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6/18/2025, 7:27:38 PM
>>24474141
Those purposeful endeavors of your sound more like dizzy actions with the objective of numbing unnecessary suffering / useless boredom, than oriented expressions of oneself towards what you actually care about and would make your life better. There must be synergy between being, doing and becoming when giving a shot at understanding true purpose.
Just as “nothing can’t come out of something” Effort and energy always lead to a result of proportional impact even if our senses can’t yet fully grasp it. Who knows, maybe they haven’t compounded yet, time is tricky when energy investment/dissipation is in play.
Anxiety as the dizziness of freedom may be functioning as a paralyzing mechanism when you feel directionless. My guess is that you have your Fears in front instead of behind you, pushing you away from an even greater catastrophe beyond disheartened, hopeless emptiness. Emptiness at least is a known friend, comfortable and sometimes predictable. Feeling it has a gain of some sort. Don’t run from it though, negating it also neglects a core aspect of your existence. We can never get anywhere desirable by running from ourselves. Stay with it for a while, let the Greyness settle in and be still, or rather, flow with it. Not long after an all-encompassing boredom arises you’ll know what you care about enough to pursue despite societal pressures. Then you start dancing with the Chaos that will emerge of such joyous enterprise.
Those purposeful endeavors of your sound more like dizzy actions with the objective of numbing unnecessary suffering / useless boredom, than oriented expressions of oneself towards what you actually care about and would make your life better. There must be synergy between being, doing and becoming when giving a shot at understanding true purpose.
Just as “nothing can’t come out of something” Effort and energy always lead to a result of proportional impact even if our senses can’t yet fully grasp it. Who knows, maybe they haven’t compounded yet, time is tricky when energy investment/dissipation is in play.
Anxiety as the dizziness of freedom may be functioning as a paralyzing mechanism when you feel directionless. My guess is that you have your Fears in front instead of behind you, pushing you away from an even greater catastrophe beyond disheartened, hopeless emptiness. Emptiness at least is a known friend, comfortable and sometimes predictable. Feeling it has a gain of some sort. Don’t run from it though, negating it also neglects a core aspect of your existence. We can never get anywhere desirable by running from ourselves. Stay with it for a while, let the Greyness settle in and be still, or rather, flow with it. Not long after an all-encompassing boredom arises you’ll know what you care about enough to pursue despite societal pressures. Then you start dancing with the Chaos that will emerge of such joyous enterprise.
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