https://x.com/wind3n1/status/1933219871765991669

Black Box Transcript – Final Minutes of Flight 404

> Captain (Mr. Ramesh): “I am telling you, sir, apply fresh cow poo to forehead and the joints, pulls out body heat. Very cooling. Natural remedy.”

First Officer (Mr. Suresh): “Yes yes Rameshji. You told before. But why you keeping actual poo in a bowl near the cockpit fan? Whole plane is smell as cow asshole.”

Ramesh: “That is the point, dear! It is cleansing. Pure cow dung has antibacterial properties. This is spiritual ventilation.”

[Altitude warning begins: “Pull up. Pull up.” — ignored.]

Suresh: “Saar, with all due respect, passengers are complaining. One childs are crying.”

Ramesh: “Let them cry. One hour in poo aroma and their anxiety will go down 40 percent according to latest university science.”

Suresh: “Saaar, we are descending rapidly?”

Ramesh: “You worry too much. Relax breathe in deeply dear. Even NASA is now researching cow poop as stress reliever. Very grounding.”

Suresh: “Saar, yes... I suppose I agree saar."

[Final words before impact:]

Ramesh: "Feel how smooth the air is. The poo is working.”


[Impact. Recording ends.]