases, neither she nor I will leave just because we're unhappy with the other, or fell out of love, or whatever. So it's not such an achievement to not have her divorce me lol, I'd have to beat her for that to happen.

I like stims, psychs, and downers. Empathogens, a lot, like MDMA, 6-APB, 3-MMC, etc. classic psychs like LSD and psilocybin, and downers like phenibut and GHB. Don't really have a DoC, I don't have habits or addictions.

Thanks for reading my blogpost.

>>82555842
A nigger strain? Based.

>>82556418
FIVE STAR DAYS BISH

>>82557012
Yeah desu just use DNMs, don't contact weird telegram dudes and send them your I'd whatever crazy shit.
If reddit retards on r/darknet can manage it, so can you.

>>82556806
I would love to get proper medicine too. Hate the culture of no fun allowed because few depressed retards kill themselves anyway

>>82557054
FIVE BAR DAYS BIIIISH
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY4Ij8ql2kE

>>82557066
you used to gett prescribed opiates/opioids when you had something like a very sore throat, mild dental work, etc. and now you need to essentially break your arm. in front of the doctor. twice. never forget what they took from you

>>82556894
NTA.
>It made me want to never touch meth though
Why write off a drug like that cuz of coke from all things? The truth is an oral meth high is absolutely superior to a coke high; being more potent overall and way longer lasting with very good effects like great fine-point focus, a good body rush feeling and more euphoria in general, getting way more bang for your buck as long as it's pure enough/not cut with any filler stuff. And you won't waste as much money for a shitty, low-tier, short-lived high, often and compulsive redosing, and ruining your nose snorting bagfulls of the stuff to get a basic buzz going. I recommend oral meth a lot as it treats me well. You won't be disapointed trying it, guaranteed. Just make sure to space useage properly throughout the weeks to avoid addiction and health issues from neuro/cardiac toxicity and such potential risks meth sadly has related to it (in other words, know your drug and research it well before using it). Have fun, whatever you choose, but don't throw away meth so carelessly as it *is* the superior drug by all accounts and prespectives possible objectively speaking, full-stop. It even is better than regular street amphetamine imo, as those highs tend to be very tweaky with more common facial ticks and robottic-feeling as well as shorter lasting and way less euphoric, ime. Unless you're looking for the very specific shorter high and lower euphoria per gram that coke gives, I guess you could say it's better for your taste, specifically speaking and subjectively.

>>82556299
Depends entirely on the type of person you are. Start with small doses if inexperienced with psys. Do what you usually enjoy doing and you will be okay, avoid being in high places when you dosed because mushroom taking people seem to think they can fly, also avoiding being with strangers is an advice I'd love to have hearing before trying drugs.

>>82557311
Look I've done a lot of dex, never had euphoria like this. Don't really want any more.

>>82550802
NTA.
>with no opiates to make me content with it
Using opiets as a copeing mechanism and an emotional crutch is a sure-fire, fool-proof way to get addicted fast and hard with little wiggle room to quit without experiencing horrific withdrawals that may get you to relapse to avoid feeling them and'll get you stuck in a loop of use that doesn't feel good anymore due to rapid tolerance buildup, which is not fun at all (and fun is a usual goal of recreational drug use, no? So it'll be counter-productive to achieveing the goal, quickly, and'll be a detriment in general; not to mention opies being a major money-eating hobby to have, which can lead to ruining your life in many creative and definitly not-fun ways, unavoidably and uncontrolably).
Insted, try a planed-out regimen of oral stim use. They're good for emotional comfort and relif as they induce some euphoria and make life way more interesting and fun with lower addiction risk relative to opies; and have more bang for your buck since some stims (like meth) last for 8-12 hours on avarage and don't take much to get a solid buzz from. Also the withdrawals with a good diciplined, well spaced-out, use-regimen are very minor and only manifest as mild lethargy for like 2 days before returning to baseline level. Stims can be used weekly/biweekly with relative safety and predictible effects; with very minor health risks or dependence issues to them (as long as you stick to a set max dose, mind tolerance buildup and a subsequent pysical dependence and harsher withdrawals on the pre-decided sober breaks (~7-14 days off the stuff will do wonders for tolerance and any potential health concerns) for tolerance and accumulated toxicity to go down in a steady rate to a low enough lvl to start using again with no major worries. Pls consider oral stims as a safer substitute to opies, anon.
Anyway you choose, be safe and have fun!
Sorry for the long post :p
Goodluck.

ketamine is ayayayayayayaua ^_^
@_@

>>82556469
I don't know. Should you? Seems like that's your choice, not anyone else's.

