>>81744656
the only genuine friend i used to have was someone i met from this board around 7 years ago. it was an online friend. just like me, she was a hikkineet who struggled with anxiety, loneliness and hopelessness, and it was the first time in my life i'd ever met someone dealing with the same struggles as me. it made me feel really happy and hopeful because it felt like i wasn't all alone in the world anymore. we were always trying to motivate each other and send positivity each other's way to try and improve our lives and get out of this lonely rut we were both stuck in.

eventually, we both built up our confidence enough to try and make friends on twitter so we started hanging out in all sorts of otaku centric spaces. and within like a week, she met this guy who flew her out to LA and took her to anime cons and bought her model kits and all sorts of things. the moment that happened, she blocked me everywhere and hasn't said a word to me since. i could be dead for all she cares.

it's hard not to be jaded on people when someone you've been close with for 7+ years will just discard you overnight like it's nothing. it feels hopeless to try and form a genuine bond with anyone, because this scenario will just repeat over and over and over.

i just don't know what to do anymore. i'm so done with everything. i just wanna die and be done with it all. i'm really at my limit