>>40320376
perhaps i should have maybe clarified, when i say "spiritual" i mean a belief in god, in the same way these historical trannies from op were priestesses for religions that believed in god, and being trans made them more spiritual in service of said god. im looking for answers, not just about myself, but the entire universe and its creation, its purpose (if there is any), and most importantly perhaps, im looking for hope to continue living so i can maybe achieve some happiness before i ultimately accept death and move on, best case scenario. just as an example, lets take the bible, even if you don't believe in its theories, it is at the very least a historical document, compiled by different authors over many years, as far back as recorded history, more or less. the bible and its teachings, are followed, studied and debated by millions of people daily. im not looking for stories or blind faith, i don't want social acceptance or a cult, i don't want to waste my time when ive already wasted so much. i don't even want to be part of any religion, i can't be certain any of them have got it right, because humans are fallible after all, and religions are created by humans. what i want, is to be confident in any believe of god, or confident in non-believe if thats the case. there is a lot in this world that can suggest or imply the existence of omnipotence, and a lot to discourage it, im lost between the two with no guiding light. it's a huge revelation for me to even be open to a god, considering i have spent my whole life as an athiest, i would now call myself agnostic i think. you're right tho, i was rude earlier, i apologize, i shouldn't expect immediate answers, im just so scared and in need of assurance.