Do you need me to tell you to wipe your ass after you take a shit too?

Fucking wish I didn't have to wait a month between DXM trips to reset tolerance.
I also wish I wasn't 30 years old, I don't recover from falling on my tailbone while dissociated as easily anymore.

>>82557895
Your piercings make you look faggy. What you trying to prove?

>>82550747
>Why the fuck is cocaine so shit, how is this drug even remotely popular?
Because when you get real coke, it's actually fun to use. The market is just filled with cut garbage cuz of how many times it changes hands on the way to NA.

In other words, your coke is actual garbage.

>>82551283
>Can i do myself in with this painlessly?
Probably, yes.
I recommend taking a long walk and really think about going trough with this, though. Life can get way better as long as you actively act to make it better and there's always a light at the end of the tunnle, no matter how long it is and as hard and impossible as it might seem to you right now.
>I've wanted to die / not exist forever
If that is a true fact and an unseperable part of you, then you shouldn't feel guilt for doing what you desire even if it's selfish, as it is your god-given right to end it anytime you like and however you choose to do it; it's the most basic of freedoms we have in life and shouldn't be frowned upon by people like it is these days (and maybe always).
Obviously I hope you choose life as it will guaranteed to get better with a bit of effort (and I, personally, love life a whole lot; despite being suicidal for many years before breaking free from those thoughts and finally gain a positive outlook on life), but you're a free man with all that entails. May you choose the right decision, whatever it is, and may you also not suffer needlessly in any case.
Goodluck! Be safe and maybe talk to your family a little bit to cheer up and get prespective.

>>82557029
>I've been grasping as everything I can to try to keep it together but it's still falling apart and it's killing me slowly
What specifically are the issues?

>>82557029
>She kind of thinks I'm a loser that lacks ambition, doesn't earn enough money, doesn't have hobbies that interest her, etc. So she barely looks at me, barely ever touches me, barely ever interest herself in what I think.
to me this sounds like her issue, not yours. why did she marry you if she wasn't happy with you?

>>82557311
>The truth is an oral meth high is absolutely superior to a coke high; being more potent overall and way longer lasting with very good effects like great fine-point focus, a good body rush feeling and more euphoria in general, getting way more bang for your buck as long as it's pure enough/not cut with any filler stuff.
all of this is wrong other than meth being cheaper and longer lasting.

but if you have the money to keep redosing coke, it's just objectively better than meth.

>>82558001
what made you see piercings and automatically decide that he's wearing them to impress you?

have you considered that his piercings have nothing to do with your preferences?

>>82558001
idk i just think they're cool

>>82552244
>You mean serotonin, right? Serotonin release is the primary effect
It denies reabsobtion of Serotonin making more of it to stay in your system longer, but I mean Oxytocin as in "the bonding chemical" MDMA releases as a major common effect, being primerily an empathogen.

>>82557895
ketamine is so short tho thats like the biggest downside

i could easily see myself being addicted to this

>>82558049
She was happy with me, 15 years ago.
But her priorities changed.

What would be the risks of taking MDMA while on treament with escitalopram 10mg + bupropion 150mg?

>>82553747
>What do you think about deliriant users?
I honestly have no idea why anyone would take a deliriant willingly for recreational purpose or any purpose for that matter. My only guess is that they are appealed to the escapism of losing yourself in a deliriant state with no care for real life while having wacky and entertaining delusions the feel more real relative to common psychedelics where you know what you're seeing is the drugs effects. It might also have spiritual properties and reasons to it as well. But my guess is a good as yours on this subject. A tricky type of drug to do responsibly and remotely enjoyably, I'm truly stumped.

>>82552666
>Codeine is basically "baby's first Opiate" so if you don't go full retard you should be okay
Good to know, that's what I gathered from what people gere were saying.
>don't fuck around with routes of administration for opiates and stick with oral
Thanks for the advice. I always prefer oral anyway, as it's the least uncomfortable or invasive of ROAs.
>I only became really addicted to oxy when I began snorting it
I have been avoiding smoking or snorting the meth I use specifically for that reason, and have successfully avoided addiction so far. Some ROAs are more addictive by nature with higher bioavailability and rapid, potent effects that come up in seconds of administration.

>>82558403
Try boofing next time.

