>>714629017
>The Orc city smoldered, burned down in the wake of battle.
Why would it just be called 'Orc city' instead of having an actual name? It's just lazy. You don't need to say 'burned' if you already said 'smoldered.'
>The ground soaked in a knuckle's depth of blood and ash.
Knuckle's depth? Who says that? It's oddly specific, which implies that it should be taken literally. However, it doesn't make sense if you take it literally since that would mean the ground of a city would be covered in like an inch of blood
>The savage cries of its defenders now silent and still as its ruin was overseen by the architect of its very destruction
You don't need to say 'silent' and 'still'. 'Silent' already covers it, 'Still' is repetitive, like his first sentence. And why do you need to say that it was overseen by the architect who destroyed it? Of course it was. Whoever destroyed the city is the 'architect of destruction' by default lol
>The Orc wars were finally over.
Just lazy and boring exposition.
>"There is nothing more reviled than the orc," said the elvish king.
This is probably the least bad sentence, but it's still pretty bad. Imagine if after a war a leader just randomly said "Yeah I hate those guys." Imagine of Aragorn had just randomly said this after winning the last big battle