Thread 82801332

You cannot truly love anyone else until you love yourself. It is incredibly difficult but you can do it

>love
people talk about this shit all the time but rarely anybody can define what it is

>>82801332 (OP)
But the pajeet psychiatrist on youtube said that's wrong. That it's much harder to love yourself than to love other people, so you shouldn't give up on finding love just because you don't love yourself.

>>82801332 (OP)
You must love yourself based on you being competent and having confidence thereafter. If you fake it, you'll just be a narcissist.

>>82801364
I do not think healthy gamer gg is a good resource. I have spoken to practicing psychs with similar or stronger credentials and they attest to the fact that he oversimplifies many concepts and generalizes to get clicks. I am not qualified to say that all of his advice is incorrect but I would not treat his videos as advice from a medical professional

>>82801362
"love" here is figurative. "loving" yourself isn't romantic, it's having a strong appreciation for yourself.

>>82801376
I agree. Working on and bettering yourself is a key component in loving yourself

>>82801332 (OP)
Bullshit. Females should stop being so picky and should accept me for who I am even if I don't love myself.

>>82801406
I am being pedantic but I would not describe that as figurative. Love is a multi faceted concept and what I described is just one form of it

>>82801332 (OP)
>you don't deserve love if you don't love yourself
I don't want your love.

>>82801422
No anon because in that case you are incapable of truly loving them. I have made that mistake myself in the past and we both paid the price

>>82801406
>"love" here is figurative
I can't think of a single instance when it's not.
>it's having a strong appreciation for yourself
so just having a high self-esteem?

>>82801437
That is not what I said at all anon. Everyone deserves love. I am saying you are incapable of truly giving that toothers until you feel it for and toward yourself

>>82801431
Maybe you're right, love is a tangled mess of appreciation, attraction, and attachment. One cannot really be attracted or attached to themselves like family or a lover, so I just single out appreciation.

>>82801332 (OP)
This is a bullshit sentiment peddled by people who just don't like people with low self-esteem. You know what, OP, either you're a narcissist or you're fundamentally unlovable. How does that sound? And you're not worthy of love until you prove it.
What a crock of normalfag shit.

>>82801562
>peddled by people who just don't like people with low self-esteem
yeah, if someone says you should have high self-esteem, then he most probably don't want you to have low-self esteem
>either you're a narcissist or you're fundamentally unlovable.
What makes you say that? I'm not the OP by the way.

>>82801448
Wrong. The idea that people can't love other people unless they love themselves is hateful nonsense and bigoted against the depressed and other mentally ill who struggle to love themselves. It's just Just World Fallacy nonsense.

>>82801594
Because unless you truly have an unshakable love for yourself, you don't deserve love and are unlovable.
That's how fucking stupid that "You cannot truly love anyone else until you love yourself." sentiment is.

>>82801603
I hear your pain here anon. I can only tell you that is not what I intended whatsoever. I have lived through depression and poor self worth myself and have had relationships fail because I was dependent on my partner for my own happiness. I did not truly love her, I used her to feel better about myself. Inevitably I had to end things once we both realized we were using each other. I have not seen a relationship succeed between people who did not love themselves

>>82801637
>Because unless you truly have an unshakable love for yourself, you don't deserve love and are unlovable.
>You cannot truly love anyone else until you love yourself
These two are not really in contradiction.

>normalfag coming to peddle the same worthless advice
>wanting to say you're not worthy of love if you don't love yourself but not willing
>humblebragging all the while
Many MANY such cases

>>82801681
Good. Don't get in a relationship with anyone until you prove to me that you're a narcissist because you'd just be outsourcing your validation to someone else. Take your normalfag sentiments where you got in a relationship with someone you didn't love for validation and ended it somewhere else, loser.

>>82801684
>worthy
>love
>>82801695
>narcissist
so many meaningless words
anyway, are relationships only meant to be validation to each other?

>>82801744
>>so many meaningless words
Your words are the ones that are truly meaningless, oversimplified, damaging sentiment because you're a normalshit who got into a relationship when you were depwessseddd and using someone else for validation.
No one fucking cares, normalfag. Go paste your bullshit on reddit.

>>82801778
>Your words are the ones that are truly meaningless
I'm not the OP if that's what you are assuming in this weird backstory

>>82801332 (OP)
meme words. you ain't gonna love yourself if your genes are dogshit.

>>82801800
>that sheer lack of ego

>>82801798
>are relationships only meant to be validation to each other
No, although the normalfag sentiment boils down to that. Or, to expand upon that, normalfags believe that you can't love someone who is "secure", and are not worthy of love until you're 'secure", because they only connect with someone like that.
>worthy
>love
Yes, "unlovable."

>>82801832
>>No, although the normalfag sentiment boils down to that. Or, to expand upon that, normalfags believe that you can't love someone who is "secure", and are not worthy of love until you're 'secure", because they only connect with someone like that.
can't love someone who is "insecure", rather

>>82801332 (OP)
What do you actually mean by that? It's powerful and mysterious as a sentiment, but vague to the point of worthlessness. I love myself, but you might think I don't unless I have a clean room, trimmed nails, and steady job. Define your metrics more clearly for self love, cause it sort of just feels like you want to control behavior under the guise of a platitude, behavior you might not understand serves potentially a system of extraction and exploitation

OP, these words might work for those who still have some faith in themselves. this place is full of people that have had miserable lives (and some others who just like bitching about the smallest things and won't move a finger anyway).
your intentions are good, but you're giving a scarf to a starving person. and yes, you can love another person even if you don't love yourself. even worse; those who don't love themselves, find themselves loving any other person that gives them the slightest amount of affection. that's why people on this board get very attached to other people and end up suffocating them.
love is not only about receiving, it is about giving. and you can give things to others even if you don't give yourself anything.

LISTEN UP, LOSERS.

If you are incapable of hatred.
Then you are incapable of love.

If you do not hold in your soul, an overwhelming desire to inflict hell upon that which would harm what you cherish, then the word "love" is a meaningless lip-service that falls from your mouth

>>82801882
>If you do not hold in your soul, an overwhelming desire to inflict hell upon that which would harm what you cherish
hilarious things happen when it's the same person