I didn’t know I was asexual. I just knew I wasn’t into sex. It didn’t do anything for me. Sometimes I joked about it with friends, but I never felt actual curiosity or desire. For a while I thought I was broken. Because everything around you makes you think you should feel something desire, heat, lust. And if you don’t, you’re the weird one.
Then I found the word asexual, and suddenly things made sense.
But saying it out loud? That’s when the real shit started.
I told a “friend” I thought I was ace. She looked at me with disgust and said: “No, of course you’re not.” Like she knew me better than I knew myself.
Another time, a group of girls I barely talked to were surprised when I said I was a virgin. One of them (the arrogant one, always judging) said: “I don’t like to judge, but I did think you weren’t a virgin.”
Why? Because I made sex jokes with someone they knew. So apparently joking about something means you’re into it now. Wild logic.
And yeah, I once gave a guy a chance. I told him I was ace, that I just wanted to explore slowly, with patience. On day two, not even dating officially, he grabbed my boob without permission and in front of people. I was uncomfortable. He said: “What? That’s normal.”
When I ended things, he played the victim: “It’s not my fault you don’t love me the way I am.”
Dude, I asked for respect and patience, not a pity party and non-consensual touching.
People act like being asexual is a defect. Like you need a reason, a trauma, a diagnosis to not be into sex.
But I’m not traumatized. I’m not broken. I’m just not wired like you. And that’s okay.

If you’ve been through similar bullshit — if people made you feel broken for not being horny 24/7 — tell your story too.
Not for pity. Just so they stop pretending they “didn’t know” this was real. :)