To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Helldivers 2. The strategy is incredibly nuanced, and without a firm grasp of tactical squad-based combat and Super Earth doctrine, most of the gameplay mechanics will go over a typical player’s head. There’s also the satirical authoritarianism of the Super Earth government, which is subtly woven into the game’s narrative—its political commentary draws heavily from mid-20th-century propaganda and Orwellian dystopias.

True Helldivers understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depth of dropping an Eagle 500 on their squad mid-extraction, to realize it’s not just “friendly fire”—it’s a critique of the cost of liberty. As a consequence, people who say Helldivers 2 is “just another co-op shooter” are truly idiots—they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the existential brilliance of a well-timed “FOR DEMOCRACY” war cry as you’re torn apart by Automatons.

I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those casuals getting auto-kicked for not bringing a resupply stratagem, scratching their heads in confusion as Super Earth’s divine will unfolds in orbital bombardments. What fools… how I pity them.

And yes, by the way, I do have a cape with the Super Earth emblem on it. And no, you may not touch it. It’s for loyal citizens only—and even then, they have to have completed at least three major orders and carried their team in Helldive difficulty. Nothing personnel, citizen.