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6/17/2025, 10:51:04 AM
>>95888772
"Okay so you know Prometheus, the movie? So there's this race of giants with butts where their dicks should be and dick-shaped spacecraft, and the Easter Bunny is actually an alien that kills planetary populations by using pheromones to make them literally go fuck themselves to death (and also super strength, claws etc), and the giants worship the bunny while the Space Christians oppose it because-"
"OH GOD STOP STOP NO NO NO" screamed Morty. "N-no, that's stupid! I'M STUPID for wanting to know this! Oh god, Rick was right! Sometimes you just have to NOT think about shit like this! Just skip ahead to what you did to my dad!"
"That? Well, anyone who kills the Easter Bunny becomes the Easter Bunny through some unknown mechanism but fortunately whatever medium does this can be interfered with high energy beams and a suitable, suspiciously Easter Egg-like containment unit so I just applied those principles, modified them into cellular enzymes, and basically sealed the Easter Bunny inside your dad indefinitely"
He slumped in his chair. "Well um, damn. T-that almost makes sense. Thanks Anon..."
"Not a problem. Your existence on this plane is brief, Morty. Try to focus on what's important" I said, leaving again.
Later, Morty looked at his dad dejectedly packing up all the easter decorations, and felt bad for him. Suddenly he realised I'd slipped him the Meaning of Easter injector while he wasn't looking. He spent the night studying it's designs, ran some calculations and decoded which enzymes could be decoded to provide increased sex drive/appeal without giant rabbit transformation. Then he surreptitiously hacked into the femtomachines. That night, Jerry and Beth had a very, very pleasant surprise that put Beth in an incredibly happy mood and made Jerry feel slightly less worthless for the rest of his life.
Meanwhile, I was conquering a universe whose earth was run by lasagna people.
3/3
"Okay so you know Prometheus, the movie? So there's this race of giants with butts where their dicks should be and dick-shaped spacecraft, and the Easter Bunny is actually an alien that kills planetary populations by using pheromones to make them literally go fuck themselves to death (and also super strength, claws etc), and the giants worship the bunny while the Space Christians oppose it because-"
"OH GOD STOP STOP NO NO NO" screamed Morty. "N-no, that's stupid! I'M STUPID for wanting to know this! Oh god, Rick was right! Sometimes you just have to NOT think about shit like this! Just skip ahead to what you did to my dad!"
"That? Well, anyone who kills the Easter Bunny becomes the Easter Bunny through some unknown mechanism but fortunately whatever medium does this can be interfered with high energy beams and a suitable, suspiciously Easter Egg-like containment unit so I just applied those principles, modified them into cellular enzymes, and basically sealed the Easter Bunny inside your dad indefinitely"
He slumped in his chair. "Well um, damn. T-that almost makes sense. Thanks Anon..."
"Not a problem. Your existence on this plane is brief, Morty. Try to focus on what's important" I said, leaving again.
Later, Morty looked at his dad dejectedly packing up all the easter decorations, and felt bad for him. Suddenly he realised I'd slipped him the Meaning of Easter injector while he wasn't looking. He spent the night studying it's designs, ran some calculations and decoded which enzymes could be decoded to provide increased sex drive/appeal without giant rabbit transformation. Then he surreptitiously hacked into the femtomachines. That night, Jerry and Beth had a very, very pleasant surprise that put Beth in an incredibly happy mood and made Jerry feel slightly less worthless for the rest of his life.
Meanwhile, I was conquering a universe whose earth was run by lasagna people.
3/3
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