Prove to me that Varg was ever completely wrong

I'm stuck between getting a treadmill, a rowing machine, or a boxing bag. All three have major advantages, I mostly want it for cardio, everything else is bonus. I was almost going to get an air bike, but realised I'll likely never need to ride fast irl. What would you choose? Or something else completely?

Disgusting parody of human life. Wherever you hide the earth itself will protest your presence to the aryan sword nearby.
>I am the lorax
>please kill this kike cunt that is hiding behind me and I will give you bountiful fruit.

Your days are numbered fuckers.