Came to this thread to admit that I am not feeling great and I feel like I just had a massive relapse in any progress I might have made.

I was kind of middling this week, wasn't doing the chores as much as I should have, tried to celebrate my birthday with my friends but most of them cancelled on the plans we made and that really hurt.
I tried to power through it but then the newest Budget Bill in the US got passed and just needs to be signed and I am genuinely doomspiralling. I feel like every time I try to better myself the universe punishes me and makes things worse. It doesn't matter how I try to fix myself or improve my life, me getting a job? Great! This bill gives the President an atrocious amount of power and he and his allies talk about how trans people like me are disgusting and deserve prison. My fears from a few months back feel like they're coming true.

I can't stop checking twitter to see if there's something that can be done, but there's not, and it just feels like my brain is boiling and I'm a useless idiot who ruins the universe by trying to claw my way into being a person.

I told myself that no matter what happens, I want to live, I want to survive with my husband, but fuck, I'm scared and struggling to see a point.