>>82554604
>i am trying to be better but it's pretty hard to believe in future when i've been a shutin for 4 years at this point and never had a gf
I'ce been a shutin for 7 years now, 5 of which were 8n complete isolation with no contact with anybody. These last 3 years, after getting on disability and getting my own place and even finding a shutin gf who is very similar to me, my life have become much better and worth living; and I gained a positive outlook on life in general. Life will guaranteed become better and worth living as long as you act to make it better, I believe; wether it being stopping destructive behaviors like quitting certain drugs or seeking help from a professional.
>i always see full on uncontrollable addiction -> suicide as a way out (and something to look forward to as grim as that sounds)
I used to be suicidal for years (about 10 +- a few) and the thought of death have comforted me in hard times, so I know what you're saying. I had a noose in my room ready for me for a month, close to my breaking point at the time. I got close a few times and wrapped the rope around my neck a couple of times but never jumped, and I'm glad I didn't. Nowdays my suicidal thoughts are a thing of the past and I love life, despite the hardships and suffering I experience on a daily basis. Keep trying, anon. There's always a light at the end of the tunnle, no matter how long it is. I'm rooting for you! fwiw.

But if shit really hits the fan, a last party with opies and a swift end won't be the worst way to go; and you're free to do so whenever you like. I obviousely hope you choose life abd keep trying, but you are a free man with all that entails, for better or worse.

Goodluck and all the best.

>>82558273
>She was happy with me, 15 years ago.
are you sure? maybe there were red flags you overlooked.

>>82557029
>"A man with a why can bear almost any how"
A good saying.
>terrible feeling to be a such a failure of a man every day that I can't satisfy my wife's needs and wants
You're just a man, and it sounds like she's pissy and scrutinizes every move you make meanly and unnecessarily. You are not a loser for not being able to keep up with unrealistic expectations and criticisms of your way of life and ambitions and hobbies or lack thereof. You sound like you're doing well, trying, considering the situation you're in. Keep going, anon. I'm rooting for you!
>We're not modern people so we don't believe in divorce except in extreme cases, neither she nor I will leave just because we're unhappy with the other, or fell out of love, or whatever
A shame since my first advice would be to divorse her if she looks down on you like you say she does, and you're as unhappy as you say you are. You deserve to be happy, even if it means to break the family apart. But I guess I won't change your mindset so I won't try. Maybe try couples counseling or find an activity you can do together to bond over? Maybe even an MDMA trip together or something.
>I like stims, psychs, and downers
Same here, I like LSD for a psych, meth for a stim and benzos for downers, myself. But meth is definitly my DoC these days as I do it once a week or two and it gives me something to look forward to. But also don't have addictions or such issues.
>Empathogens, a lot, like MDMA, 6-APB, 3-MMC
I only tried MDMA and never heard of 6-APB before, but I like empathogens less nowdays that I don't have friends to do them with.
Goodluck, anon, and remember to have fun! No matter how dark the situation may be.

>>82556215
>she has a birth control implant
Nice. No worries then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44GB53rnI3c&list=RD44GB53rnI3c&start_radio=1&pp=ygUZc3RyYXdiZXJyeSBmaWVsZHMgZm9yZXZlcqAHAQ%3D%3D

>>82556299
>how should i go about it?
Set up activities you enjoy to be ready before you dose since it might be hard to get something going under influence. Have all you might need at arms reach, like toilet paper or snacks or headphones with music ready and so on so you'll feel ready to take on any situation. Take care of yourself pysically, too, like streaches and massaging your muscles and such, as it can help you stay in control of the trip better ime. Start with a low dose to check how you're fairing with the experience vefore commiting to the full trip and get good at self-soothing in the harder/intense points of the trip, usually the peak; remember, you're peaking, not tweaking. Also avoid thought loops by grounding yourself with a mantra or looking around the room and noting to yourself what you notice is in there. I only did LSD so I can't give any shroom-specific advice but those two psychs should be similar enough in effects. I also heard of nausea when taking shrooms so have a trash can ready if you end up throwing-up. Also listen to what >>82557343 said, as it seems like good, informed advice.
Have a good trip and have fun!

>>82556469
>Ketamine didn't come in in time to have it with my mushrooms, should I just use mdma instead?
Those are two vastly different combos so it depends on what you're looking for from the experience. Afaik, psychs and MDMA go well together. Idk about ket since I never had any, but heard it has a psychedelic side to it as well. Though the disso effect of ket sound like it'll counter act the shrooms' effects but idk.
Anyway, have fun!

>>82556699
>150 mg ritalin with no tolerance. Am I retarded?
You might cery well be. 150mg is a whole lot for zero tolerance so be prepared for stim-induced delirium state at best and an OD heart failiure at worst in the case of taking it all at one go. I heard 200mg of meth at once with no tolerance can be fatal so I suppose it's similar with other stims. Your heart is going to be bursting out of your chest. Though if you spaced-out the use ocer a long enough period of time it shouldn't be as bad imo.
Goodluck, man.
Keep us up to date on how it went and if you survived.

