Pepe’s Virgin Ballad (Plus a Pound or Two)

Pepe plods on, a hefty green lump,
No charm, no luck—just a belly that’s plump.
Croaks his woes from his lonely pad,
Dreaming of love that he’s never had.

Not just shy, but round and slow,
A meme-weight champ with nowhere to go.
Swipe left, swipe right, they all just scoff,
Poor Pepe’s stuck in the friend zone, way off.

So here’s to the frog, fat, virgin, and blue—
A sad, chunky symbol of internet rue !