>>33386090
i'm already post humbling. that's the problem. when people are "nice" to me i know it is nothing more than politeness because they are uncomfortable with my socially inappropriate behaviors and obliviousness. when i start to have fun i realize i'm becoming complacent, snapping me out of the delusion. getting humbled didn't make me more empathetic towards the average person, relating to their struggles that i share. instead, for me, the easier choice was to just start hating myself too because i was trash like them.