>>82557065
>don't contact weird telegram dudes
Say what you will, but it's very conviniant to have my drugs get to me in 45mins or less and are decent quality and relatively cheap, too.
DNMs have the risk of customs sizeing the package, and at worst, raiding your house. Importing drugs internationally is a serious offence in some places, way more than plain personal use stuff.

>>82557375
>Don't really want any more
Fair enough. Be happy with what you've got, man.
>>82558063
>all of this is wrong other than meth being cheaper and longer lasting
Have you ever done meth before? I do on a weekly/biweekly basis and am describing what I've experienced first-hand.
>but if you have the money to keep redosing coke, it's just objectively better than meth
Can't be more wrong. Coke is a low-tier drug that only got popular due to the status it gives users. The high is very much objectively worse than meth's high on paper, being a more potent substence and inducing focus, a rush and euphoria, as I said, and takes way less to get high from, in relation to coke's "let's do the whole bag" attitude of compulsive redosing; making it superior in every sense, from effect-wise to bang for your buck wise.

>>82558422
>Try boofing next time
I don't think I will, actually. Also, I don't have a syringe on hand.

>>82559164
Use one of those crazy long straws we had as children.
Blow it in your ass!

Wait when you do boofing you inject water in your butt, right?
How do you not instantly want to shit it out, how do you keep it inside? And for how long?

>>82557029
>She kind of thinks I'm a loser that lacks ambition, doesn't earn enough money, doesn't have hobbies that interest her, etc. So she barely looks at me, barely ever touches me, barely ever interest herself in what I think.
Anon, I don't say this lightly, but I feel you are already in a very real danger of being discarded by this woman, and that it would be in your best interest to cut things off sooner, rather than later.

If it genuinely seems like you are pushing boulders up a hill for her with nothing reciprocated, or even appreciated, then I don't see that there's much more to be gained by drawing it out. You're just wasting more time.

>>82559108
>Have you ever done meth before? I do on a weekly/biweekly basis and am describing what I've experienced first-hand.
Yes, I use it way, way too much. I am in fact addicted to amphetamines, and not to coke.
>Coke is a low-tier drug that only got popular due to the status it gives users.
Yeah, so you've only done garbage coke. A lot of people who have only ever had garbage coke, also seem to be under the impression that meth has stronger euphoria. And it makes total sense to believe this, considering how completely trash almost all coke in USA is.

How much viagra (sildenafil) can you get away with while high on coke? This stuff gives me ED even when I'm only lightly high. 100mg is the maximum dose for viagra, I'm guessing this is from the FDA. Could I get away with taking 200mg? Coke is a vasoconstrictor, and viagra is a vasodilator, but it's very selective for the penis and I believe lungs. The lungs part is likely what causes issues with overdose. Is it dangerous to mix high dose viagra with cocaine?

>>82559812
Its a very common combination so you will probably be fine

>>82559819
Even if I take twice the FDA recommended maximum dose? I'm wondering if the coke would cancel out the overdose risk of viagra.

>>82559819
>>82559829
I wonder if viagra can be snorted. I've heard that a lot of drugs, at least in certain chemical forms, can't be absorbed via insufflation. I've heard that the drug needs to be water soluble in order to be insufflated. I've also heard that certain drugs are prodrugs, so they need to be swallowed in order to turn into the substance that actually does something to you.

>>82559851
anything water soluble can be insufflated/boofed.

>>82559812
You'll have better results without as much heart strain with tadalafil instead of sildenafil.

>>82559857
I just asked chatgpt. Sildenafil is water-soluble. Chatgpt warned me that it could have fillers and binders within it. I'm glad I got mine through a steroid supplier website. It comes in capsule form. I could just dump it out and insufflate it. Maybe I'll only do that with around 20mg (the amount in each capsule) to have the effects come sooner, since I don't want to do anything stupid, and I'll take a few more pills orally after that.

>>82559907
You have no idea if it's more bioavailable through the nose than through the mouth though.

Turns out that Pregabalin while having a fever wasn't a great idea.
Now I feel sick AND retarded.

>>82559965
You're right. Maybe I should just swallow 200mg of pills around half an hour before starting the coke.

>>82559972
i'm on a shit ton of gabapentin and muscle relaxers with a cold. not as fun as pregab i've heard, but my body def hates me less rn.

