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7/8/2025, 5:59:22 AM
>>40316485
okay, so, umm, are you in a position to provide spiritual guidance, or are you just pointing out that trannies are historically considered spritual? i'm asking because im genuinely looking for help, im having a crisis of faith, but in the opposite way. ive been an athiest all my life, and i consider religions to be nothing more than stories made up by early humans to explain the unexplainable or to cope with the unrelenting despair that is the human condition. i am deeply depressed, i have been since i was able to form conscious thoughts, i immediately become aware of my mortality and the futlity of all actions when ultimately it only leads to death, and that the world is born from chaos with no direction, and people are mindlessly scrambling for control while the decay of time eats away at their flesh. this was a lot for a 5 year old to deal with, but i think it says a lot about the world we live in, if a 5 year old can figure it out in an instant and see the end of time, and know that the journey there is not worth it. however, and here's the real kick in the teeth, lately i've been feeling a sense of spirituality, maybe even belief in a god, or some kind of higher power. its organic, little things here and there (like this thread), adding up to a sense of something beyond myself, beyond science, and beyond death. my first reaction is that im coping, my fear of death is making itself known again and im trying to give myself hope in an otherwise hopeless world. but, well, what if im wrong? the majority of people in the world are religous, so what if that means something, what if im missing out? i do feel that as a trans woman, i have an open mind, perhaps even an affinity for something spiritual, and maybe god or this higher power has plans for me. im just so scared, absolutely terrified, i dont want to waste my life and live in misery, i really dont want to die, and i really don't know what to believe anymore. i am completely adrift in this raging sea.
okay, so, umm, are you in a position to provide spiritual guidance, or are you just pointing out that trannies are historically considered spritual? i'm asking because im genuinely looking for help, im having a crisis of faith, but in the opposite way. ive been an athiest all my life, and i consider religions to be nothing more than stories made up by early humans to explain the unexplainable or to cope with the unrelenting despair that is the human condition. i am deeply depressed, i have been since i was able to form conscious thoughts, i immediately become aware of my mortality and the futlity of all actions when ultimately it only leads to death, and that the world is born from chaos with no direction, and people are mindlessly scrambling for control while the decay of time eats away at their flesh. this was a lot for a 5 year old to deal with, but i think it says a lot about the world we live in, if a 5 year old can figure it out in an instant and see the end of time, and know that the journey there is not worth it. however, and here's the real kick in the teeth, lately i've been feeling a sense of spirituality, maybe even belief in a god, or some kind of higher power. its organic, little things here and there (like this thread), adding up to a sense of something beyond myself, beyond science, and beyond death. my first reaction is that im coping, my fear of death is making itself known again and im trying to give myself hope in an otherwise hopeless world. but, well, what if im wrong? the majority of people in the world are religous, so what if that means something, what if im missing out? i do feel that as a trans woman, i have an open mind, perhaps even an affinity for something spiritual, and maybe god or this higher power has plans for me. im just so scared, absolutely terrified, i dont want to waste my life and live in misery, i really dont want to die, and i really don't know what to believe anymore. i am completely adrift in this raging sea.
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