When did things go wrong for you? Is there anything you could have realistically done to change the outcome of things?

>22
>dysfunctional family of 6
>h ave not had a christmas together since 2017
>everyone in family hates each other
>2 months ago, older brother tried to kill himself[failed]
why the fuck did things have to go the way they did? I wish everything was better. why am i like this