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Anonymous /adv/33204558#33205759
6/12/2025, 2:01:57 AM
With the James Bond series looking at a reboot I think that a Femcel villainess would be the way to go to stay modern. I present to you my idea, "For Your Onlyfans Only"
>Mr. Bond, your target is the notorious online content creator Femme LeCel, leader of the "Women Forever" movement.
>She's notorious for her hackof the video game Animal Crossing, her organization's piracy of ships containing Sanrio merchandise, and her X account, screencaps are used as ragebait throughout the internet
>Driven mad by rejection from men far beyond her league, she's vowed revenge on mankind unless she can get a boyfriend who is over six feet and makes at least six figures per year
>don't get excited 007, you're only 5' 10"
>Cue Bond's infiltration of LeCel's anime convention private room
>he gets caught after being seduced by a famous anime dub actress named Voice Actor Gina, abbreviated to VA Gina.
>"Bond, VA Gina has just announced an Onlyfans"
>"Advertisements indicate a lesbian kiss, over 50 million men have already signed up"
>Femme LeCel chuckles as she watches Bond being tortured by the Yaoi fanfic reading
>"You See Mr. Bond, I wanted an Onlyfans too, but I only got two subscribers, one of them was that lesbian twat Moneypenny"
>"I've hacked the Onlyfans server, and when VA Gina uploads her first video at 6:00 PM EST my virus will go out, causing every laptop and phone in the USA to explode, neutering every man who subscribed to her!"
>"Yes I'm the woman she kisses, not because I like it gawd it's totally just to kill you moids"
>LeCel leaves Bond to die of cringe at the fanfic reading, but he escapes by giving positive reviews
>Bond fights his way to the server including a very sexy fight with VA Gina
>LeCel laughs and says he'll never guess the deactivation code
>Bond enters in the discount code from her onlyfans
>"NO! How did you know!?"
>"Who did you think your other subscriber was?"
>credits song "FEMME LE CEL! Her pussy is cold as death, and doritos taint her breath