>>33361154
i think my central problem is that i was raised to be very entitled and disdainful towards people i deemed "average", but now i realized i was average all along and i can't handle that worldview being turned against me, and at the same time it seems too correct for me to completely discard, so instead i'm on an endless, futile quest for self improvement

back to sex. even ugly people understand beauty. no ugly person thinks he or she is beautiful. "standards" don't actually exist. an ugly person is still more attracted to beautiful people than ugly people. the problem is of what can be realistically obtained, not of genuine desire. seeing fat to skinnyfat males and gross tattooed women with potato faces having sex at best fills me with fascination of watching zoo animals mate, and at worst with visceral disgust.