>get an idea
>set a deadline
>try to draw
>it doesn't come out right
>procrastinate until the last day
>spend the whole day polishing a turd
>it looks bad and the original idea is gone and the moment is lost
>realize that time and effort is wasted
>repeat
the only time I can draw effortlessly is when I don't care about the final state of the thing I'm drawing so I can't even do practice during my artblock
why am I like this and how do I fix it