Today I got a letter. From a notary. My father is dead. He died last month. To say that we hadn't been close would be an understatement. Last time I'd seen him was 14 years ago. He died at the age of 60. I am 26. I do no yet know the cause of his death. Suicide or DUI are my best guesses.
He was a violent drunk but I never saw much if any of this side of his, as my mother divorced him early. Saw him only a couple times after, before he cut all contact with me.
I expected for this moment to happen. I didn't see myself ever seeing him in person again before his death. And I expected myself to not know what to feel. And I don't.
Puts things into perspective, had I been close to him I'd be howling right now. Instead, when I read the letter, I was like "No way, it has actually happened."
God have mercy on his soul, he's going to need it.