How do you deal with short-term cocaine comedown? I've been high for a few hours, and this is my second binge since I got an 8 ball after not having any since March 2024. The last time I had a comedown, I felt pretty awful. I'm a very neurotic person, but I feel pretty damn good with low-neuroticism when I'm high on coke, but being buzzed can make me feel a bit more neurotic. I felt a lot of intense shame, depression, dysphoria, and fear, like I have no control of myself. I felt like a complete loser.

Could I just do something like take a few very small bumps for a few hours to slow down the comedown? I know I'm going to be pretty tired, since I've been up since around 2:00 PM yesterday.

I love booty, by the way.

>>82559965
It's usually more, because it skips 1st pass metabolism.

>>82527783
Don't touch that stuff again. Speaking from experience. Will destory your life and take things from you that you will never get back

>>82560384
Coke comedown is like nothing though. It's over in an hour.

>>82560479
The previous time i had it, it lasted a couple hours. I'm a bit afraid of it. I'm not getting insanely high, and I've only been doing lines that are around 1/10th of a gram, but from being high like this last time, that was enough to make me feel terrible. Maybe my mind is just fucking with me, but I'm naturally a very neurotic person. I receive NEETbux, but I'm only able to waste money on stupid shit because my dad is providing me with housing and food (he does use my flexcard for food, which is around $240 through my health insurance, though). I get a bit less than $1000 directly deposited into my bank account towards the end of each month.

What drugs other than opiates make you content with limbo?

On Ritalin, nicotine, ephedrine and caffeine.
Holy fuckkk this is good

>>82559799
>Yes, I use it way, way too much
Then idk what to tell you, you're either getting bunk shit or have too high of tolerance to experience the drugs effects fully; cuz I've experienced all of the aforementioned effects without fail and predictibly everytime I use meth after a proper T-break (7-14 days, usually). The focus, the body rush, the euphoria, the stimulation, everything. And it seems superior to the short, mid-level, compulsive redosing high of coke in my eyes.
>I am in fact addicted to amphetamines, and not to coke
Amphetamine dependence is easily avoidable if you've got your shit together and limit yourself to certain doses at certain times, so it's bad habbits coming from you, not the amphetamines' addiction risk itself; we all have psychonautwiki and access to information on the subject of safe drug use with ways to minimize risks like addiction and toxicity buildup and such. Also, a coke addiction is harder to achieve for most people since it's a money-sink (so you are limited by the amount you can afford atm), is usually done and runs out in one or two sessions of compulsive redosing (so not long enough of exposure to the drug to get addicted) and can be done only once a paycheck/month reasonably for most lower-middle to middle class working folk.
>considering how completely trash almost all coke in USA is
I will admit that pure coke is better and more euphoric (maybe even more than oral meth, I haven't tried other ROAs, that should be more potent and euphoric) and fun than street coke. Coke has its moments for sure, depends on what you want, as in specifically a short high atm (desu and to not mislead you, I've not done coke, as I hate snorting and it's not worth the money imo, but read a lot about it, along with hearing stories on /drugfeel/); yet, it's still low-tier on paper by all accounts. Meth easily takes the cake as the better drug to use; especially when noting the positive effects and the long-term sustainability it offers vs coke's.

I hope the xanax stops me from feeling anything right now holy shit let this be over please

>>82560944
What's wrong, anon? Is it a drug withdrawal or general issues with negative emotions?

>>82560955
just drug withdrawals, mornings are the worst.

>>82560384
>>82560540
Sorry to break it to you like this but your cocaine is DEFINITELY cut with meth or another stimulant. Pure high quality cocaine has 0 comedown and when I say zero I mean none at all, there is maybe an hour or so of 'comedown' but its almost unnoticeable. Amphetamines on the other hand are exactly what you are describing.

>>82561575
>Amphetamines on the other hand are exactly what you are describing.
The half life is still what you'd expect. I'm also generally a very neurotic person with OCD. I'm going through withdrawal right now, and I've been going through waves of intense anxiety and shame.

>>82561575
>>82561614
It's gotten a bit better, but I was literally sweating bullets just around 10 minutes ago from the anxiety.

>>82560733
What do you mean by "limbo"?

>>82559799
I don't see this argument going into new directions. I can't change your mind, with your poor experience with meth and high opinions on coke, and you won't change mine, having meth treat me very nicely and potently and have learned that coke is not all that great.
Let's agree to disagree and call it even; otherwise, we'll just regurgitate the same points and opinions over and over again needlessly.
May you experience the full benefits of meth properly the next time you use it (and kick your amphetamine habbit with ease and minor discomfort).
And may I try real, pure, coke to be able to compare it to meth in an actual informed way.
All the best, love and kisses xoxo.
Cheers!

