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7/2/2025, 2:51:26 PM
>be american
>wake up at 4am to get drive to work
>eat sugar pellet and UHT milk soup for breakfast
>chug a 32oz glass of High Fructose Corn syrup enriched Orange Drink
>doesn't contain enough orange to be called juice
>my pupils dilate as the glucose tears through my lymphatic system
>my hands start throbbing as cold sweats run down my back
>decide to hit up starbucks on the way to work to calm my nerves
>notice my coworker drinking a clear, non-carbonated beverage
>"Hey, what's that, the new crystal pepsi?"
>coworker tells me it's just water, it comes out of the faucet by the sink
>typical onions beta, drinking government feminising poison
>coworker mentions he's on a new diet where he's skipping breakfast
>take a big sip from my 48oz double shot caramel frappecino with extra cream
>"You can't skip breakfast, its the most important meal of the day"
>wake up at 4am to get drive to work
>eat sugar pellet and UHT milk soup for breakfast
>chug a 32oz glass of High Fructose Corn syrup enriched Orange Drink
>doesn't contain enough orange to be called juice
>my pupils dilate as the glucose tears through my lymphatic system
>my hands start throbbing as cold sweats run down my back
>decide to hit up starbucks on the way to work to calm my nerves
>notice my coworker drinking a clear, non-carbonated beverage
>"Hey, what's that, the new crystal pepsi?"
>coworker tells me it's just water, it comes out of the faucet by the sink
>typical onions beta, drinking government feminising poison
>coworker mentions he's on a new diet where he's skipping breakfast
>take a big sip from my 48oz double shot caramel frappecino with extra cream
>"You can't skip breakfast, its the most important meal of the day"
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