>>512423498
this first one might be hard to tell via text instead of vocally
>1.
What do you call someone from Nigeria? - A Nigerian.
What do you call someone from Niger? - A NIJJER! (because Niger is pronounced "ni-jer")

>2.
Three Jews find a magical lamp and rub it, a genie pops out of the lamp and says he will grant 3 wishes, but only one each to the 3 Jews.
The Jews discuss for a moment and agree that what they wish for will be shared and benefit all three of them.
The first Jew says, "I wish for 3 million dollars!" - With a nod and snap of the finger, the genie says "Your wish is granted."
The second Jew says to the first Jew "Hey that's not nearly enough! Genie, I wish for 3 billion dollars!" - With a nod and snap of the finger, the genie says "Your wish is granted."
The genie says to the third Jew, "I suppose you wish for 3 trillion dollars?"
"No." said the third Jew, "Instead, I wish for antisemitism to end!" - With a nod and snap of the finger, the genie says "Your wish is granted."
The 3 Jews disappear.