>>40538624
I'm struggling immensely with productivity.
It feels like my life is such a wreck. I know what I need to do to fix it (finish my creative projects, be proactive on my social medias for them, learn marketing) but it feels like my emotional turmoil keeps me in a loop of wasting all of my days away.
I've recently entered into a new relationship with someone (sorta, we haven't met irl yet but we will this summer) who graduated with a prestigious degree and I feel like I need to get it together to be worthy of him. Legit feels like this guy is my soulmate.
I hate myself a lot for my childhood, even though it wasn't my fault. I feel like trash because I didn't finish a degree due to being homeless. I feel like I'm a broken toy and the only way a guy will want me is by taking pity on me, even though he assures me that he doesn't.
It's like I can't stop beating myself up. It's like my family taught me to reject myself, too. I'm all alone in this world and poor. I need to get it together for my career to make money and feel worthy of him.
I'm beautiful. I know this. But on the inside, I'm still the same ugly scared child I was twenty years ago. Readings from other anons tell me of a spirit guardian who heals me a lot, who looks after me, who is doing his best to guide me towards success.
What do I need to be told the most right now, anon? According to your cards?
Thanks in advance if you can get to me.