>>40594203
I'm afraid of death, or rather of the extinction of consciousness and the Void, then I had the thought that it couldn't be so bad because my personality only remotely resembles that of the little boy I once was, so he probably died on the way. But when I awoke the suppressed memories, I suddenly had feelings again that I hadn't had for decades, and I knew he was still inside me. It was also a life changing and touching experience to look for something inside without knowing what it was and actually find it and now I know he's not dead and i'm not going to disappear so lightly either.

My childhood trauma comes from not feeling normal and hiding my quirks even from myself, I feel so sorry for my inner child because he felt so lonely and like an alien and I just want to hug him.
These malicious being/thoughts be it supernatural or does it come from inside me does not matter, I have to work for myself whether a candle, a ritual or a prayer is probably less important than the intention.
I will also check out his videos, there is still so much to learn and it's just fascinating to know that the knowledge is already inside me and it really touched me that your post intersects with my findings i made.