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7/9/2025, 3:58:57 PM
6/25/2025, 6:39:25 PM
>>279966348
>>279975500
It's not an issue when done sparingly and early in the story to establish the fact, the problem is how painfully repetitive it gets when the girls continue to turn random heads everywhere they go. It's the same with the blunt "but we're FAMILY" or "she's my SISTER" dialogue. I know these girls are attractive and I know they are family, you already told me, I don't need to be reminded with exposition about it every 5 minutes.
The scenario is great, just remove unnecessary stuff treating the audience like we're retarded and there would be instant improvement.
>>279975500
It's not an issue when done sparingly and early in the story to establish the fact, the problem is how painfully repetitive it gets when the girls continue to turn random heads everywhere they go. It's the same with the blunt "but we're FAMILY" or "she's my SISTER" dialogue. I know these girls are attractive and I know they are family, you already told me, I don't need to be reminded with exposition about it every 5 minutes.
The scenario is great, just remove unnecessary stuff treating the audience like we're retarded and there would be instant improvement.
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