You sound like me ( albeit I'm FtM ). People are all just numbers, a fun little game to play, I enjoy treating people like individual little sims of human interaction for psychological experimentation and personal entertainment. I'll spend days researching meticulously documenting all sorts of peoples personalities, mimicking their interests, what they don't like, their deeply held values and principles, what they're living for, their vocabulary and manner of speech, the subtle ways they interact they themselves aren't even aware of, their sexual desires and what they yearn for others can't give them. I'll read books, wikis and watch autistic youtube documentaries to seem keen on niche subjects. I keep them addicted to me but always at a distance, never chatting too much, always hungry for more carefully manipulating and warping their mind. I have dozens of different ''characters'' I'll play, sometimes juxtaposed alts purposely antagonizing the person I'm having a pleasant convo with on the other end, but they'll never know while I'm giving them shoulder comfort for their mental breakdown I caused, further pulling them deeper into my little web making them reliant on me. Sometimes they'll tell me things like ''oh my dog got ran over I'm so sad'' and all I can think is if one lived close enough that could be a useful means of manipulating their emotions. I strategically pIant ideas into people's heads for months, sometimes years, isolating them from people I've convinced are no good until I'm bored and go full scorched earth leaving them alone on an edge as I put on a new mask, the only evidence of their existence in my mind - a subject number, examination and amusing result.