IDK, I'm just happy that I bought a packaged sandwich with my beer so after the beer is done and I suddenly feel very hungry, I can reach over and start eating without having to go out again for food.

At age 31, the time for fantasy has past. It'll be enjoyable to step off the bus with my bags in my "home town" after eight months of world travel. But the newness of being "home" will soon fade, and I'll have to resign myself to being the same nobody in my small Colorado town that I was when I first arrived there seven years ago. Buy a bicycle, a backpack and some weed, then go on overnight trips into the wilderness, learning how to sleep rough without a van. It's worth looking forward to.