After a couple of annoyances THCA sites insisting on needing to see a up to date ID I just went to a local smoke shop instead and bought what the clerk recommended.

Will finally give this stuff a try on my day off (mon).
It certainly smells exactly like weed for sure. Going to need a air tight jar or something or it's going to smell up my teas and herbs eventually.

i took 1500mg of pregabaline and i dont feel shit
how much time i have to wait to take effect?????

>>82558308
serotonin syndrome

>>82563068
Give it another hour.

1 gram of cannabis lasts me 5-7 days. Not sure how some people can do 1g in a day

>>82563121
im in the middl of a tramadol withdrawal man this sucks

>>82562812
Smoked/Vaped/Carted actual weed
Vaped/Carted D8

Smoking/Vaping(Dry) THC-A is a /very/ similar feeling to actual weed, much more pleasant and notable than D8 for sure

>>82558977
I survived, my heart hurt kind of bad but I had a good time generally and got some shit done. The comedown is kicking my ass even ~15 hrs later though. Super nauseous. Taking 150 was a dumb split second decision anyway. I'll think it through next time

>>82561649
atleast how I see it, it's just permaNEETdom.
I can't function in school environments so I'll drop out or have my chronic illness put me out of comission for me, and no place will hire me, so I rot in my childhood bedroom, all day, every day.
I had people recommend me to get a hobby but nothing I tried makes me feel any better

>>82563194
https://youtube.com/shorts/lyueiY7azMw?si=4wAwpv-IXNEIF2aJ

>>82563387
After hearing his songs, I really doubt this moron knows what an ounce is

>>82563338
>I survived
He lives! Good to hear you didn't crash your heart.
>I had a good time generally and got some shit done
I'm glad. I've read somewhere that you took extended-release Ritalin so it must have been saving you some unpleasentness in the first place being released slowly like it did.
>The comedown is kicking my ass even ~15 hrs later though
For sure. It was a heroic dose to take in the first place so obviously the come-down will be a bitch. Stay hydrated and rest your head for a bit; your body's still proccessing what it has been through.
>Taking 150 was a dumb split second decision anyway. I'll think it through next time
Yeah, it was dumb, but you owned it and had a good time which is what really matters in the end.
Be careful with stims in the future as they can cause permanent neural damage as well as heart problems. And yeah, think it through before commiting to such a big and potentially dangerous dose on any drug you may take in the future. As a rule of thumb, dosage should be carefully planned-out ahead of time in accordence to the desired experience, and messured as accurately as possible, to ensure a safe and enjoyable drug use experience!
Glad everything turned out well in the end and you didn't die or hurt yourself with neuro/cardiac toxicity and had a good time overall.
Goodluck dealing with the come-down, take it easy for a while and let your body return to baseline level as easilysoon as possible.

>>82563642
thanks mate i really only do stims like once a month so ill be careful next time for sure

just found 20mg zolpidem left over in my drawer, worth anything? Should I maybe smoke some weed with it

>>82563691
it's an interesting combo, but you have to stay awake on it, I personally only did it once and didn't feel interested enough to do it again.

>>82563683
>thanks mate
No sweat!
>i really only do stims like once a month so ill be careful next time for sure
It's smart to stick to prescribed Retalin and to space-out the stim use for once a month (for health reasons, tolerance lowering and dependence avoidance), I wish I had that decipline to stay off stims for that long but I take 7-14 days max before binging again on the devil's meth. Good to know you'll be careful next time; I was as worried as a stranger online can be about your health at the time. At least you've got a good story and some solid life experience out of it, so not too bad of a mistake overall as I see it.
Cheers!

>>82564251
cheers to you too

I'm so fucking sad that weed now just causes me to disassociate, I so badly miss getting completely blazed and just laying in bed in dreamland on my weekends

Did 3.5 grams of Psilocybe azurescens thought I died and went to heaven now I am a diagnosed schizophrenic currently living at a mental hospital and being medicated. I'll never be the same.

>>82532019
Monopolies that suffocate every other business is not capitalism.
Socialism does not mean lack of free market.

My people will support my people and my people have boundaries that cause thriving.

To have unconditional free market only results in invasion.

It is the monopolies that killed drug legality because they are honestly a bunch of invaders that fear all that is not suppressed.

