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Anonymous /adv/33328295#33328488
7/7/2025, 5:13:00 PM
>>33328477
He’s 6’5” and under 110 lbs. underweight. I told him that, and he just said, “I’m neither skinny nor fat.” That says everything about the way he sees bodies. Additional context is that he has diagnosed ASPD
This past week everything just got worse.
On June 13, we found a kitten. She was sick, barely a month old. But we did everything we could to help her get healthy. She was beautiful a little calico tabby mix. My mom adored her. She was part of our family instantly.
Then on July 4, around 5:30 p.m., I was going upstairs to put away groceries. I felt something under my foot but didn’t process it until I turned around and saw her tumbling down the stairs. Then blood from her ears, her nose, her eyes. I froze. I screamed. My parents ran over. My dad picked her up and took her outside so we wouldn’t have to see her dying. But my mom and I just sat there. On the stairs. Surrounded by blood.
Her screaming I can still hear it. It was one of the worst sounds I’ve ever heard. She was devastated.
Everyone keeps telling me it wasn’t my fault. But I can’t believe that. My dad told me not to clean up the blood, but my mom asked me to because she couldn’t bear to see it. So I did. I grabbed cleaning supplies and started scrubbing. It was on the walls, stairs, the door, even outside. Every few minutes I’d collapse crying, but I kept going. Because it felt like the only thing I could do. I felt like a monster.
That night, I took one of my mom’s Xanax and slept for 15 hours. But it didn’t make anything better. She wasn’t even a month old. And I feel like I killed her.
And when I told him about it? He didn’t comfort me. He blamed me. Harassed me. Said cruel things. Then unadded me. Which might sound like relief, but it’s not. It’s a tactic. He always does it to mess with my head. To make me spiral. It’s never over when he disappears, it’s worse.