>>40675361
We lived in a shitty apartment. My music was important to me. So I got a regular 9-5 but that wasn’t good enough for her. She wanted me around more often. I didn’t make enough money at first. Then we got a better place after the abortion. I felt the baby die man. I’ll never forget that feeling. It fucking destroyed me. I went from being the happiest man alive to this shitty disgusting ball of sadness and anger. If I could go back in time and ask her if I took the baby’s place and died myself, would she keep it? And if she said yes, I would eat a bullet on the spot. But no matter what, I still love her with every fiber of my being. I have to throw my arms down and physically restrain my arms just to let go so I can play my music. Trust me, the love I have for her is very real. I wish I could just die most days, just so I wouldn’t have to feel this agony.

I noticed something when trying to get back with my ex. The universe sends these hot as fuck women my way. I feel like it’s a test. Like if I fuck any of these bitches it’ll be over forever. I just had a 10/10 female ring my doorbell in nothing but a bikini. Imma hold out for my ex. I just love her and I can’t see myself with anybody else. She’s the mother of my children. I can’t just take just anyone who rings my doorbell. Not even for casual sex. I love her so much. I need to be with my family. I accept nothing else. Fuck that was hard to say no to though.