I would like some feedback from the socially inept (Real losers only). I'm trying to express this in the shortest form I can.
I am a husk at my job. My coworkers press me about my personal life more than anyone else specifically because of how private and quiet and non social I am. It makes me angry and uncomfortable, which I think is childish. And, when I finally do open up, it's autistic as fuck. I say the wrong things to the wrong people. It's almost out of laziness, because it would be far smarter to just continue to be quiet. I feel like a reptile, but again I am more easily compared to a child. I do not know how to be normal, and I feel very, very, very stupid for being so angry over the fact that I am, in fact, expected to satiate people's emotions and establish human connection with strangers at a job where I must practice " Customer Service "
Being to the point, treating the transactionary relationship EXACTLY as it is, and nothing more, is sovlless behavior. I know I don't have to suck their dicks. But saying "Hello" (Or heaven forbid "How are you) instead of "What can I get you" is the same thing to me. I feel like a heartless person. I am filled with so much hatred, and foundationally I am very immature, so I'm not even a stone cold austin, this is just the behavior of a brat. ie, "I refuse to be human, I refuse to see you as a human, unless I have many reasons to trust you"
What's my diagnosis. Is there a cure that is not taking medication and pretending to be someone else for 8 hours and never really, truly feel anything.

Very rusty drawing I've only drawn a handful of times across several months