Thread 83067399

What does /r9k/ want for christmas?

>>83067399 (OP)
A long peaceful sleep.

>>83067399 (OP)
a nice cassette deck that won't eat my tapes

>>83067399 (OP)
i want my crush :>

>>83067399 (OP)
I was going to make a thread about this. I waited a bit too long. But all I can think of right now is money, coffee and chocolate. I hope that's not asking for too much.

i want a new bigger telescope because ive outgrown my dobsonian

>>83067399 (OP)
i want a friend who i'll later on turn into a girlfriend, then into a wife
but let's start with a friend first

if not possible then i guess just a bunch of money to buy an apartment with

i'm more focused on my easter wishlist for 2026 because it has more options i need for college

>>83067399 (OP)
Somehwere to really rest

>>83067399 (OP)
A relationship, or at least friends.
But thats not gonna happen, so I'll just get drunk + high and enjoy the cozy holiday atmosphere like usual. Such is the life of a schizoid autist.

>>83067399 (OP)
feet in my mouth

>>83067399 (OP)
I wish that everyone from this board besides me gets a loving partner to spend life with

>>83067399 (OP)
a stable life :p

>>83067967
thats very noble anon. ill sacrifice my place so you can get one too

>>83067399 (OP)
I wish for death but I won't even get that. In fact, I'll probably just be here reading this garbage bait board waiting to die

>>83067399 (OP)
Expensive cologne.

>>83067991
Thanks friend. I don't actually want a partner or anything, so we can both be left out of that wish for the best

>>83067978
The monkey's paw curls, you awake in a stable. You are a horse. Your mind is still human. Your owner's name is Wilbur, you may speak but only to him. Also he's kind of a foolish klutz and there will be hijinks but you're still stuck as a horse forever.

>>83068192
mmm hay monch mmonch

>>83068240
>didn't recognize Mister Ed
Neptune pls do you even classic TV?

>>83068257
AAAAAAAAA i'm sorry i don't watch TV or know anything really!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am a humble horse.

to be enough

>>83067399 (OP)
im actually going to be dead via suicide before this christmas, weird to consider. Uncanny.

>>83068266
I don't either but when I was a kid I watched it a lot. Because we had the classics channel. I'm not that old. I'm a normal age. A very normal age with many years left to live.
>i am a humble horse.
A humble horse with a life in the stables but won't you get bored eating hay all the time?

>>83068274
Guess you could say you're gonna be... Dead by Christmas?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fYASGq5Aas
why you dyeing yourself?

I've given up on getting anything for Christmas. Money's pretty tight this year and I'm a grown-ass dude. It'd be dumb to expect anything. The only things I'd ask for would be the shit I asked for on my birthday, and I got exactly zero of those, and I feel like just resending the same list when I get asked what I want will be taken as a shitty gesture or offensive somehow. So nothing. I've reached the point of adulthood where I come to understand that people say "Nothing" when people ask them what they want because they juat don't see a point in announcing what they want.

>>83068277
erm.......... how old are you.............
>won't you get bored eating hay all the time?
crronch cronch monch slorp monch monch mocnh

>>83068282
i just hate life in general honestly, i have notes from years ago saying "i want to die" and the feeling just never stopped .

>>83068291
>erm.......... how old are you.............
shhh normal age it's ok it's not weird for me to be here talking to you whippersnappers
>crronch cronch monch slorp monch monch mocnh
hrmm kinda jealous that melon looks good wonder if I can horse around too

>>83068305
if you're like 50 or something i fuck with it
peepaw you are welcome here!!!!!!!!!!

>>83068292
Yeah I've had that shit too anon. Wanted to die from as young as I can remember. Used to pray to god please just fucking kill me in my sleep. But you know it just kind of went away one day. I don't know why really, but it could happen to you too. Sorry that's a really shit pep talk but you know, don't give up and all that jazz.

>>83068313
I have three teeth left and a long whispy white beard. I walk with a cane and my liver spots cover more than half my skin. I have one strand of hair on the tippity top of my head. It is 5 feet long. Oh I'm so old oh life is pain but I'll carry on. These little posts on 4chan keep me going. Here take a butterscotch I keep them in my pockets for reasons I have long since forgotten.

>>83068328
THANLK YOU PEEPAW I LOVE BUTTERSCOTCH OMNOMNOMNOM

>>83068337
Aha! I throw away my cane and rip off the bald cap and meticulously remove each liver spot sticker I placed, this takes a while. The beard stays, it's real. I stand to my full height and Aha! again at you. It wasn't butterscotch! It was candy that makes you normal! No longer do you get to be a cool mentally ill person tripfriending on 4chan! No no, now you have to live a boring normie life and do boring normie things like taxes and complaining about price of gas on Twitter! You fool, you absolute fool you.

>>83067399 (OP)
a job, i guess

Damn I think that candy actually worked I gotta patent that shit it's better than prozac

>>83067399 (OP)
A mini lathe

>>83067399 (OP)
im going to buy about $500 worth of french language baking books for myself after which i will ascend to pastry godhood and mog all of /ck/ for eternity

>>83067399 (OP)
I want to be reborn into a rich family in a first world country

>>83067399 (OP)
My family alive again.
Or a barren foid who I can drop loads into every day.