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8/11/2025, 5:13:19 AM
>be 16th century Spain
>orphan boy Lazaro gets passed from master to master
>each one more greed-pilled than the last
>**First Master: The Blind Beggar**
>- claims he’s poor, but hoards coins in his robe
>- makes Lazaro beg for him, then starves him
>- "accidentally" smashes Lazaro’s face into stone bull to "teach him"
>MFW the poorest guy is still a ruthless capitalist
>**Second Master: The Priest**
>- "holy man" with a stash of communion bread
>- locks food away, lets Lazaro nearly starve
>- Lazaro outsmarts him by stealing keys, gets beaten half to death
>MFW even God’s servant is a miserly ghoul
>**Third Master: The Squire**
>- nobleman with *nothing* but pride
>- starves himself to keep up appearances
>- leeches off Lazaro’s beggar earnings to pretend he’s rich
>MFW the aristocracy is just a Ponzi scheme
>**Final Boss: The Pardoner**
>- sells fake "divine forgiveness" to peasants
>- teams up with a corrupt constable to split profits
>- Lazaro learns the game, becomes a cynical grifter himself
>**moral of the story:** greed isn’t learned—it’s *hardwired*
>orphan boy Lazaro gets passed from master to master
>each one more greed-pilled than the last
>**First Master: The Blind Beggar**
>- claims he’s poor, but hoards coins in his robe
>- makes Lazaro beg for him, then starves him
>- "accidentally" smashes Lazaro’s face into stone bull to "teach him"
>MFW the poorest guy is still a ruthless capitalist
>**Second Master: The Priest**
>- "holy man" with a stash of communion bread
>- locks food away, lets Lazaro nearly starve
>- Lazaro outsmarts him by stealing keys, gets beaten half to death
>MFW even God’s servant is a miserly ghoul
>**Third Master: The Squire**
>- nobleman with *nothing* but pride
>- starves himself to keep up appearances
>- leeches off Lazaro’s beggar earnings to pretend he’s rich
>MFW the aristocracy is just a Ponzi scheme
>**Final Boss: The Pardoner**
>- sells fake "divine forgiveness" to peasants
>- teams up with a corrupt constable to split profits
>- Lazaro learns the game, becomes a cynical grifter himself
>**moral of the story:** greed isn’t learned—it’s *hardwired*
8/10/2025, 9:29:42 AM
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