>>82559851
NTA.
>I've heard that a lot of drugs, at least in certain chemical forms, can't be absorbed via insufflation. I've heard that the drug needs to be water soluble in order to be insufflated. I've also heard that certain drugs are prodrugs, so they need to be swallowed in order to turn into the substance that actually does something to you
I can confirm, you've heard right on all of these facts, anon. Some drugs cannot be snorted (like heroin #3, afaik, but don't take my word for it as Idk a lot about heroin, let alone its types) as they need to be water soluble to absorb in the sinuses properly and work their way into the bloodstream.
And some drugs actually do need to be swallowed to be metabolized in tge liver or other organ and to transform into another chemical compound (like codeine metabolizes into morphine when ingested, afaik) to be effect-positive/psychoactive.
You got solid facts there.

Did I completely fuck up my vyvanse tolerance? I was taking 40mg in the morning 20mg a couple hours later and bits of like 2mg throughout the rest of the day. This was over a 12 hour period.
Total was usually 70mg a day.

>>82559987
NTA.
>Maybe I should just swallow 200mg of pills around half an hour before starting the coke
Wow, are you really ready to fuck tonight?
Or are you just preparing for a stimfapping session?
If the latter, coke is a shitty choice for stimfapping afaik, try speed or MDMA as molly worked for me fine without overheating and going soft as a result, and not sweating bullets.
If it's the former, goodluck catching some tail; or you can also have a gf who is dtf on coke tonight, idk.
Also, why use coke as your drug of choice? It's very short-lasting (heard about 15mins a high) and easy to go through whole bags compulsively redosing until you run-out, left as sober as you were a few minutes ago and have just downed 100$ worth of coke in only one quick session. I mean, I heard good coke can be very fun in social situations and on tight schedules, when you've only 30mins for a break, but won't you get more bang-for-your-buck using another stim from the Amphetamines family that lasts longer (from 4-6 hours with normal speed to 6-8 hours on ER dex and also meth at 8-12 hours a high; which might be too long for some people) and has stronger effects like
Dextroamphetamine (for the euphoria)?
or plain Amphetamine (for functionality)?
or maybe Methamphetamine (for focus and body rush as well as some mild euphoria)?
or even MDMA (for social situations and avoiding ED)?
What makes coke apeal to you, specifically?
The euphoria?
The status symbolism?
The socialibility?
The feeling of being the king of the world?
The stimulation?
Cause all of those except for the status can be achieved with Amphetamines for cheaper and longer.
Is it that you're looking for a short-lasting high in the first place for functionality on the long-term? like being aware at the club and such?
Coke-fiends baffle me to no-end. It's litteraly a money-sink that lasts as long as a smoked DMT trip, hard to get uncut with fillers (at least in the USA afaik) and is bad for your nose, to boot.
Sry4longpost :p.

>>82562812
I don't get it, isn't THC-A non-psychoactive at all and needs to be decarboxylated with heat to become THC and have psychoactive effects?
Sorry, am a weed extracts/resins/waxs etc noob.

>>82563194
>1 gram of cannabis lasts me 5-7 days
Finally a normal weed user that is not brain-fried from high potency extracts/resins/waxs etc. Keep on keeping on, anon. Though a whole week for a single g is kinda stretching it, must be good quality weed. Also you must mix it with tobbaco or something.

>>82563377
NTA.
>have my chronic illness put me out of comission for me, and no place will hire me, so I rot in my childhood bedroom
Definitly go for disability if you can't work due to illness and/or no-one would hire you fr, anon. I got 100% inability to work and 50% disability which means I get the max amount of disability income (~1300$ a month with ~230$ from a dwelling subsidization organization initiative to help the disabled pay rent) and it covers rent for a small apartment of my own, food and some drugs, too. My life have improved marginally as a result of getting a regular income and moving-out of my childhood home. I go out more and even found a NEET shutin gf that's just like me who I visit once a week as an excuse to go out of the house, though public transport give me anxeity (I use light benzos for that). Do this and move-out, it's so freeing and private and I have to be motivated to clean the place and such so it pushes me to be more active insted of just rotting. Your life will be better guaranteed; all you need to pass the health-check committee is a note from a doctor (preferably a private doctor/psychiatrist) that says you are unable to work and finance yourself properly due to chronic illness and maybe throw-in a disorder/mental illness or two like sever social-anxeity and hard-depression or agoraphobia (since you're already self-isolating) and such; just don't mention suicide at all whatever you go with, even hard-depression, since it can end you up in the ward insted of getting disability and be marked as "dangerous factor" to yourself/others and that will fuck up your life fr. Also being in active treatment is a hugh plus to passing the committee and adds to your situation's believeability so get on active treatment for whatever you've got, seek professional, private help like said above (you don't have to actually take the meds if you don't want to, but they help me a ton) and have it documented to show at the committee.
Goodluck, anon.

