The worst part about life is knowing that you have nobody but yourself to blame for why your life is shit. The kicker is if you're a mentally ill retard and you have an unreasonable amount of self loathing, you see the worth in doing any activities that aren't instant dopamine rewards. I know I'd be happier if I moved out. I know I should try to find better employment. I have close to a dozen projects I'd like to continue. But I'm not going to because I have to rely on the one person I hate more than anything to take those steps.