>>82564404
>I'm so fucking sad that weed now just causes me to disassociate
TL;DR: weed kinda sucks now.
Same here. Why I stopped smoking after 8 months of heavy daily use cold-turkey and never looked back; and happier for it. It was fun at highschool when I didn't know any other drug and just daydreamed the high away in a corner alley watching the busy people walk by, but now I got specific tastes for certain experiences and know exactly what drug does what for me to get the desired experience. Speed/Meth, Benzos and LSD are my best friends when it comes to my tastes and preferences, and all of them have their own unique use and effects for specific cravings I have. Weed is a low-tier drug at this point that's not worth the money for the annoying side-effects vs. the positive effects (which are mostly gone at this point, anyway) and is the only psych that aggravates my schizophrania to an unmanageable degree; LSD does nothing to make it worse, oddly enough, and I can trip on 250ug easy with no psychosis whatsoever. So do the stims, btw, even though they are also known to aggravate psychotic symptoms are clean-highs ime. Maybe I'm just lucky or built different than other schizos, idk. These days I spend my money on the good stuff with predictible effects and consistant results that work without fail; not having to worry if my weed is too weak or strong is a blessing since I clear a bowl at one breath and it will hold the same amount no matter the potency and got into pretty bad places doing that. The dissosiation was the last straw as nothing felt real to me for the entire high and I'd get trapped inside my mind going into a psychotic episode hearing voices mocking me and having muscle spasms at the joints to the point that I thought I'd dislocate them and shit, which is not a recommended experience at all. For summery, when I abuse weed, weed abuses me back, hard.

>>82525417
Fucking love the stuff but damn is it easy to abuse. Its the best feeling in the world, better than heroin. When I started using it every month or so the comedowns were not great but I would have just 1 or 2 days where I felt tired and then all back to normal. About a year in I had a weekend where I probably took about 8 punishers total as well as candyflipping for most of it. For the next week I came very close to killing myself several times. After that I have had to do it less frequently and in smaller doses because I am fairly sure my serotonin receptors are completely fucked lol

>>82565610
>Normal
Yeah, because I'm an alcoholic looking to replace the pleasure without destroying my body. (1 liter of 40% vodka a night, every week).
>must be good quality weed. Also you must mix it with tobacco or something.
No. I literally just have no tolerance at all smoking/vaping anything.

>>82563377
You're self-destructive.
No matter how socially handicapped you are you could do remote desk work just fine. Even freelance would do, you could become an Upwork guy and do all kinds of stuff.

You just don't want to. I have no pity for you.
You are in a hell of your own making.

t. middle school dropout that ended up just fine because I worked what I could

>>82564441
>now I am a diagnosed schizophrenic
Being diagnosed with schizophrania was one of the best things to have happen to me since I could apply for disability and get the max amound of income from it (~1500$ with rent subsidies program for the disabled ~1300$ without it) and it covers a small apartment's rent, food and some drugs, too. All you need is to be on active treatment (which you are) and have a note from a psychiatrist (preferably a private one, it costs but will pay for itself in time) saying you can't finance yourself or work at all due to your illness. Showing the medical committee documented treatment plans and the note will guarantee you max disability and other rights as a disabled person. When you get out of the mental hospital, go for disability asap (just don't mention suicide no matter what as it marks you as a "dangerous factor" to yourself/others and'll send you to the ward repeatedly and often nonconsensually, trust me) and move-out to your own apt. My life got so much better having an apt and an income. It's unreal to think of all the suicidal thoughts I've had isolated in my room at home for 5 years; compared to now as I'm well medicated and haven't had a sui thought in the 3 years I set out on my own. Also I go out more and found a NEET shutin gf that's like me and we're happy.
>being medicated
Ime mental hospitals don't medicate you with the meds that're best for you. I'll again rec a private psychiatrist to find the right meds for you; with the least bad side effects and a strong AP efffect to make the psychosis more manageable.
>I'll never be the same
Being a schizo is hard for sure, but with the right kinda help it's liveable and comfortably so. Symptoms will be more manageable (or gone) in time as you learn to navigate intrusive thoughts and avoid bad thought patterns. I.E. I had mocking voices and I learned to deal with it with relative ease with time and exp; now they're mostly all quiet/gone! APs help a ton, too.
Goodluck!

>>82565554
When you apply heat to smoke/vape/bake then the decarboxylation process happens in the process of consuming it normally.